Women, when ranting, do you want solutions, or just to be heard?

Question

So according to what people say online on these trendy posts going around, when a woman comes to you ranting on a personal issue, it's said that they don't want to hear a solution, they just want to rant and be heard, personally I always simple mindedly just blur out solutions and now I'm confused on what the solution to this would be, do I give solutions or just use my ear holes?

Cause in the comments it seems like many women were agreeing and it makes me think that maybe I have been doing things wrong all along 🤔

PeachyPie93 · Accepted Answer

Yes! Unless I say after my rant "what do you think I should do?" If I don't, then I just want to be listened to and maybe joke around about the situation. I learned from this guy I used to like that when I was talking about depressing things to him he always thought I was just bitching and whining and he thought I was telling him so he would give me advice. He eventually got mad at me because he said I was dumping all my baggage on him and not trying to fix anything. I honestly was just talking, not really thinking about what I was saying or that it effected him. Now I know to just keep that shit to my self and just keep a journal lol.

Account · Accepted Answer

I rant very rarely to my friends and when I do I want them to guide me through what they think is the solution or to give me another perspective that I haven't thought of in order to take that into consideration.
I feel like it broadens my horizon when I hear about different perspectives and it helps me grow.

But when I feel like they can't do anything to help me I keep my mouth shut and I keep everything inside and I try to think things from a third person view alone.

NathanDavis · Accepted Answer

be ready with both... but do listen first... do agree next then use all of your intellect and wisdom, and emotional intelligence to sneak in a solution in the form of perspective, suggested...

worldscolide · Accepted Answer

My wife wants to be heard. If she needs help she asks for it.

poochigoochi · Answer

when i rant, i want a safe space to be able to voice my thoughts without judgement. so more than getting solutions or just having someone there to hear me to nod and smile, i think it is more about actively engaging like "huh why did they do that?" "how can they do that" "wa no that is really bad", and then at the end of the rant, then the solutions and sharing can come like a "actually this happened to me before and i was so upset" or "maybe next time just ignore him..." etc

more like a gossip session without repercussions? it really is just a normal conversation but more heated...

FarAway12 · Answer

I'm very much the type of person that needs to vent to get over something. I just want to be heard so it doesn't feel like I'm talking to myself or a wall. I would rant to my ex all the time and he used to be good at listening intently until towards the end of our relationship where he went from only picking up bits and pieces, telling me I talked too much, to hardly listening at all. I wouldn't be mad at solutions, of course, and I was always open to hearing them, but sometimes you don't always fully know the situation so your input may not be valid. The effort is appreciated, though.

DishLady · Answer

Someone "ranting" technically just wants to hear themselves talk and doesn't care about feelings or feedback from others at all; tone is heated, agitated, etc.

*Speaking* and sharing a problem with your loved one or close friend is an attempt to align the facts and seek out a solution either on one's own or with feedback from the person with whom the information is being shared.

TheRealPepperPotts · Answer

My friend, you need to watch this. It will put everything into perspective. Also, this is why guys should  not  be their gal's therapist... :D

Yoursweetgirl · Answer

I want both. Like to be listened without interruptions and when I'm done talking, provide solutions.

I've met men who were like "but we provide solutions" and in reality they were interrupting me without hearing the whole story and sharing what was coming first to their mind, so that doesn't count as solution haha

MailyMartinez · Answer

for me both but it also just depends. but im not the type to like vent. but ranting on stuff i like or just being plain weird when ranting reply with like 💀. cuz i say random shit. I don't know if i made any sense

Elliegirl · Answer

I don’t want solutions. I don’t just want to be heard either. I want him to listen to me. Guys seem to always want to offer solutions. That’s not what we want. We want you to listen to us. If we want a solution, we’ll ask for one. Otherwise, just hear her out.

MemeSupreme · Answer

unless we asking for solutions SPECIFICALLY then just listen people usually know what they gotta do or literally can't do much to fix it so they're venting. we don't wanna hear what we already know

Agape93 · Answer

Ranting for rantings sake doesn't help. If I'm ranting, I'm expecting solutions or a response. If I just wanna bitch, I'll tell you in advance

electromagnetic · Answer

I rant for justification. I hope that they offer me a reasonable solution to my rant and I tend to look into their perspective if they think I may have misunderstood something.

bobalife · Answer

Most of the time we wanna be heard, which is crucial. If we want a solution, then, it comes second after being heard first.

Razp_Sorbet · Answer

Ask... Sometimes we want advice sometimes we just want to vent. Listen to what she has to say, don't interrupt.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Most men don't want solutions and don't want to hear the truth. The truth hurts insecure men like a kick to the head.

katiesmuff · Answer

You seem to have this retarded idea that it's just women with these problems.

SweetJoyGirl · Answer

Well, I want both. lol I can’t speak for other women. 😂

kylee2437 · Answer

Both. In order to get to solutions, people need to be able to hear you out and not just get into defense mode/ listening to answer. The listening to answer shit pissing me off.

PrettyCrumblBb · Answer

Just listen:

Vegasrunner · Answer

They want to be heard. The biggest mistake you can make as a man is to sit there and listen. What its better to do is to is to leave until she calms down then return when you can lead her in an emotional stable conversation.

thatshydork · Answer

I just want to be heard. If I want advice, I’ll ask for it.

midnightmoon05 · Answer

I complain sometimes… just listen. I can solve most of own problems.

Dongie · Answer

I can answer this for the "ladies". They just want the men around them to suffer. That's why they open their mouths.

Colon_Colonizer · Answer

This inspired me to troll on the topic of nagging. Had an authentic laugh at how some dumbass women got offended by this question.

Anonymous · Answer

This sums it up pretty well.

avery58 · Answer

Personally mostly just be heard

Women, when ranting, do you want solutions, or just to be heard?

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Women, when ranting, do you want solutions, or just to be heard?

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