I thin you shouldn't stay with him. if he privately dmed his friends saying "shes perfect" then yes it hurts but its not cheating, men are very visual creatures and if they see a woman they like they will stop and stare, no matter how much they love their girlfriend. but the fact that he dmed HER, the girl himself and he FLIRTED, yes that's cheating bc its flirting. he could've just thought to himself "ooh damn happy she's still following me" but he actually reached out to her with the intent of letting her know he's flirting with her, and that wasn't necessary he could've kept those thoughts to himself. I can only imagine this makes your trust issues worse and I'm really sorry about that. i thin you should dump this guy but just know there really are nice guys out there. I have been cheated on too before but now I have a new guy and recently this happened to me with the new guy but it was just that he followed her and it wasn't a big deal but it bothered me and my friend told him without my permission that I was sad and he quickly VOLUNTARILY unfollowed her after finding out it made me unhappy (he never even liked her pics). what I'm saying is that I think u should dump him bc as a girl who aslo has trust issues, there ARE good guys out there (I just gave u an example; I never thought id find someone like that) and you're just wasting your time with this guy, u deserve better. goodluck :)
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Do you trust him? Do you love him? Is he worth all that pain he may cause?( I'm assuming he's the one that cheated on you years ago) You can't love someone and cheat on them, how could you do that to the person you love? I couldn't. I'm sure that your a beautiful smart and kind person that doesn't deserve a man that could do that to you. Fair enough he showed you the texts but love has to have trust. Why would he need to flirt with other women in the first place when he has you? What if it were the other way. I mean if your truly happy together then stay that way but you know what you want in your heart. Years down the line you could meet someone that you love just as much that loves you just as much and he could be different Sometimes we can be blinded by love, and we don't want to accept the truth because it hurts too much. Do what feels best. Whatever you do I hope it all works out in the end.
If he had to go through the trouble of deleting something so you wouldn't see, he knows it was wrong. It wasn't innocent. His behavior right now doesn't qualify as cheating but its sneaky he had to delete something and then lie about it until he found out you already knew. Also I'm confused , you said he DID cheat on you a few years ago, correct?
while his lying to you is definitely a red flag, you are also in the wrong for going through his phone.
if you don't trust him without access to all of his stuff, ditch him and don't even think about dating until you've 1) sorted out your issues and 2) learned healthy boundaries.
Honestly this seems pretty harmless. Commenting on pictures is a FAR CRY away from actual cheating. You need to focus on getting over your trust issues, because if my partner went through my phone like that without telling me, I'd honestly break up with them.
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Im not sure he will trust you so much after this. You looked through his personal stuff without permission. If you dont trust him, he won't trust you either. And if he starts to feel suffocated in the relationship with you because of you nagging at him constantly thats usually what leads to the real cheating. Anyways it does look sketchy with his messages, so if you are having doubts then dump him. It might be better for the both of you
Question. Was the girl a model or someone with high profile? (public figure). Or someone he might know that just has a lot of followers?
And just dump him. I will not be with someone that hides things from me. Just one day, talk to him and leave him.There's something wrong if you're going through his stuff like that and mistrusting him in the first place. I'm not saying it's your fault but something is not right here.
part of a relationship is trust and you don't have it. I'm sure he's hurt by that.
I'm not trying to take his side but I feel like you aren't even giving him a chance to prove himself. those messages aren't ideal and will eat away at your conscious but if you don't give him a chance then it's time to do some self evaluation singleHe didn't do anything... Nothing at all. being encouraging and social is not a crime. Men like to look at pretty girls. "Shocker" if he is arranging meetings and sending dick picks be mad. Until then. Chill.
I see it as a red flag. Personally, I don't think that behavior is appropriate when in a relationship. But only you can decide what the right choice is or whether or not you can continue to trust him.
you know your relationship won't last long if you don't trust him n he doesn't take conscious steps to establish that trust
I would be very concerned as if he knew it was wrong he wouldn't do it...
You're not married so he's not vomited to you and can see other women.
how's middle school?
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