Why do all guys when I show interest back off?


my dating life has been miserable. I ve noticed that there is a pattern...

First, guys hit on me and they think I am challenge. In the begiining I am alittle and I tease them, but I stop with that behaviour very quickly and show interest, like asking them out etc., they do it before as well.

Few years ago, I had a few dates with a guy, nothing serious happened. After the first kiss he became distant and always rejected me whn I asked him out. After few weeks silence, he contacted me agin, but I was already over it. We are friends now, and he admitted that he was really into me back then, but wasn't sure about my intentions.
I suppose he backed off to test me or because he was insecure? Guys just don't understand that with this behaviour they loose the girl.

This year: I travelled 5 h to a guy that I met on the internet. He was very keen to meet me and wrote me all the time to visit him. When I was there it seemed to go well, but I rejected his sexual advances. Well we kissed etc, but I didn't want to go further physically. He got very distanced after that. He was either insecure and felt rejected or he just wanted sex.
he didn't reply to my email and when I asked again he said he didn't like the date and he thought I felt the same... he even deleted me from fb few months ago. I had stopped any contact with him, because he told me, that he didn't want to see me. So i suppose he was just not into me?

also this years: guy with girlfriend. I made clear that I am not going to have anything with him physically. nevertheless, he textd me all the time, but I remained distanced. We also met up a few times. The last few times, i told him to stop with the writing or to meet up if he wants me. I showed signs that I was interested. What happened, he backed off.

this year on holidays: Guy was very interested in me, very touchy, but he respected me and didn't even try to kiss me, but there was heavy flirting and he toook my hands etc. In the beginning I acted a little disintersted, I didn't let him touch me too much etc, because I wanted to feel confortable before. I alswo left always so early. The last evening, he didn't want to meet me, he ignored my messages evne though I sent a few and showed him that I wanted to meet.

What am I doing wrong? most of these guys sooner or later return and text again. Am I showing them mixed signs?
Or are they simply jerks and insecure guys?
+1 y
last year same problem:

I added guy fro work on fb. He seemed very interested and texted every day. I always texted back and texted him too. He waited few weeks to ask me out, but with him and his friend in a club which I found weird. I am a shy person and went to the club last minute. He asked with me not even 2 min, he smiled and leaned forward and I smiled back. Then he went away and asked the whole time with a girl. I didn't go to him agin. He stopped contacting me.
+1 y
Later he told me that he thought that I was playing games, because I didn't go to him again. wtf? I felt rejected because he was talking to another girl all the time and I didn't go to him for that reason.

are these guys insecure people who need girls that show very clear signs?
Do I send them mixed signals? I am shy myself and sometimes insecure, but I seem to attract guys that are also insecure and shy?
Why do all guys when I show interest back off?
3 Opinion