Can someone explain why women get upset over men dumping them because they got fat?

[Anonymous]

So i remember in another question men vs women:whose more shallow a girl was spamming this in replies to justify that men are more shallow than women. Since the vast majority of males said yes while women said no.

Would you dump your SO if they got fat

What i don't understand is why women get upset over something they can actively control by being disciplined and going to the gym for. Women by in large are very picky and tend to always talk about how they can't love or get into a relationship with someone they aren't physically attracted to and use that for justification for not dating average guys or short guys.

Yet, they expect men to continue fucking them and being with them even though they have greatly decreased their physical attractiveness in his eyes. It's like a catch 22, you buy a beautiful car that awesome on the outside only for it to start giving trouble and breaking down repeatedly on you within a couple months;you'd be pissed too.

And you what, there is a hypocrisy to this whole thing. It's been shown women by in large leave men if they lose their job and take too long to find another. It's been shown women will leave a man for another person if she believes they are of higher value and open to wanting to get into a relationship with them.

Yet, somehow a man dumping his girlfriend because she couldn't put down the ice cream, and chocolates is a sexist, shallow pig. WTF society?

[Carefuloutthere]

You know she's heavily pregnant in that picture right? ... and despite what you believe, baby weight doesn't drop off two hours after you've had a baby.
A guy who breaks up with a woman because he expected it to IS the biggest asshole.

You are right, your partner needs to be attracted to you. Guys especially want the person that they fell for.
This why I don't get why so many people say they put on weight in their relationship because they've got comfortable. I'm the other way around, I'm more self conscious about my body when I'm in a relationship. When I'm having sex on a regular basis, I want that person to keep wanting to have, and enjoy having sex with me.
I don't want them to regret getting involved with me because they're embarrassed or turned off.

I think the reason some people get upset is because we are wired differently. We wouldn't do that ourselves ( and many men DO put on weight in relationships, so it can be hypocritical) we're attracted to everything about you regardless.
The guy I was with before my last relationship was slightly overweight, but I wasn't attracted to him because of one thing, lots of things made him hot to me - How funny he was, how, shy he was, how protective he was... etc

I think what it is is that you're expected to see beyond the superficial when you're with someone.

[Blink101]

It has to do with women facing far more consequences than men if they are not exceptionally attractive. And by exceptionally attractive, I mean when women risk being shamed or harassed for not projecting a false appearance of perfection. Such as not wearing make up, wearing too much make up, shaving their legs, shaving their arm pits, not having a curvy body, not being rail thin, not dressing sexy, not dressing modestly, etc. Both genders face pressure to be attractive, but women face outright harassment and discrimination alongside the pressure if they don't do the above. Unfortunately, we still live in a society where a woman's value or competence is largely determined by her physical attractiveness. Men, on the other hand, can do things like wear the same suit every single day to work without anyone commenting or judging them as less competent, as demonstrated by Australian news anchor Karl Stefanovic. It is hypocritical but it is also perfectly understandable that women are more hurt by body shaming since a large part of the female experience involves people judging your appearance and associating your looks with your entire worth as a human being.

[bat0209]

You're correct in WTF society. It is clearly unequal to have different standards for each gender. Males are stereotyped to be the "Built, dominate, aggressive" individuals while females are stereotyped to be "Dainty, innocent, submissive". It is evident that with all of the feminist movements occurring that females are breaking out of this shell of a stereotype however little has been done to help males do the same. I mean women wear trousers easily while many men are harassed for wearing a skirt/dress. It isn't right (in my opinion) for EITHER gender to be so shallow to divorce/breakup with their romantic partner simply because their appearance is no longer appealing to them.

[RandomBritishGuy94]

It's fair simple. At that point they think they have an honest emotional connection. If you dump someone because they are fat it wasn't that deep of a connection.

Take them to the gym with you. Push them to short it out. I'd expect her to do the same.

[Marinepilot]

Everything you said is true in spades ! Well stated.

[Rissyanne]

If you broke up with her for that.. the relationship didn't mean anything in the first place. So I doubt she would care. On the flip side I keep in shape for myself... but also I love my boyfriend and to be desirable to him. He doesn't make me or shame me into working out. He does tell me that I am beautiful and sexy quite often.