Losing interest after sex?

Question

I’m a 23 year old woman, my ex boyfriend and I mutually parted ways 4 months ago and just recently I had sex for the first time with another man (I had been with my ex since 17). I really just wanted to experience sex with someone else, to really feel like I could no longer say my ex was my only and fully move on. So after a few dates with this attractive French man, we did it. It was good, nothing crazy amazing but also way less scary than I thought and it boosted my confidence.

However, I have this weird lack of interest towards him now. It was never going to be serious as he’s going back to France shortly but I thought I’d keep seeing him until then. But almost immediately after we were done I felt so detached. No regrets at all but now that the mystery is gone I’m kind of indifferent. I’ve heard this from Men a lot, but not often women so I’m confused why I might feel like this, is it normal? He asked to see me again this week and I’m not sure if I want to, do you think I should give it one more try or just leave it?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I don't know why that happened to you I can only assume..
I assume that women in general don't search for flings, but rather we want sex with someone who we love and know we can form a future with over all... and you knowing that it was just going to be a fling type of thing and more importantly that he is leaving, then your brain finds it unappealing, uninteresting and loss of desire therefore created because without thinking about it you already know it's nothing that can be offered to you over than sex which you already had with this said person.

That is my conclusion
I had an enormous attraction to my boyfriend and after we had sex I wanted him more but then we realized we can't really be together for number of reasons, and then suddenly the sexual desire has died off from my part (perhaps because I too see no future there?) he has mentioned a couple times he's thought about me and I just dismiss it as I have no interest at all and it makes me sad, I wish I did but it's gone.. perhaps in the future if I see a possible future with this man, then the desire could return? and perhaps if you also see a possibility with that man you could develop a sexual desire for him again? I really don't know it's just what I can conclude as oppose to men who really just want to fuck any hole, which is why don't don't lose sexual interest even if they know there's nothing more than sex there..

RearEntryGuy · Accepted Answer

"Losing interest"?

Perhaps you got it wrong. There was no interest to begin with. All the guy wanted was a "conquest".

And in person I had a colleague. Once he had a girlfriend and she was so crushed with him, liked all his FB status and shared whatever silly stuffs he posted.

Then suddenly, she's gone. That day I knew. They slept together the night before.

Yes, I knew because there were too many such cases among my younger team and colleagues.

Thus not to sound insensitive, it's time to stop thinking and move on. Anymore thoughts will only prolong your agony and you may end up needing medication.

Good day to you.

AncientWisdom · Accepted Answer

I don’t think it’s all that odd. You was in a long term he was your only. You tried some strange you got your answer.
I’m a 55 year old bachelor I like the single life and doing whatever I want also if I’m being honest I love variety and get bored easily. So having presented my credentials to speak; in my experience many females need more then just a sexual connection to a lover. They need an emotional connection. Sounds to me like your normal. Hope this helps have a wonderful evening.

VikingWarLord · Answer

Monogamy is NOT natural. We eventually get tired of fuucking that same person. Most married couples are living like roommates with no sex life and/or fuucking other people on the side.

Read the book "SEX AT DAWN" by Cacilda Jetha and Christopher Ryan. It'll make sense to you why that happened.

Anonymous · Answer

Since you only really wanted to experience the sex, I don't find the turn of events surprising at all.

Most people don't need sex strongly enough to go back for it regularly.
Especially if they have to go out of their way just to get laid again.
Not unless there is a specific drive or appeal.

You found out it's just decent and that there probably isn't much interesting about the guy past that, and that's that.

jahaims · Answer

You feel detached because you had emotionless sex

awkward_author · Answer

That's completely normal. Maybe, in reality, you wanted a one night stand, and that's it?

TheFlak38 · Answer

the definition of a slut

Anonymous · Answer

He basically hit it and quit it.

vegeta100 · Answer

How do I find girls like u lol

Anonymous · Answer

Your high school sweetheart I assume

DaSir · Answer

That’s sad

Losing interest after sex?

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