Asking Do Men... Or Do Women... Questions Is Not The Best Way To Get Real Answers...

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

For anyone that answers/reads a lot of my posts, maybe you've noticed, or maybe not 🤷🏼‍♀️ a lot of my questions are worded as "Do you think" or 'Have you" or "Would you". And there's a reason for that. This way, I'm getting real answers, opinions, beliefs of/from that individual.

But, when you ask the other way: Do Men or Do Women you are asking someone to speak for all men or all women. And how can they do that?

Just because I'm a female, that does not make me an authority on "All" females, because 'All" females are not the same.

That's why, when I do answer questions like that, I make sure to say that I can only speak for myself. Not all women behave the same, not all women want the same things out of life, or a relationship, or a man. And those that do answer what women want, well those aren't really answers, they're assumptions. You're assuming to know all women just because you're a female. And that could be very misleading...

And the same, goes for men. Not all men share the same values, beliefs, characteristics just because they're men. You can't speak for all men, you can only speak for yourself. Not all stereotypes are right.

And do you want false, misleading answers based on stereotypical beliefs, or do you want real honest answers about how people really feel.

The best way to find out about people, get the answers you're searching for is to ask more individual specific questions. That's the best way to understand that what makes people the same sometimes is their beliefs and way of thinking not their gender.

Individuality is something we need to embrace. I don't want to be lumped in with other females just because we are of the same gender. My thoughts, opinions, beliefs are mine individually based off the character of who I am and my life experiences. Some people may share some of the same views and beliefs, but may not share all. And that is as it should be

When you answer a person's question, you should speak from your own thoughts and experiences. And remember that just because you think or feel that way, that doesn't make it fact that that's how all men/women think, act, feel.

And also know:

Trying to insult or make others look bad usually results in just making yourself look that way.

"Brainsbeforebeauty"😘

[DanaeAdam5]

Honestly I couldn't agree more.

All the things that you mentioned are the reasons why I never make my questions specifically for one gender, and feel weird every time that I am invited in a question that starts with "Do girls" Or "Girls have/are you" and things like that.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I know, that's why like answering your questions 🙂🙂

[DanaeAdam5]

Thanks hun :)

And that's one of the main reasons why I like to answer you questions too 😊

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thanks ♥️🤗

[DanaeAdam5]

Thanks for MHO :)

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

💜🤗

[Liam_Hayden]

Thank you for this. Hopefully this will seriously lower the number of times I feel compelled to lecture people on the fallacy of the Sweeping Generalization.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Omg thank you.. Couldn't agree more

[Lliam]

All I can say is, I agree. A person can't speak for anyone but their self.
That being said, people do have some commonalities. And there are some things that are generally unique to both genders.

This reminded me of an argument that developed between me and some girl on GAG once. I forget the exact topic. I had made a comment and she said "Women don't like that." I knew for a fact that many did. I accused her of speaking for all women and she insisted that she absolutely did speak for all women. She had some kind of radical feminist POV. It was laughable really.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Lol funny... And yes there's some commonalities, but even those can be different. All women get a period, but it doesn't affect all women the same. All women get menopause, but it doesn't affect all women the same. I've had men act like they know more about menopause than me who's going through it. There's too much false stereotypes out there. Not all menopausal women get moody, fat and don't want sex anymore. I've been a year in, and I'm losing weight, high sex drive.. If not having sex it's not because of menopause it's because no partner. Point is even though women go through some of the same things, they can still go through it differently. And I'm sure it's the same with men, it maybe not I don't know I'm not a man lol 🤣

[Lliam]

True. Generalities are just that. They don't apply to single person.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Exactly

[TCredo]

Yet another outstanding one here Toots. When I hear someone make a broad "Everyone" or "All" etc... I often will say "I'll take you to court on that and there is no way you can prove it lol... I just need to find one person who doesn't agree etc.

So very well said - it's always best to not speak for others... you can phrase it as "I think most folks... " whatever... or "From what I've seen... "etc... which is similar to "in my opinion"... "Everyone thinks" which is a presenting it as an absolute fact... Everyone is entitled to their own opinion but not their own facts - just make sure you state your opinion as your own :)

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Very true and well said... Think you might get another visit from Al bot😁🙂

[TCredo]

Wait... what? Toots... you... are... the... AI... bot? :)

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Heck no lol 😆

[TCredo]

Ah ha! That's to the power of Google, this makes perfect sense now... there are these Transformers called BotBots... rearrange the letters and your get Toots BB :)

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Lol 😂

[TCredo]

AI is overrated... Toots the CV and YC Bot is the best! :)

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

You saying I'm like a robot in bed... Cuz yeah you'd be wrong there 😝🤣🤣

[TCredo]

lol... no no no... that thought has never been in my thoughts... remember I've shared how I have a part of my brain that is filled with HD quality memories of experiences I've enjoyed? Well, it also does a wonderful job of creating scenes. So I know you are not a robot in bed lol :)

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

👍👍🙂

[ecfresh]

But all men gather together and we decide collectively how to frustrate women :P


Yes, like you when I answer a gender based inquiry I try to carefully state that ‘in general my men think or do something this way; as you said nothing is universal to all men or all women. However I do get the questions because there are patterns and tendencies depending on gender, age, economics etc..


Yes, when someone asks a more specific question and I can rely on personal experience to answer or assist that’s the best way. It’s more genuine, the other person can rely on the answer more because it’s personal. Yes we are all individuals and the best advice comes from someone who has faced and conquered the challenge.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Gather together huh... That's why men leave the toilet seat up 🤔🤔😂
Seriously tho, great reply ♥️🙂

[Lliam]

Uh oh. The jig is up, ecfresh. She's onto our great male conspiracy. By tomorrow, the word will have spread throughout the great female conspiracy network. LOL

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@Lliam 😂😂😂 too late just had our all women meeting 😂

[ecfresh]

Yes I did catch that game, Jeter scored 3 touchdowns and was 14/18 greens in regulation

Ok, now the sports cover will prevent the women from reading below..

Brother @Lliam yes it’s on our agenda tonight. We will discuss mitigation strategies. Also on the agenda is:

- video games - more guys need to join the efforts so that their partners feel neglected

- no approaching women - we need to remind our good looking guys to continue to ignore the women they think are attractive, make them come to us first

- Dutch ovens - tutorial on how to bring the heat under the covers.

- becoming more indecisive - teaching our junior members how to make less decisions so women continue to increase frustration.

- mother in laws - of course every guy secretly adores and craves attention from their MIL, gotta keep pretending to avoid them to maintain the tension between our women and her mom

Same Bat place, same Bat time

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

😂😂😂 Dutch oven lmao

[Lliam]

@ecfresh. ROFL
Great agenda. I'll be there for the meeting, as usual.
I also want to encourage previously agreed behaviors like drinking straight out of containers in the frig and leaving items on the counter.

[ecfresh]

Measure 3/4 inch spaces with the electric saw and be sure to change the oil using the ladder in the garage next to the roller

@Lliam bro gotta remember to start our No Ma’am (Al Bundy reference) secret messages with content to bore the women in case they are nosy.. well we know from last years meeting they are nosy based on the fact finding mission and the sacrifice of those 3 brave dads.

Ha ha, great points you bring up., the counter/container subsection of the best practices were created a few years ago and go alongside the leaving dirty clothes on the floor and not remembering to sweep our nail clippings into the trash.

Lol glad these discussions are buried into the replies; we appear safe so far from the GaG police and can use satire — thank God :)

[Lliam]

@ ecfresh
Free from the GAG police, yes. You're clever ploy also seems to have thrown our female friend off of our scent. Either that or she is remaining silent in order to lull us into a false sense of security while taking notes to report to the women's meeting later. :O

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@Lliam 👁️👁️👂👂 lmao

[Lliam]

Oh crap!!! Busted.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@Lliam that's okay lol I'll still a few secrets from our meeting...
-men's dirty clothes on floor-women just refold and put back in drawer or rehang
-mail clippings can be ground up in food processor and added to food for extra flavor 😇🤣🤣🤣
Ok, can't give all secrets away 🤐🤣🤣🤣

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

*spill
*Nail clippings

[Lliam]

NO!!!
I had no idea. This knowledge could lead to escalation from passive aggression to all out war.
Except I'm afraid that the women would win. Angry women are mean and scary as hell. 🤣
P. s. I'm going to start having my wife taste all of my food before I eat it.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@Lliam 🤣🤣🤣 you all started it lol

[Lliam]

Fair enough. What's scary, though, is that guys are too clueless to realize how devious women and their secret cabal can be. 🤣
I'm terrified of what else you gals are up to. I surrender. 🤣🤣🤣

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@Lliam okay truce 🏳️🏳️😁 but how was dinner... Tasty 🤣🤣🤣

[JackSmy]

The best part of GAG, is getting different opinions from different women!!!
I ask something and some have experienced that, and say what their experience was like! Others HATE IT!! And they say something about their experience!
I haven't had very many ladies, in my life, and I am VERY biased, as to the ones I choose, so it is nice to get a more DIVERSE, and "REAL" overview of what others think!!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Okay but everyone should speak for themselves just cuz I'm a woman and I less something or don't don't mean all do... Do when ask Do Women like... When it should be women do You like... See what I'm saying

[JackSmy]

@Brainsbeforebeauty I am TOTALLY confused by your response, seriously! I said nothing about thinking less of women, and I don't!!
Every woman on here seems to speak for herself, her own way, and I like reading their various ideas, feelings, and how they deal with various relationship things, as posted here.
I am very confused with your response, it is not clear to me, what you are trying to say. Please explain, privately if you prefer.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Where did I say you did... I was just exampling the difference between the way people so ask and answer questions on here.. Men who think they speak for all men or women who think they know what all women think... So where did I say you think less of women 🤷🏼‍♀️I didn't

[JackSmy]

@Brainsbeforebeauty I don't want this to get confused, and seem like I am judging or you perceive insults! I was responding to this post:

"Okay but everyone should speak for themselves just cuz I'm a woman and I less something or don't don't mean all do... Do when ask Do Women like... When it should be women do You like... See what I'm saying"

That is confusing to me, and I don't know what you mean, and that is what I am asking about, NOT judging, not condemning, in any way!
Maybe type-o's or mis-types, but confusing.

[Yads_Is_Back]

Awesome!

Wish people would do this for real. You’re so right! It especially annoys me when people do generalize it and when you correct them and say it’s not true of all women or whatever it is, they absolutely insist, which is basically them talking to you but denying you’re existence at the same time 😂some people are just so brain-lacking lol
Anyways, awesome post 👍🏼

[Yads_Is_Back]

I just realized this was from two months ago. Looks like stupid people still rule GAG then. Holy shizz

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Aww if you wouldn't of replied two mouths late... You'd a got MHO-but still MHO in my book, just minus xper points 💙❤️🤗

[ret04]

I think the question is valid no matter which way it is presented, it's still a survey in the end, and I think people generally understand that a survey is not scientifically approved method of obtaining a fact.

Whether you're probing individual people for a personalized answer, or just asking for a vote, yay or nay. X amount will say yes, and X amount will say no. Neither is more correct or incorrect.

You could take away the same supposition from either type of question, because neither will give you the correct answer when there is no correct answer. Most said no, so this is probably not what girls like... is a reasonable supposition to make. But it's not fact, and still won't apply to everyone.

I think you're getting that same information no matter how you phrase the question.

[Jjpayne]

This makes sense, that's why you can just look at one opinion but the majority but also knowing to one person of that gender that thinks differently can oddly at times be helpful too 🤔 great my take! 😊

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thank you!! 🙂🙂

[PBandJ_Nerd]

I usually give my perspective but sometimes I'll give a little bit of a view from how others might be (or whatever it is). I just try to be more open minded.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

But perspective can be seen as assumption tho... We can't really know how all females feel... And we can give perspective on periods and other things, but even that.. All women get periods, but it doesn't affect all women the same... Some get horrible cramps, some get little to none... There's men that think they know more about, Menopause than me, a female going through it, based off generalizations and assumptions... All menopausal females gain weight, get super moody and don't want sex anymore.. And none of that is true in my case... Cuz it affects every woman differently, hot flashes are real tho 🙄 lolol

[PBandJ_Nerd]

I can see how though. I didn't experience cramps until I was like, 14 on my period. 2 years of my first periods I didn't though (12 and 13). But my period symptoms are just crazy in general. I know I've heard that sometimes on menopause if a person has low sex drive, that they can take a pill to boost both estrogen and testosterone. But that's only if they have that problem. I find it odd how men say that women won't have sex after a certain age because I've heard stories of women who are in their 40s and 50s and they still have a healthy sex life (that they love).

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Exactly!! That's the whole point why we can't generalize... We're all different, we may go through some of the same things but go through them differently and handle them differently... Hope your period evens out some... Thank God I'm past that... One plus of menopause 👍🙂

[PBandJ_Nerd]

My period actually turned regular when I turned 20 years. old (I'm 21 now though). But the problem was that I worried since I wasn't getting my period as usual that something was wrong. Nobody ever told me at 20 years. old that my body would change like that so I didn't know. Plus, I started wondering why I always had a high sex drive on my period since we never discussed that in high school health class. I sort of figured it out by myself as to "why" too. I was just glad I was experiencing normal/regular periods.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

That's good.. Yeah they don't always explain things like they should...

[PBandJ_Nerd]

There's a bunch of stuff that happens. Like your sense of smell can heighten, your body odor can increase, you may not be able to eat any junk food (body doesn't want you to), sex drive increases or decreases, etc.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

That's true, same for pregnancy... my boobs got so tender, couldn't take bra off without crying in pain, got to point would shower with bra on and wash each one then out fresh bra on after shower... Couldn't Eat condiments like ketchup or mustard

[PBandJ_Nerd]

ouch! That sounds like horrible pain!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Yeah it was, that's how knew my daughter was pregnant, Hers got the same way

[zagor]

You could add the "Do purple guys like vermilion women" and the "Is it OK for an x year old to date a y year old" questions to the why-do-you-bother category.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Lolol

[Ninjazzed]

Life is different for everybody, regardless of gender. You’ll always get at least a slightly different answer.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Exactly!!! These questions "Do women like sex" some do, some don't... How the hell do I know what the next female wants sexually, I only know for myself 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Yourfriend2021]

People keep trying to group all women and all men into one category on GAG. Some people keep trying to divide genders. That's why this site can be so toxic.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Exactly!!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Exactly!! .

[Yourfriend2021]

At least someone else can see that :)

[IronmanT]

I have niticed. And you are rite. Its all opinion and not set in stone asto a RITE ANSWER.. therefor there is no rite or wrong, just ones understanding and reaction to said question

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

True true 👍🙂

[ThatGuy133]

Yea I’ve always wondered why people ask questions like that and take it as gospel. Like one guy (or gal) answers for their particular gender

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Right... And people get misinformed that way. I've had guys think they know more about menopause then me a female actually going through it lol ask women don't handle menopause the same have the same symptoms any more than a menstrual cycle. All women get, but the symptoms, affects can be different per person.

[ThatGuy133]

Exactly. It’s just laziness and naïveté

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Well said friend 🙂🙂

[AviatorTom]

At work, we have an informal rule when we deal with customers who have asked us to build something for them. Rather than ask them what they want, we tell them what we plan on giving them. That almost always gets a better response than asking... because they tell us what they like, and don't like about what we are proposing.

[Unit1]

"When you answer a person's question, you should speak from your own thoughts and experiences. And remember that just because you think or feel that way, that doesn't make it fact that that's how all men/women think, act, feel."

Hence why i asked 10 questions if women actually love men or do they love men primarily for their money. Of course exceptions exist but still.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

But you listen to what men say women are like than going by own personal experiences... Some women will burn you.. Some men will burn you. Some people period will burn you..

[Unit1]

Right. I know several women, who aren't with men for their money and make their own.

But the more I see rich & powerful (old) men snagging all the beauties, the more I can't help but subscribe to that stereotype.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Oh it happens but in both sides of that cin as well. There's men that try to play/life off females, but that's hardly even mentioned as much 🤔 Why is that 🤔

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

*on both sides of the coin

[Unit1]

Them gigolos? The ratio between the gigolos and gold diggers is vastly out of balance. I don't know the figures but I'd say approximately for 10 gold diggers out there there is 1 gigolo. Depending on the region. In poor countries there are even way less gigolos.

What does not happen as very often as the other way around is not going to be talked about much.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Really, 🤔 okay

[Unit1]

Sometimes i wonder if i had a girlfriend and she would go to a café with her friends (maybe with you too) for tea, cake and usual chit chat, would she say something like "my boyfriend is so obsessed with money. He talks a lot about money and it's power and how women love it. He thinks money is everything and that everything is about the money 💵"?

😀😀😀

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

"women love money" really? And even if they do? Don't you? See the double standard there.,🤔

[Unit1]

Don't we all love money? But the bigger question is whether we do something to get more of it. There's just saying so (or lying) and then there's making money 💵

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

It's too early to listen to how all women are gold diggers or lie about using people for money.. Funny tho, the men that "offer" women money thinking that's a way to impress them. So who's really making it about the money in that situation 🤔

[Unit1]

Yes, you are absolutely right on this Ms. Brains! I have said so myself at some point, that men influenced women with their money (shame on me if I do the same and then get gold diggers - didn't happen yet :) ). And that leads to a mutual miserable outcome as in men being the leaders and women being the followers - If he leads and makes everything about the money (s**t, do I sound like me now?) for the woman, the woman naturally follows *his* lead - the money, finances, resources, wealth, business...
I still remember that dialog with "redeyemindtricks" from here -> Ladies! Do you hate it when men think, that women want money? ↗

HOWEVER!!! There are really fantastic women out there like this one:

https://youtu.be/V_coqZk2Dvw

That's the kind of girl I wanna make my long term girlfriend: financially independent, successful, super nice (she's even sweeter than stevia!) and not shallow at all. I'm always ready for women like her and could spend my time (NOT money!!! unless of course the activities cost money) 24/7 with her.

"It's too early to listen to how all women are gold diggers or lie about using people for money"

Ok, so when's the time to listen to that Ms. triple-B if not now?

[Unit1]

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

But then a woman's money can excite you... You're way too obsessed about money, yours, theirs... 🤷🏼‍♀️ And that video proves my point... Some women are gold digger, some aren't... I already knew that, tho 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Unit1]

my survival depends on the money since i was born. The food, The clothes, the gadgets, the perfume, the experiences, the medical services - I had none of it until I was already a grown bearded man. I do not want women's money. I want them to be successful and financially independent (like that girl in the video or Ariana Grande). I question how aren't more people obsessed about money? it's everything.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Really? Money can't buy back your health if you have a terminal illness 🤔 money can't tuck you in and take care of you when you're sick... Money won't comfort you as you lay dying. .

[Unit1]

"Money can't buy back your health if you have a terminal illness"

But it can buy drugs to get over it for as long as I have the money - and as long as there's a drug dealer or the hospital can supply and administrate those.

"money can't tuck you in and take care of you when you're sick..."

I can pay someone my money to do that for me.

"Money won't comfort you as you lay dying"

Poverty makes it only worse. At least with the money in my arms I know I lived the right way and made the right choices.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

To each their own... For you money trumps everything... For me, love trumps money... But how do you think any potential partner will feel if she knows you'll always love the money over her. . And then, how would you feel if your partner said she loves you but she loves money more?

[Unit1]

I'm very good at concealing my obsession over money and my partner will know only if I screw up on my part. It won't get this far. Unless she's bloodhound (is highly potent in women's 6. th sense of being very observant and expertized in tracking) or a very skilled spy. Or finds and stalks me here on GAG, where I want to pour out my honesty from time to time.

However this can't go completely concealed either. For example my coworkers want to gift someone in our company a birthday gift or a wedding gift and most of us agree to share the price. I did mention 1-2 times to not let it burn a hole into my bank account (and nobody else said so). The problem is I personally really couldn't afford that with my salary and living alone conditions.

Yes, money trumps everything for me. But I am not completely immoral. While yes, I am "evil" because I love money like the successful businessmen and businesswomen do, I am still homo sapiens and do really love. I love women and my dog, who I haven't seen in 2 years - he wouldn't survive here where I am. They can't be replaced with money. I'm not Mr. Eugene Krabs from Spongebob Squarepants.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

🤣🤣 funny I always thought more Ebenezer Scrooge 😜🤣

[Unit1]

When women ask me "What do you like to do on your freetime?"

https://youtu.be/CSEw_AVfJBY

Just kidding. 😂

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Nah that's you 🤣

[Unit1]

Oh, bonk off... ;)
Just let me at them.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

🤣🤣🤣

[NYCQuestions1976]

I always give real answers because I'm a pillar in this community and morale for the masses.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

That's a good thing 👍🙂

[scooogy]

I often tend to generalize things in order to not stick with particular situations in case they might be slightly different next time.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

You can generalize a situation, can't generalize people

[love_conquers_lust]

You might want to take that up with the creepy diversity foreign CEO owner of this site who named it Girls Ask Guys.

If you want to take an egalitarian approach, sure. I would definitely recommend that when it comes to personally getting to know someone. But for quick and dirty feedback here, I say be as racist and sexist as you want. I like the challenge of sifting through the bull shit. Stereotypes aren't usually born out of nothing.

[apollo3000]

Yes, entirely. A person's a person, both genders have their baddies and their good ones

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

EXACTLY!! Thank you! 🙂

[COMMODOREII]

Hmmmm i might have to give this some genuine thought. Hmmmm

Nah!! Lol
I like it. 😂

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thanks 🤗🤗