My boyfriend doesn't put much thought into my birthdays. Help?

[AndiieRush]

So I've been thinking about this for a while now and i know I'm gonna sound selfish and entitled but I've seen that lots of other girls kinda have the same issue.

I've been dating my boyfriend for exactly a year now and i know its not that long for it to be an important issue but hear me out. My bday is in January and we met in December so exactly after we met my birthday is up. I'm not the type of person who likes to celebrate my birthdays but at least a single "happy birthday" is enough for me. Last year i had told him a few times when my birthday is coming up. He forgot and its understandable and just said happy birthday and went about his day. This year i had told him a few other times when my birthday was and even if i don't seem like its an important date for me i would really appreciate if he even remembered it and did something special (even the smallest thing) and everytime i mentioned it he would act distant and try to change the subject.

Every year i remember his birthday and i try to make him feel special even if he doesn't like his birthdays and no im not doing it to expect something in return. I do it cause i love him and I'm so grateful for everything he's done for me and he's one of the sweetest guys when you get to know him. He really loves me, i believe that and even if sometimes he can act like an insensitive ass he means so much to me. But i dont get why he acts like this when i mention my birthday at all cause with other dates like new years, valentines, and Christmas he always does something special or gives me something.

Like i said i dont except an expensive present or a birthday card or a freaking big party. All i want is for him to at least acknowledge the day i was born and it hurts that he just changes the subject and completely ignores the thought of it.

What do you guys think? Your opinion means a lot :3

[jp612612]

This is completely normal. There are very few sub-25 year olds and I'm guessing nearly zero sub 20-year old males who are good at this. Unfortunately, this is just the way things are unless you pick a new boyfriend. The nanny I hire is 19 and a few months ago, she and her boyfriend were celebrating their 1-year anniversary. She was soooooo excited, but I've met the guy (he's a really nice guy), but the guy is clearly a young, self-centered guy like most of them are. The next week, I asked her how the anniversary went and she was really disappointed as to how it all played out. She was under the impression that he was planning something big, but it ended up that he just picked her up and took her to some place where they met up with a bunch of his guy friends. The thing is, I knew she was getting her hopes up too much because at that age, it's just not how things play out.

So yeah, this isn't to say that there aren't guys your age who will take things like birthdays and anniversaries seriously, but to do that, you have to have empathy and be way less self-centered. That's just not common with young guys.

[AndiieRush]

i guess that makes sense... thanks for the opinion :3

[truthbeknown]

Sorry, didn't read your story, but I think you are expecting too much from someone that age. Girls mature faster and sooner than guys so you are looking for a night of being swept off your feet and romanced by a kid who doesn't even do his own laundry yet!

[AndiieRush]

if you read the whole story you'll get what I mean xD but thanks for your input :3

[Anonymous]

What? Even my just male friend always remember my birthday and give me cards and gifts. I also give him cards and gifts because we care about each other because we are friends. Actually gifts don't matter. Important thing is we remember each others birthday and wrote it on calendar and say happybirthday. He never cares about you.

[AndiieRush]

thats so nice! :3 u have good friends

[cocoaniable]

That really sounds insensitive.. Have you tried talking to him about it? How it makes you feel?

[AndiieRush]

i have but he just evades the subject... im probably being too picky but i just wish he didn't act like that

[Nightshades]

if he treats you on other days you can lose out on one day 😁

[AndiieRush]

i know trust me i do it just kinda hurts he completely ignores that day and doesn't even wanna talk about it. im sorry if i sound self-centered

[Nightshades]

nah don't worry , just leave out his birthday aswell he might not think birthdays are all to important remember he might have been raised without presents growing up

[AndiieRush]

even if i wanted to i couldnt leave out his birthday xD and yea he was raised in a troublesome home so ig that makes sense

[Nightshades]

if it's really a problem you could tell him you want to do something special for both your birthdays

[AndiieRush]

thats not a bad idea actually. ill try it thanks :3

[Nightshades]

🖒🖒🖒🖒

[Lilpotter12]

Do you still with the guy? I Wanted to answer this