On Embracing My Masculinity

On Embracing My Masculinity

Hey everyone. I know what you're thinking, is this some feminist type BS? Well, no haha. I didn't choose to be masculine, now the masculinity I'm talking about is more than just my personality or clothing choices, I'm not just a tomboy but I'm androgynous. Meaning I have features that are both masculine and feminine and can look like both genders. However, I'm more masculine looking than feminine (I have quite a sharp jawline and cleft chin, I'm 5'11", I have a deep voice, a sloping forehead along with a receding but okayish hairline haha, high and sharp cheekbones, thin hair, big hands and big feet, big shoulders with small hips or 'apple' body shape, etc.) and I've decided to start embracing my masculinity. Ever since I was young, I was a tomboy who liked mens clothes (still do) and video games and crime or mystery books and I still enjoy those things till this day. I'm a masculine person with a little bit of femininity, and my masculinity shows in my appearance and features, my clothes and my way of thinking.

1. My personality

I'm always seen as a good leader. I always like to take the lead and plan things out. I'm very upfront and honest, which is also seen as a masculine trait. I can be easy going at times and indecisive but that's at personal things, at professional settings I'm the complete opposite and my purpose is to get things done in the best way possible. I'm also the kind of person who will always try to give you advice or help you out when you come to me with an issue, which is not very appreciated by other women and I've started to learn that they just want someone to listen to them unless they state otherwise (however I hate that and if I go to someone with my problem or they ask me what's wrong I don't wanna hear a 'damn, that sucks' I'd rather they discuss with me and lay out the options or give me a different perspective to see things with). I'm quite assertive as well but I can be very very shy and insecure at times and I'm a very sensitive person (that's my more feminine side). I'm very wise and a critical and logical thinker, everything has to make sense all the time and I rarely consider the emotional aspect of things which can be bad sometimes but thats basically my masculine side. After all of this though, I still have a submissive personality at times. I will try to please everyone, do everything right and sometimes don't even stand up for myself (that's more a pushover than submissive though). I think i have a good balance between masculinity and femininity when it comes to personality and I'm not super submissive or super dominant.

2. My looks

I've already briefly mentioned my masculine features, but my looks have always been androgynous/sharper than the other girls. It's something I'm still working on accepting, however most of the time I don't care and I don't mind how I look unless I'm trying to look feminine to fit in (which I hate looking feminine if I'm being honest. With my features, height and body type I just can't pull off the feminine cute girl look). I've learned that I only appreciate dark makeup (i don't wear it outside the house of course but I still like it) and the whole gothic look or punk look I'm into that and like masculinizing my features and making them all blend together. I have really deep set but big eyes and they look really nice so I like the heavy makeup that makes them look even more squinted and deep set if that makes sense, kind of like a feline's eye. And I like my other sharp features as well, however I hate looking androgynous at times because I don't want to be in the middle, I'd rather look fully feminine or fully masculine and fully masculine is more my thing. As for my body type I like it and I like building muscle in my arms and legs and wearing mens clothes.

3. My style

Like I said I've always been kind of a tomboy and dressing in mens clothes or in more casual and comfortable looking clothes. I like mens hoodies, T shirts, Jean's, jackets, and long sleeve shirts. I still wear feminine clothes from time to time but like I said they don't fit me right for my body type and I don't pull them off. But for example pairing a skirt with a mens t-shirt and a cardigan with flats or sports shoes can look very good and I get compliments on my outfits all the time. Or a dress with Van's, or a skirt with a mens long sleeve t shirt. Or a hoodie with a dress/skirt. All of these feminine/masculine pairings I can actually pull off very well and I love my personal style. I can pull off mens clothes very well and I'm proud of that haha.

4. My hobbies

I enjoy reading up on a lot of scientific things and I enjoy more action/thriller/noir like films and video games. I also liked playing in the mud as a kid and I liked climbing anything like trees or a small hill haha, and mostly anything I like is always a bit more on the masculine side. However, I still like watching chick flicks from time to time and I still liked makeup and nail polish and pink stuff ever since I was a kid (I'll talk more about that in another take). However I'd say my interests always click more with the guys than the girls.

Now before anyone says it, I do not care if you don't find this attractive (I don't know why, but people always feel the need to judge how I look or what i wear and say they don't find it appealing, well buddy I don't live my life for you to like me). Also, my style and looks are no indications of my sexual preferences, some people may get confused but I don't mind haha it isn't offensive. The same way most girls love embracing their femininity and most guys like embracing their masculinity, I like embracing both but more my masculinity. I might write a take on how I embrace my femininity in my own personal way in the few times I do embrace it. And I'm learning to like myself the way I am and embrace who I am whether or not society likes it or dislikes it I am also learning to give less of a shit about that.

There is also nothing wrong with being a feminine man or a masculine woman like myself especially if your features or body type are just naturally like that. No one should try to be someone other than themselves to please others or try to fit in, if we all try to fit in we will be changing ourselves till eternity trying to please everyone. I say screw it, I'll live however I wanna live. And if you're a naturally balanced or masculine male or feminine female, that's also good. I'm in no way saying you should be like me or force yourself to be something you're not. Embrace your masculinity or embrace your femininity or both at the same time, it's up to you and what you like and feel comfortable with. The key is accepting yourself and being whatever the hell you wanna be!

Hope you liked this take!


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Most Helpful Guys

  • Sorry to break it to you, but you're a girl, not 'androgynous." Nothing wrong with being a girl who acts/dresses in a masculine manner. But you're still a girl. You wanna wear men's clothes? Cool!

    As for the leadership/bluntness you mentioned, I don't consider that masculine at all. That's just strength, nothing more, nothing less.

    Otherwise, before you get angry, the only thing I'm really taking issue with is the word androgynous, because there are only two genders. But good take! Happy you're able to embrace your own personal style.

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    • Androgynous doesn't mean gender fluid. Androgynous means someone who dresses or looks both masculine and feminine , you know those types of guys who have feminine features or those types of girls that have masculine features and can look like either gender. I'm well aware that I'm a girl , I'm not gender fluid which I think is what you're referring to.

    • Androgynous means high estrogen and hihg testosterone levels. I would be androgynous because of the MMA. Most well rounded woman are

  • I have actually felt pressured to act more feminine than I am, because during most of my high school years, I was surrounded by people who encouraged others to breaks gender norms just for the sake of breaking gender norms. I was led to believe that my dominant and competitive personality was just a way to try and fit in. I actually tried to have a more feminine personality for a while, but I didn't feel comfortable in it. So this can go both ways.

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    • Well as long as you feel much more comfortable and like yourself now being masculine and dominant, that's all that matters.
      It's certainly the opposite for me , there is a huge amount of pressure to try and fit some physical and personality standard for femininity that I already can't fit in with for so many reasons, so I just said fuck it and became whomever i wanted to be.

    • You were being had by liberals son

Most Helpful Girls

  • I don’t think most women love embracing their femininity or rather limiting themselves to that definition. Nor men with masculinity. I think about 5 % are extreme and speak if it loudly, but most women and men are in the middle and embrace their traits rather than defining themselves in one spectrum or the other.

    Nothing wrong in anything you said and it’s great you are comfortable with yourself but I don’t think masculine/ feminine mean much inherently bc the definition changes easily over time.

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  • You sound like a cool person that I'd like to befriend

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What Guys Said 39

  • Thanks for sharing!!! This was really cool!! It is fun to see this side of you and to be open to share this side of you with us gaggers!! What kinds of games do you like?

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    • L. A. noire , life Is strange , mafia 3 , elder scrolls oblivion , GTA IV ( I played almost all of them but my faves have to be gta 4 , San Andreas and vice city ) . I also occasionally play some pokemon and harvest moon for the nostalgia haha.

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    • L. A. noire is my all time favourite , played the game like 4 times haha. It's also set in the 1940s which is one of my favourite era's ! The ending was a little disappointing haha but when you get to play with jack that was way more fun.
      Life is strange is very depressing, I thought it was going to be an edgy teenagers game but it was very well done. A bit gloomy but I still loved it. I liked before the storm more though since it explains what happens in the original one.

    • I have yet to play before the storm and I am looking forward to it! Thanks for the thoughtful reply back!!

  • There's nothing wrong with being a feminine man or a masculine woman. But, feminine men are a turn off to most women; as are masculine women to most men. So, it would substantially decrease their dating pool.

    But, I spent years "being myself" and not trying to "fit in." And I learned the opposite. I want to fit in, and I'm okay changing myself to some extent in order to do so. I like being liked. And I like being desired.

    Nothing wrong with not wanting to change. But there are consequences that go along with that, along with everything.

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    • I think straight yet feminine men have it much harder than masculine women.

      I’m have a masculine appearance (muscular defined body) but I got some feminine sensitivity (nice guy). No one respects that deep down, especially women. It takes a lot of effort to bury it.

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    • I assumed it was general knowledge.

    • @lilaqua I mean, the idea has been around for a couple decades, but not as general knowledge, as far as I'm aware. Except to evolutionary psychologists. Were you to ask most people, I don't think they would agree that women go through a form of "heat". Perhaps it is in Australia?

  • Your face is breathtaking the rest (the ink) no thanks

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  • Nice, everyone should live life their own way as long as it doesn't unjustly harm others (justly harming other is fine #batman). Also, glad you did more with this than just seeing masculinity as a style choice.

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  • This is the most moderate and balanced post talking about this sensitive topic I've seen on here. Im genuinely pleased.

    There is nothing inherently wrong with being more masculine or feminine than is typically found in each respective sex. But we need to understand that we are still men and women. Something you seem to have accepted. Also I find you are brave because you don't feel you need to change who you are to be yourself.

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  • Sweet mytake! Fully support this because it's who you are so no point not embracing it ^_^ proud of you :)

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  • The main thing is that you're comfortable with yourself, because it's hard to go through life without that, Glad to hear you're comfortable with yourself.

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  • You should look more feminine to attract guys. It will be good in relationship, if you share really much the same interests as guys.

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    • I stopped dating. And I'm happy being who I am , I'm not going to change myself to get a guy. How is that a good thing? Many guys complain that girls change themselves and they aren't into 'fakeness' yet I somehow have to become more feminine?

    • But very likely you wouldn't like a girlish guy. It goes to other way too.

    • I actually fell for many feminine men , both in personality and appearance. Many times.

  • You can, but you know a masculine woman is not something very appreciated among men.
    Therefore you know that it will have consequences, and you won't be able to force people to like it.

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    • I already mentioned that , and said that I dont care if people dont find it attractive. And I also said I stopped dating a few years ago on another take so I personally dont care whether or not anyone find me attractive or not.

    • Then I don't understand the point of your take. Basically, you don't care about anyone or anything, yet you still talk about it.

    • It's to vent and express my own opinion. I care what others think about masculinity and if they themselves are the same or the opposite. But I didn't post this to get the whole ' oh but men dont find it attractive ' response I always get. Not everything a person does is for attracting others.
      These takes also help me accept myself more and talk about who I am as a person.

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What Girls Said 20

  • You do you, whatever makes you happy and whatever that means! Good for you for being open about it though😊

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  • I was too distracted by the picture, but I got the jist ^_^

    You do you, it's better to embrace who you are than to bottle it up.

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  • Good mytake. It’s not always easy to learn on how to accept yourself and appreciate what you can’t change, and I think you are great being. Keep being you.

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  • Definitely an interesting mytake to read. Not for everyone but if you can, embrace it.

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  • "Masculine" and "feminine" are just arbitrary social concepts anyways.

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  • Embracing your own self is such an important thing people don't do. It's awesome that you have embraced yourself.
    All the best for the future :)

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  • Only way you can "embrace your masculinity" is if you have a dick amirite lads

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  • All you can do is embrace yourself at the end. :) #Selflove

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  • Adrogyny seems more common on millenials

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    • Yep, a lot of millenials have fucked up hormone levels.

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    • @englisc well ruby rose looks much more feminine , I look a little more masculine than that. And there is nothing wrong with me health wise , I have very high estrogen levels and low testosterone levels and I think it's just genetics.

  • Nice take

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