Do men really mean it if they say, "I do miss you"

[Anonymous]

Despite the fact that we don't see each other any more he let me know this. We were just friends. He moved away. There was nothing between us.

What level of meaning should I take from this if anything? Why would he even bother to mention it? I'm pulling up the contact plug from my end as distance has broken our ability to connect and be friends.

[santia90]

he's carrying a torch for you my dear...from personal experience just hanging out with the opposite sex for any amount of time and you are not dating but are just "friends" means the other party has strong feelings for you and wants to be more than just friends...the only time this isn't so is when the other party is gay.

Do with this info what you will..but my guess is he genuinely misses you.

[Asker]

I'm working on the premise here that if the words meant anything to him, that he would have called more than once in a month or arranged a visit. He's only an hour or so away. That speaks louder to me than his words...Perhaps though it may be harder for him to pull away if he does call etc. What is your opinion on that?

[santia90]

Assuming I am right then, and he does have feelings for you...the fact he never made a move while he was still close by is very telling. Why do you think he probably never said anything when he lived near you? were you in other relationships at the time?

Also, lets keep on assuming he does have feelings for you...why do you want to know? do you have feelings for him in return?

[Asker]

Thanks for answer. We are of different religion and culture so can't get "involved". My rules. He knew that. Enjoyed talking to each other at work, bantering back and forth, checking on each others lives. Friend stuff. He'd get moody if I talked about my other guy friends though (they're just friends also) so I avoided the topic. I miss the day to day stuff with him. I didn't think, him being a man, that he'd actually miss me. Does that help explain things a bit. Please ask more if need be.

[santia90]

Friendship between a man and a woman can only go so far...seeing as how there is no future beyond that for the two of you, the fact you haven't spoken in a while...i'm guessing he has finally come to realize that himself... and your instinct to cut all communication probably the best thing for both of you.

[Asker]

Thanks for your perceptive answers. I'm ok with that (cutting ties) just still a bit curious why he would e-mail me the other day about missing me if he's trying to cut it off?

[santia90]

My guess is to at least let you know you meant something to him...I'd think of it more as a way of saying good bye..