Loneliness (A short myTake)

[MikeyTheRebel]

Loneliness not only puts you at more risks for mental disorders such as depression, it raises the risks of premature death and even disease. This isn't however a myTake about the symptoms of Loneliness and depression, this is more of a myTake allowing me to experience some catharsis. For some time now, I have realized that yes I am lonely. What's even more crazy is that I want to be even more alone after realizing this. I have severed connections with some of my friends and I don't really feel like going to social gatherings either. There's just something about being around people who express their happiness excessively that gets to me, how can they not recognize that I'm not happy? How do they not see that I feel truly alone even in the presence of others? Then I realize that I can't blame them for being happy but rather blame myself for pretending to be happy around them. So I retreat into seclusion and I let my thoughts rage on; I see happy couples but in contrast I see old lonely people walking around with their heads down. I think to myself "what if I end up like that?", maybe I need to find her before she finds me. Then I contradict myself and I wonder what it would be like to let it all just happen and fall in place instead of "forcing" it, so in essence I feel helpless. I feel as if I have no power to control my own happiness. The loneliness leads to depression and I wonder why me, I wonder why I can't just help myself out of this situation. Maybe it's failure that stops me in my tracks. Being told I would only be a failure by my middle school peers, maybe the bullying led me to this state of mind. Maybe being the social outcast in high school reared me up to think like this, who should I even blame; society or myself? Maybe just maybe it's the fear of rejection, nah maybe it's being disappointed time after time by the females you take a chance on. Whatever it is, being alone certainly won't help me find the answer... But how can you help it when this loneliness is something you're so used to?

Have a great day guys.

[flirtygirl247]

Loneliness is not a bad thing if you truly don't mind being alone. I think that you don't want to be lonely, but you can't help it. The only advice that I can give you is to talk to someone that you can really trust about this. I think you would feel a lot better if you did go out more though. Even if you aren't truly happy at first, I think that it's better to fake it until you become it then sit back and watch all your friends live a happy life.

[MikeyTheRebel]

I might try going out more, I have a close friend of mine but he accepts being lonely. I don't think I can discuss my feelings with him because he's on another level with this being alone thing. He really doesn't mind it at all. But you're right, I don't think I want to watch my friends be happy while I'm not.