Girl withdraws after sex?

[Anonymous]

I (29/m) have been seeing this girl (25/f) for 3 weeks before she suggested we go on a weekend trip together. We had sex on the night we stayed over, but the next day things became strange. While driving she refused me to have my hand rest on her thigh and she wanted to go home earlier than expected and did not want to be dropped right at her door step but instead a 5 min walk away from home. The next day she completely ignored my messages until night, claiming to be sick, not wanting to speak to anyone and rejected my idea of bringing soup and medication to her home. Am I over-reacting or is this unusual?

Updates

+1 y

She appears to enjoy herself during sex, very loud moans and claws into my arm, and kept kissing really intensely after sex.

Updates

+1 y

This is the first time we had sex

[Anonymous]

The few times I lost my interest after sexual interactions, those sexual interactions where bad. I hate to say this but you probably did something she didn't like and it made her no longer attracted to you. It doesn't have to mean you did something generally bad, it could just have been not to her personal liking.

The other option is something else changed that weekend. It happens often that initial attraction fades when you get to know each other a bit better and find out the other person is not who you thught they were.
I once met this guy who seemed about 5 years older than me, made jokes, complimented me and seemed like a great dancer. When I got to know him he kept making the same lame jokes over and over again, turned out to be 9 years older than me, was still jobless and doing a study that wouldn't get him anywhere plus he went way too fast, grabbing my boobs and butt immediately when we kissed without my permission or giving me time to refuse. No way that I still want him now, although only the groping is technically "wrong", the rest is just taste.

[Asker]

Should I ask her about what may have upset her? What should I do next?

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah you should. She may say she is interested and just really sick, she may just keep acting the same or say she just doesn't want you anymore (in which case you're not worse off than you are already) or dhe may tell you the reason she doesn't like you anymore, which is a learning experience. It might be a difference in taste or it might be something you didn't realise but can change easily (like making the same joke too much, not asking for consent, or a hygiene problem).

[AthleticMom]

GUILT
has its fingerprints ALL over this, on each piece of evidence you offered

Shall I imagine why she suggested taking you out for a test drive?
She's recreating a sex scene from the past that she misses/craves from an old lover and used you like a one night stand to scratch that itch.
The sex described was NOT bad (as I read from 10 second reflection guesses below) but no guy is going to be EXACTLY same as old lover, especially as embellished in her memory.

Afterwards, she did not erase & replace the lover memories as expected, it went the other way - now she craves him even more and this could be a complement to your bedroom satisfactions. So much she wishes to be reunited, she now (crazy) thinks of herself as "cheating" on him and will do everything in her power (in the short run) to avoid you and recapture him.

After this fails, you may be able to coax her back into your life slowly and soon after, both of you will discover if this is going to be a real, lasting match or just another one night stand.

[AIAthefirst]

she definitely regrets it, probably didn't enjoy the sex, has a boyfriend and was cheating, or misses an old flame. or... maybe she's just a basic bitch.
this may seem like a bad idea but what's the worse that could happen, hang out more with your girl pals ( make sure they are 2) and see how she reacts, you did the chasing now become the chasee' or something like that and maybe you could have your girl pal talk to her after she knows you two of Course. when it shows she is losing her options she'll come running back (basic bitch) or if she's sad then it's something else. good luck.

[desidoll]

The sex sucks. This isn't something uncommon. People usually think the other way around but obviously when it happened to you, I'm sure it happened to some other guys too. She lost interest but I'm not sure her reason. My guess would be because of the sex.

[MoonlitSonata]

Sounds like you were a one night stand, and she was feeling the walk of shame.

[Prince_teddy4u]

Seems like she was not ready for sex with you in 3 weeks. She's worried.

[Cccgala]

This is very unusual. I think there is something that your girl isn't telling you. You may have done something that she despised during your sex.

[itsallover]

She's lost interest, probably because she didn't enjoy the sex. At all.

[helloitsmethere]

It is either she didn't actually like it and was faking the moans OR she was feeling guilty.

[9mfeo]

Apparently the sex was very very bad.

[Becky01]

do you know if she was a virgin

[Asker]

She's not a virgin.

[Becky01]

ok just keep trying to communicate with her and tell her you can't fix what went wrong if she won't talk to you. Tell her how you feel about her.
sorry that's the best I can think of

[Anonymous]

You must have done something that upset her.