Got walked-in on... embarrassed?

[BruinBlue2]

I have a female roommate who’s sorority-sister friend saw me naked and now I feel awkward... I’m trying to get an understanding about what her reaction might have been and whether it’s likely or not that she will tell (and what she might tell) my roommate/ her other sorority sisters. Her friend knocked and then came in while I was in the shower, saying she had to pee really badly and that she was sorry. Our shower door is basically see-thru and, having just woken up, I was ‘standing at attention’ down there when she came in...

Should I be embarrassed? Did she even look or notice? Will she say something, cause my roommate’s sorority sisters are over all the time and I’m feeling embarrassed about what she might have told them...

Honestly, she probably didn’t even notice

As soon as she noticed it, she ignored it

She might have glanced but nothing more and probably won’t say anything

She definitely looked and is going to tell her friends

[Flower7]

You shouldn't be embarrassed since she made the choice to come into the bathroom, knowing that you were naked and showering. It's not like you surprised her and she wasn't expecting it. And since she was in a rush to use the toilet, she probably wasn't paying very much attention to you.

[BruinBlue2]

I’m not sure she knew the door was nearly transparent... or just ‘how’ much would be visible. It’s basically like having a clear shower curtain. I’m worried her catching an eye-full, on top of the state “it” was in, was more than she bargained for. Maybe it even creep’d her out a little? Should I apologize to her for “it” being rigidly obstinate about not going away?

[Flower7]

No, you shouldn't apologize or mention anything about it to her. Any awkwardness will fade naturally over time, but you bringing it up will probably make it worse and draw more attention to the situation. And it's possible that she didn't notice the state you were in.

[BruinBlue2]

The reason I’m asking all this is because I think the embarrassment will dissipate faster if I felt like I even generally knew how a girl might feel in this situation... and since the toilet more or less faces the shower, unless she made a conscious effort NOT to look, everything was basically at eye-level while she was in there. I’m in the dark as to whether none, few, some, or most girls in this situ. would be primarily... curious? embarrassed? upset/grossed-out? ... ?

[Flower7]

Well I personally would be curious and interested, not grossed out at all.

[BruinBlue2]

Thank you for being straight-up about being curious!! That’s what would make sense to me but after asking a friend about this, she said “you mean “curious” like just sitting there looking at “it”? Every girl I know would be grossed out and probably think ur a little creepy or weird cause seeing any penis other than a bf’s is gross and seeing a hard one is even more gross...

I totally get that sentiment if we’re talking about douche bag dudes that are hella aggressive and border on being sexual assaulters or being flashed by some street-bum asshole guy... but it shocked me to think this girl (and most/all girls in her situation) might have been sitting there and feeling something so negative and traumatic just because she saw a completely non-threatening FRIEND’S (kind of, same friend circle, we know each other from parties and stuff) penis? And would it really be “more gross” because “it” was standing at attention while being pretty much totally visible? She lives in the same building and has the same shower door so she knows the person taking a shower only sees blurry blobs of color through the door... if she knew I couldn’t tell whether she was looking or not... why wouldn’t she look? And I would think that seeing a guy with an erection would be MORE curious/interested in “it,” not less AND disgusted by it... am I wrong? I know girls don’t have the same reaction to nudity like guys do. I know she wouldn’t be like turned on AT ALL but I would definitely think, if I were in the girl’s spot (and if I liked men) that it would be more fun/amusing to look at “it” than traumatic or painful...

[BruinBlue2]

I do have one question about whether I handled this the right way: when she first came in I sort of turned into the far shower wall so she could only really see my back but then I thought that might make her feel weird because I was trying to hide “it” rather than just being natural and continuing to shower. So I turned back around and just went about my business but that means she would have been able to see “it” pretty clearly... and in ‘profile’ view, meaning nothing was left to the imagination regarding my “size.” I really didn’t even think about the possibility that she might think my being hard was because I was touching myself and not just because... well, sometimes dicks get hard for reasons known only to them and God

[Flower7]

I'm not understanding why straight women would be so grossed out by penises.

[BruinBlue2]

Kind of where my confusion lies too... if it was offered for you to “play doctor” and examine a naked guy’s genitals but purely in a clinical/ curiosity context, like in some way (and I realize there totally isn’t, so this is hypothetical) it was guaranteed there was no sexual innuendo, and I mean NOTHING of ANYTHING sexual at all, would you want to do it?

[BruinBlue2]

If the situation were reversed, I would want to. And I totally mean there is zero ‘pleasure’ being derived from this, just the simple opportunity to take your time looking, moving, and prodding down there... who wouldn’t be down for that, guy or girl? Cause, in my experience anyway, I’ve never had the opportunity to just ‘look around’ down there on a girl and genuinely be doing it simply out of curiosity regarding what the other gender has going on down there. As I don’t have the same equipment, I would find it fun/amusing but could do so without there needing to be a sexual component

[Just_a_human]

Even if she tells someone, you have nothing to be embarrassed about

[BruinBlue2]

You mean if she didn’t notice it was hard? If she did, wouldn’t she be like grossed out or feel awkward/embarrassed? Because if she says anything about it I figure the erection will be in the story... no?

[Just_a_human]

Whether she noticed or not, it doesn't matter. People take showers and it's common knowledge that males get erections. It's not a big deal.

[BruinBlue2]

Well yea, but I’m concerned more about whether she thought i was touching myself before she came in... if a girl notices the erection, she isn’t going to think anything about it, just kind of blankly take note? I’m not worried about her telling the other sorority girls something about my size but that I was hard and perhaps made assumptions about why...

[Just_a_human]

Even if she starts an absurd rumour about it, does it really matter?

[BruinBlue2]

I would feel better if she didn’t... I don’t want all these girls to think I’m some horny chimpanzee that has no control or decorum. If she does think I was touching myself, what would the average reaction be for a girl in this situation? And if that’s what she told the other girls I was doing in there, won’t they feel weird around me? I know girls know that guys masturbate but when they know (or think they know) that about an individual person, like me in this case, won’t that pop into their head when they are over and I’m hanging out with all of them? What if one of them jokes or asks about it? If I flatly deny everything doesn’t that make it seem even more likely I was doing something gross/inappropriate?

[Just_a_human]

I have no idea how the average girl would react but even if she thought that's what you were doing, it's none of her business and she has no business blabbing her mouth about it to other people. It's not like you were in the common room, you were in the shower.

[BruinBlue2]

That’s certainly how I hope she acts if that’s what she thought I was up to... would you think anything different about the guy if it was you in her place? Is a guy doing that just not register for girls? Like as in: not good or bad or interesting or gross or... anything?

[Just_a_human]

"Is a guy doing that just not register for girls?" I have no idea. I'm sure everyone reacts differently.

[BruinBlue2]

Ok, I just meant you seem like it would have been casual and no big deal if it were you and I’m just curious if you’re more comfortable with that stuff (like on the whole spectrum of how women might feel in that situation) or if I’m over reacting about thinking she would even bother to look. I guess I don’t really care whether she did or not but just if she might have had some kind of strong reaction one way or the other or the other... sounds like you think probably not. That’s good to hear!

[Just_a_human]

I don't know how comfortable I am with that stuff. I'm not exposed to sexual situations, but I do know that I wouldn't bring it up or tell anyone about it. I would pretend it never happened.

[BruinBlue2]

That’s very noble and kind-hearted of you... I sincerely hope she shares your sentiment. I guess I’m hopeful it was more just non-sexual curiosity she felt and not anything negative or traumatic

[Ericalovescats]

Probably noticed but really if she came in while you were showering what did she expect? We know guys have erections, it's not a secret and we know you have dicks. It's probably fine.

[BruinBlue2]

For sure, girls know the parts guys have but I doubt she was warned the door is ‘kinda’ see through (we now know it’s VERY see thru) so my guess is that it came as a surprise... I’d feel better if she likely found seeing a naked guy get visibly hard was more amusing and not offensive or gross. The setup of the bathroom basically guarantees from the toilet she would have been eye-height with “it” and maybe 4 feet away. It must have been pretty “in her face” and that’s what I’m feeling bad about

[Ericalovescats]

Honestly if she found it offensive, too bad. Yeah sure the shower may not have been known to be see through but in all honesty if she was that offended she should have left.
She either A.) didn't care and found it amusing

or B.) was grossed out but had to pee and didn't care enough and put up with it by her own free will.

You were in there first, if she was upset by it that's on her.

Given that she entered I doubt she minded.

[BruinBlue2]

Ok, so just seeing “it” isn’t automatically gross necessarily. Is probability more like 10% amused : 90% grossed out or the other way around?

[Ericalovescats]

I dunno some girls who've never seen a penis before might be more grossed out by it than others but honestly I'd say that yeah seeing it alone probably isn't that big of a deal.

[BruinBlue2]

Ok cool, THANK YOU!!!

[BruinBlue2]

So at that age you would have been more amused than grossed out?

[NatalieKeller95]

house rules, now you got to go out with them, once they see your package, you have to date them

[BruinBlue2]

I’m not sure that’s universal... besides I’m a bit older (24) and she’s like around 18 (h. s. Senior). That’s too close to pedo for me

[NatalieKeller95]

oof true,

[ksmiller]

It's not a big deal. Nothing to be embarrassed about.