After a change of plans that wasn’t my intention to begin with and reassured her, she told me she didn’t want to go. She was visibly upset which I found out later was a mixture between me apparently not saying hello to her right away, and giving attention to other people besides her in a group setting. Then later in the night she was cold towards me as I tried to get her attention a few times, and after realizing she didn’t want to talk, I was talking with others. Which apparently made her even more upset. I ended up leaving shortly after for a birthday that I did invite her to, and she said that was embarrassing that I left, even though I told all her friends in the group I had to go. Then complained I didn’t stay at her house that night when I said I would because I read the vibe that she didn’t want me there. She told me I read the vibe wrong, but when I went up to her 5 min before she said we could talk about her anger later and that I’d been hanging with her friends too much.
In our chat two days later, which she’d expected me to reach out earlier, I said I was giving her space… we talked for an hour about our perspectives which seemingly went nowhere cuz she was still upset that I had a cool guy persona which was ultimately just me being friendly and having with my friend while she’s clearly upset. She said she needs time.
Not long after I apologized over text for making her feel that way, and she did the same. I assured her I come to these event to be with her ultimately, and like she mentioned we should have hangouts solo before group settings if that’s what she wants.
She also mentioned her grandma just died so she’s go a mix of emotions right now. And the convo has been very dry aside from me trying to give her as much comfort as possible while not being too pushy. I just messaged her and await her responses at this point cuz I don't know what to do? Help!
In our chat two days later, which she’d expected me to reach out earlier, I said I was giving her space… we talked for an hour about our perspectives which seemingly went nowhere cuz she was still upset that I had a cool guy persona which was ultimately just me being friendly and having with my friend while she’s clearly upset. She said she needs time.
Not long after I apologized over text for making her feel that way, and she did the same. I assured her I come to these event to be with her ultimately, and like she mentioned we should have hangouts solo before group settings if that’s what she wants.
She also mentioned her grandma just died so she’s go a mix of emotions right now. And the convo has been very dry aside from me trying to give her as much comfort as possible while not being too pushy. I just messaged her and await her responses at this point cuz I don't know what to do? Help!
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
0Opinion
If her grandma recently died, bud, cool your jets.
Keep texting her often, but small things - no heavy or big topics unless she initiaties. Send cute animal pics or fun wholesme memes you find on occasion. Don't overload.
She's gonna need time to grieve her grandma and stabilize emotionally before she can really progress a relationship. Don't push fast or hard right now, it'll backfire.
But great job communicating after the day, and getting you both to hang out solo if that's what she wants. That was the right move.
Thanks for the advice!
Last thing I said. After she told me she’s been crying all day yesterday and drinking.
“Awww I’m sorry!! You let me know if you want any company or hugs!!!”
Should I leave it at that or send her a meme at some point today? Don’t wanna try and be funny if she’s going through emotions either, but I don't know could help