Grammar Police: Ain't Nobody Got Time For That

[Anonymous]

Disclaimer: I am 100% certain that there will be several egregious errors in this take. Me thinks, that's the point.

Grammar police think they are God's gift to humanity. They have made it their sworn duty on earth to be life's auto-correct. They actually find it offensive that anyone would dare ignore the sworn rules of the English (or any other) language that they hold near and dear like life itself. When they correct you, they full on expect you to be grateful and accepting of their "help," even though you never asked for it or them to intrude upon your speech.

Let me tell you, if you're on GaG and you are sworn in badge carrying member of this exclusive community of grammar police, you are in for a very rude awakening. Gag is where good grammar goes to die. I dare you to scroll down the questions section and take a drink for every mistake you find (actually don't do that, as you'll surely get alcohol poisoning). Gag is an informal institution where people come to vent about their hatred of cats, or their curiosity about what's going on down there, or to ponder whether or not they should wear this pair of shoes or that one. Members aren't trying to cure the world of cancer or submitting their thesis paper for Grad school. They are using an extension of the informal speech that they would typically use with friends, but this time, it appears in writing.

The GP are doing absolutely nothing to turn the dial for the betterment of humanity at large by sweeping through GaG and pointing out errors. Do they or others think people truly care if their surgeon correctly uses 'their' or 'there' every single time, or if the police officer defending their life, used a double negative when trying to tell them to get out of the way? Uh, no. The GP try and make it seem as if comprehension and language can only be understood if it is written down perfectly within the rules and boundaries that they have come to understand with a level of permanence that is unyielding, despite the fact that the rules of grammar and language are fluid and change with the times.

People know grammar has its place and so do the GP. One must first learn the rules (in order to break them) in school. It is also important when communicating for educational/work purposes to use correct grammar. This is where the GP can and should shine. Correct away! Step outside of this box however, and the GP become utterly useless in their need to correct everyone and everything. The GP conveniently like to ignore the value of comprehension and assume that something cannot be understood unless it is written in prefect English. How is it, I wonder, so many can understand something when not written or said this way if correct grammar is so incredibly important to the functioning of the world?

The truth is, for a GP member to admit that comprehension has the same if not more value than correct grammar, would mean an absolute shattering of their world and the principals they live by. It would take away their presumed power to wield the rules of language like a sword. There would be no use for them to troll comments looking for errors or to point things out matter-factually to friends. It would be as if you just declared one plus one can actually equal six, and they'll not have that. They revel in their ability to annoy others with their presumed talent. They think it makes them valuable or perfect in some way. Although they may point out errors all day in others, when they make a mistake, it's viewed simply as a strange anomaly and not the glaring grammar destroying error meant to topple the very structures of humanity that they make it seem that it is in correcting others.

Brilliant people can have bad grammar. Some dumb people can be good at math. Grammar on it's own, or grammar found on the internet/text messages, are not an indication of someone's actual IQ level. Typing fast, willfully ignoring the rules in informal settings with friends/family, auto-correct incorrectly correcting your "errors," making common grammatical errors...all these things happen...and so what. That person may not follow the rules as the GP knows them, but despite all of that, if the people reading and interacting can understand what someone has written/said, and communication is allowed to happen, there really is no issue.

People are still on GaG and other places where they are able to easily communicate despite the 1,000's of errors typed or said every second on this site or out in the real world. That, my GP friends, is what gets under your skin more than anything in life and there is nothing you can do about it. I mean, how dare us be able to still communicate and understand others just fine while ignoring a majority of the rules!

[anewgirl]

The badge made me laugh so hard. I'll admit to being a bit of a grammar nazi.

[myTake Owner]

Well let me ask you then, why it is you may find it incredibly important to correct others even in informal non-work/school settings? What is the purpose, because from my experience of being corrected in informal settings and witnessing those around me who've had it happen to them, it does nothing but annoy people and no one is ever like, you know what, thanks, I needed to hear you interrupt me to say that.

[anewgirl]

I don't. I just think it. 👍

[myTake Owner]

Ah, then you are no tried and true Grammar Nazi. You're more of the civilized sort who keep it to themselves rather than decide that they 'have to' correct everyone and everything, including perfect strangers.

[anewgirl]

I guess so. I certainly would never correct a stranger. I kind of can't believe anyone would do that. 😂

[myTake Owner]

I've seen it. The guy was like WTF! Who are you? I thought he was going to fight the other guy. That aside, you are a stranger to me. I don't know you. If I were to now sit here and go through your comments with a fine tooth comb and point out all the errors, that too is a Grammar Police move. You didn't ask me to, and you don't know me. It would be really rude to just intrude like that, especially like some, with the presumption that you are an incapable twit who knows nothing about the English language because you made an error or three. I can understand if the work looks like it's written in a foreign language, but to point out a few errors and beat someone about the head with it like they are a child, is just those people being an arse.

[anewgirl]

Yeah I agree with you. Like I said, it all goes through my head, but never comes out my mouth unless of course the person asks me to check for errors.

[myTake Owner]

and the world thanks you for that :)

[Richareens]

I fucking love your article 😂 Thanks so much for the laugh!

[Iron_Man]

You tell them girl I'll be your Enforcer