Guys, why do you shake hands really lightly with girls?

[Anonymous]

At church every week my pastor tells us to say hi to people around us before we sit down and so every Sunday I turn to the people behind me and in front of me and we shake hands and say good morning. I notice that almost every single time guys I shake hands with do it so lightly. They basically just hold my hand for a second and let go instead of really shaking my hand. I don't mind, but I wondered why do guys do that and do they do it to every girl or not?

[1Analyst]

Some morons may think that this is sexism fully at work. But i call this Bullsh*t ! Most guys have an understanding that the firmness of the handshake is appropriate to the relationship with that person. And most guys realize that most girls are NOT comfortable with some random dude just hugging her as if he KNOWS her. It's the same with handshakes! So a light handshake for women you don't know, a firm handshake for a woman you know and lastly-the man's other hand covering the handshake, this means that he is REALLY close to this person.

[mik3y81]

A handshake is a strange thing because it needs to be performed by two people. It can feel really solid, or really wishy-washy (like the ones guys give you).

How are your handshakes? If yours are good, strong handshakes, I wouldn't worry about guys handshakes to you. If you have a small hand, they may just be trying not to crush it. If you give them a good solid handshake, they may be likely to remember that and give you a better handshake in the future.

Don't you just hate those "dead fish" handshakes?

[Asker]

I suppose my hands are a lot smaller than theirs, But I will give a better handshake next time because normally my handshakes are those "dead fish" ones haha

[mik3y81]

A bad handshake isn't all your fault. But if you a distributor of dead fish, then try brushing up on your clasping skills. I hope you get some good handshakes next weekend.

[Asker]

Thanks!

[Browneyes33]

Because it's they do! It's polite! Guys shake guys hands firm to show they are a man. They shake girls hands softer because they aren't trying to show you how tough they are, they want to show they are a gentalman. :) and ladies skakes guys hands soft because they want to show how they are a lady. :)

[Anonymous]

I noticed that too then I always feel really manly because I didn't grow up with females and I learned to shake hands like a man lol

[Mesonfielde]

Because they think your hands are fragile due to being female, I guess.

[Polocrossebob]

Ok, I think this is probably because we dont want to crush your hand, but aren't sure of an appropriate level of grip to be engaging, respectful, and considerate as most guys have a naturally stronger handshake. It might just be that its a limp fish handshake, but I am thinking this isn't all guys. Personally, I would like to think that I have found that zone where I can give a good handshake to girls or women with whom I have met, while also being able to use my strength when shaking hands with a guy. It does take practice to find that zone though.

[TadCurious]

I was taught to shave hands with a girl just like you would with a guy with one change: You don't grip a girl's hand as hard. That's just basic courtesy 'cause most guys' hands are bigger and stronger than most girls' hands. So there's a sweet spot between death grip force and wet spaghetti.

[TadCurious]

*shake not shave LOL :)

[MeltedCheese89]

Because we've been trained from a really young age to think of all girls as "weaker" than us and as these frail, delicate little things who can barely stand on their own two feet, let alone do something as active as shake a hand with a "real man" like us.

So when we shake hands, it tends to be a gentle thing because we don't want to "hurt" you by shaking your hand too hard or something.

So basically, what it comes down to is sexism.

[SoWhAt249]

We, guys, want to be gentle when making physical contact with girls...

[ElvenMr]

I think it's cause it's not polite to strongly shake a girls hands, at least that's how i know and even rude to be the initiator in this, so unless the girl wants to shake hands, it's rude to initiate a handshake.

[ArtDent]

That's how we are taught. Not only lightly, but different. The female is to offer her hand palm down and the male is to hold it. In some cases, to kiss he hand.

[AlexCab]

I don't actually, I shake hands with everyone the same way.

[NYkid27]

Because most girls have very soft and little hands so I'm afraid that I'll hurt them a little bit if I give them a normal handshake

[ZionOrtov]

Hell no, I a firm handshaker for everyone but old or injured, or really young people.

[Intraluminal]

Basically guys don't want to hurt your hand.

[Anonymous]

I shake hands firmly like a man lol