Is the friendzone equally as insulting to women as it is to men?

[Anonymous]

DISCLAIMER:

My definition of the friendzone is this: an incongruent attraction between two people. The person who is less interested (or not interested at all) likes the company, attention and benefits. However they don’t speak up about where they stand but instead lead the person on for their own benefit. Bottom line is the person with lesser interest knows they have an emotional angle to get more out of the interested person than other people (and they milk it). It’s not a true friendship.

But if someone speaks up about where they stand (early) then that isn’t the “friendzone” to me. That’s actually showing respect.

However I am guilty of “friendzoning” women when I was much younger. I didn’t take advantage of the situation but I didn’t communicate either. But when it was done to me (more than once) not only did the girl not communicate but she completely took advantage of everything men do for women when it comes to dating (spending money, watching over her, favors, attention, etc).

I wised up to that bullshit a long time ago. However I wonder how this feels when it’s been done to a woman.

I’ve been friendzoned before and it sucked

I’ve never been friendzoned but it hurts women just as much

I’ve been friendzoned and it wasn’t that bad

I’ve never been friendzoned and I don’t think it’s that big of a deal.

[Lionman95]

I´ve been friendzoned quiet often and learned to live with it. For me it´s not a big deal because I´m not that much into sex and so I´m not very frustrated about it. But I can understand why it´s different for other guys.

[Asker]

Attraction isn’t a choice. I’ll never fault anyone for not feeling the same way as I feel about them. Mature people accept that (burns but you accept it).

But more often than not women tend to feel little shame or guilt taking all the benefits in this scenario. It’s usually because they never had it done to them. But I’m wondering if it’s different for them when it does happen.