Woman said to “text her sometime”, but she ignored me?

[Anonymous]

I’ve been talking to this woman for a while now, we’re actually friends, but I do have some romantic interest in her. Now we had a decent text convo recently, and I took a while to get back to her (around 20 minutes), but then before I could say anything, she says she’s leaving and that it was good catching up, and she had to go take a bath. She told me to “text her sometime” and said good night. I texted back saying I would text her and that she can text me as well, and she said she would.

Fast forward 3 days, I text her basically saying “What’s up?” and she completely ignores me. Wtf? Why would she tell me to text her and then ignore me when I do? Even if she doesn’t have any romantic interest in me and sees as just a friend, the question still stands, why did she ignore me? Perhaps she’s playing some kind of game and wants me to try harder? Or she’s mad I’m not asking her out?

For a little backstory, I met her at work years ago and she gave me her number. I left the job a few months ago, and on my last day, she repeatedly told me to text her, and I did, but she kinda kept blowing me off, so I eventually just let it go. Now recently, I got back in contact with her and we did some catching up, and that’s when she told me to “text her sometime”. So yeah, any idea on what’s going on here? Greatly appreciated

[AmandaYVR]

I don't know. Maybe nothing, or maybe she was busy, or uninspired. I would not assume she's playing games or mad or wants you to try harder. Don't default to those. They're unnecessarily negative and overly complicated.

But "What's up?" is not interesting. It puts the ball in her court. It begins a conversation (or tries to) but it's uninspiring.

I really have to write a mytake about all this. There are hundreds of queries each day and week about this.
Think of the internet as a court. There's a person standing there, and a bunch of balls are flying past them. Big ones, small ones, colourful ones, plain coloured ones. They wing past your head. You glance at every one. It's not easy to stop, choose one, focus on that ball only, and not see any of the others.
It's not always a reflection of their feelings about your ball. There are myriad distractions and sometimes the one that is closest, or most recent, catches your eye.
And this isn't even taking into consideration all the other courts, doors, windows, etc etc. It's a chaotic world, and we live in an attention economy. Millions upon millions of dollars are being spent trying to get our attention. Think about that.

My advice is try again, and then let her put in some effort.
But when you do put effort, make an overture, make it something that's easy to answer, yet not generic. Don't overwhelm with words; but don't use so few that it just bounces the ball back in her court.

[Xoxocutekitty]

'What's up' sounds like a booty call.

I probably wouldn't respond either, particularly if I haven't saved your number in my phone.

'Hey, how is your evening?' Or ' do you like x, y, z' or a funny Segway from something we were talking about previously would pique my interest.

[Avicenna]

I doubt she's bothered by anything you did

[IncognitoBandito]

Maybe her interests shifted to someone else.

[ChiPaPa]

Time to move on