My girlfriend has changed.... how do I get her back?

[derek1127]

my girlfriend used to be a great girl who thought everything I did was great and didn't care about what I did really.

now she gets annoyed by anything I do.( for example childhood habits that are harmless like shaking my leg or messing with my sleeves on my shirt) when I do anything like that she gets furious. she also has become extremely jealous and tries to control everything I do. sometimes I miss out on things I enjoy the most because she doesn't think I should do it. All I'm saying is I want my old girlfriend back. Does anyone have suggestions?

[bolverk]

Suggest you go quiet, - do not chase her, If she has any knowledge about you your passwords for bank accounts, social media etc change them ASAP, and freeze you credit it will stop any credit cards/loans being taken out in you name. And start being "Grey Rock" (google it) in regards to you girlfriend.

I do hope you are not living together, If you are police together anything that she may have left neatly into boxes.

When she contacts you, ask her point blank "Do you want to break up? As the way you've been acting makes me think you do!" Then sit quietly while she runs through the usual play-book, anger, tears, etc

Do Not React. When she quietens down ask bluntly "What do you what to do? I'm sick of the anger and the jealousy, the next move is yours".

[Nutz76]

Sounds like she's getting ready to trade up to another guy that's giving her attention and doesn't have the "flaws" she's noticing about you. She'll backwards rationalize it as you driving her away. Seen it bunch of times.

[NiLauRoRa]

You of all people know she is not like this. Right now she is probably depressed. I don't know if you did anything to make her feel so insecure? maybe cheat on her or somethign? idk

If you did do something to get her like this then give her a lot of love, attention, and honest communication. And trust me she will eventually get over it and go back to herself and maybe even a better version of her old self.

If you didnt' do anything to get her like this then leave. It's hurting you and wasting your time. There are plenty of more fish in the sea.

Also, I think everyone shakes their leg or messes with their sleeves. I've seen 10000+ people do that. I'm sure she's done that too.

[Shlei3]

Unfortunately this is why the phrase "We grew apart" is so common. People grow and develop over time. Sometimes that happens to be the so apart from their loved one that it's difficult to be in a relationships. You cannot change her. You can only talk to her about it. And if you have done so for a while now then you can either stay with her or you can choose to part ways. Neither of the choices are fun. The newness of your relationship has faded and you are now left with the everyday hum of the relationship. You have got to talk to her about it, let time go by and then make a decision. Good luck. Remember, she's not going to change unless she wants to.

[miszxnessa]

awww. I feel like I'm becoming this way with my boyfriend. and it sucks. personally, why I do it.is because I couldn't stand losing him [jealous part] . and as for the habits. you guys are so comfortable with eachother. maybe she always hated it.kept it in so long.just think if your not happy now. can you spend the rest of your life in marriage with her? eye-opener

good luck :)

[derek1127]

True I don't think I could and she doesn't either she just won't admit it

[miszxnessa]

Well, give her an ultimatum..

start off by sayin' I really miss my old girlfriend and wish I still had her you know? or I don't know if I can continue because now I have someone watchin' my every step..

maybe itll open her eyes that she gonna lose the ones she loves by her actions.

[rudybooty]

Find out if she's having any personal problems that you aren't awarw of. You guys should like just sit down and talk and explain the situation to her. Probably take some time apart (not a breakup) just clear both y'all heads!

[MJackson1234]

Break up. I hate to tell you but these are red flags for either cheating or her real self. Most likely cheating and she is taking her guilt on you and creating justfication for her actions.

Also please explain to me what is the point of dating? My understanding is venting out for a potential life partner. So you want to know if this person that you felt an attraction and emotionally connected with is worthy of your love and emotions. You want to know if they will not change, cheat, good fit, etc. Congratulations! You found your answer. The whole he/she were amazing is BS. That's the con. Unless you are mentally ill you will not chase or start dating someone that was horrible to you from the get go. You date them because you assume they are great and then remain in the relationship to verify that and hopefully further your relationship. You found out that wasn't the case for whatever reason. So move on.

[OlderAndWiser]

1. This IS your old girlfriend. She has simply let down her guard and is revealing her true self to you.

2. When someone acts like what you describe, there is usually some other issue - a significant issue - that is causing conflict for her and which you two are not addressing. OR she is irritable because she is cheating and feeling guilty.

[tfan1]

Could be a side effect of the birth control she’s on. My wife used to be on that Provo shot and it turned her evil. I’ll give you a for example - I kissed her and asked if she would like to have sex. She said next time you masturbate, I hope your penis falls off in toilet! We got her off of it and what a change! I got my sweet wife back 👍🙂 She went with a IUD instead 🙂.

[queeniegreen]

Let her know that you feel like she has been over controlling you and you feel like your relationship is in jeopardy. Just talk to her about it

[Gabriel-Chicanito]

Fix your mistakes that annoyed'er. And write'r a letter.

[WhitneySnow]

Talk to her. Tell her how you feel.

[In_Trance]

You can't go back