How to break down a woman's emotional walls?

[Viking2015]

Ok so wen a woman's got her walls up, and she's pretty much automatically rejecting anything emotional but still interacting. How do you break that down?

So the scenario is we got close and the walls for some for some reason went up.

Ladies what's worked for you to get them down?

Guys have you managed to get over this situation and get the woman before?

[Fitness-Fanatic]

She'll need to feel emotionally safe before she lets her guard down, but only she knows what makes her feel emotionally safe and unsafe.

Everyone is different , and different things make people feel emotionally unsafe. So it's not easy breaking down someone's walls. Only time and patience gains people's trust. Trust breaks down their barriers.. But it depends on her personally issues

[jenNjuice85]

Be that obnoxious, cute, annoying guy who persistently pushes at those walls. Be the one to put her in an uncomfortable situation, but only between the two of u. And trust me, shell eventually give up. But when u do, she's gonna be stuck like glue. So make sure that's what u want for the long haul

[Viking2015]

Interesting way of looking at it.. have you seen that work?

[Astoriana]

I only like men who respect me and my decisions. Looking for advice on how to disrespect someone isn’t looking well on you, buddy.

[Viking2015]

Think you're misinterpreting the question but that's rejecting is the wrong word. She has never given a clear rejection in fact she continues to meet me and talk. She just doesn't initiate much anymore.

[Astoriana]

Friends exist. Have you ever considered that she just doesn’t like you?

[Viking2015]

I have and I've called her on it. I asked her out right she never gave me an answer.

As I said at first the situation was romantic. Then all of a sudden walls went up. I've considered my behaviour at the time, spoken to her but again she never gives me a strait answer. One minute it's like it used to be the next the walls back up.

[Astoriana]

She doesn’t want to date you, or she doesn’t trust you. You decide which is more likely.

[Viking2015]

Obviously I can't type the full story her. Not enough space. Based on my behaviour and her actions/words at the time I'd go with trust.

[mattl338]

Please excuse my brash tone, but that is dogshit advice. First of all you're assuming many things here, one being that he isn't disrespecting anyone. Second of all, he's simply asking for advice on what to do, no need to be so harsh and say "Have you ever considered that she just doesn't like you?" because that helps literally nothing. Stop making this so black and white because we don't know how she feels, just because you are a girl yourself doesn't mean you know what she's feeling, she probably does like him but is scared of intimacy or being vulnerable, have you ever considered that? Because I have experience in this type of thing because I've met girls like that and from what he's saying, she seems scared of either commitment, being close to someone, intimacy, or being vulnerable. It's not always so black and white as "maybe she doesn't like or trust you" because we don't know what she's feeling, think about that.

[mattl338]

he is disrespecting her* my bad.

[jammy85]

You shouldn't have to break her walls down. If she liked you she would be an open book. She wouldn't be playing games.

[mattl338]

That's not true at all, people put up emotional walls because of very specific reasons, either that or because they are scared. I have emotional walls because women I loved and trusted destroyed my trust and heart into thousands of pieces, the same could have happened to this girl. Its no game, >:/ it's simply fear of intimacy and/or fear or being vulnerable. People who have emotional walls have them for a reason, not a game whatsoever, people who are playing games don't have emotional walls, they're just playing games, don't confuse the two.

[Nunote]

So you're trying to force her to accept what she doesn't want? Real nice dude. She'll let them down if she wants to.

[Viking2015]

No you've misunderstood the situation.

We were romantic at first then she put a wall up. She's continuing to blow hot and cold. Close one minute wall up the next. She's never answered me when I've asked her. She's never given me a clear rejection of any kind she just carries on with the hot and cold stuff. I actually walked away from her and she continued talking. As I said to someone else this isn't room enough to type the entire story. It's not as simple as that. It's more like she's confused or something.

[Nunote]

Then just leave her to figure things out. Trying to keep the walls down isn't gonna work. The thing about them is that they lock from the inside.

[Máiiréad]

You can’t. 🙃

[Viking2015]

You mean it had to be her choice?

[Josemanuel2]

You got it :) haha. Respect decisions. You can try with others, don't hope anything :).

[mattl338]

You need to be patient, breaking someone's walls takes time, understand she is probably scared of letting someone (maybe especially a guy) get close to her, which is perfectly understandable. Don't push it or you'll lose her. Respect her decision, if you don't approve of it or you don't have a good feeling about it, find someone else.