What does it mean when a guy says you are too nice?

[Anonymous]

So I was hanging with my friend Anthony and I was like, "You know, I've never had a bf." And he was like "really?" and I was like "yah, why do you think that is?" And he was like "I don't know, I mean you are pretty and smart. But, you are kind of too nice." I was like "WHAT? TOO NICE? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?" And of course he didn't tell me what THAT means! What does it mean when someone says you are TOO NICE?

[Genesis5]

Many times 'too nice' can mean: I don't have any better answer, and I didn't think you would let me get away with saying I don't know.

If this is a really good friend, it could also mean that you let people take advantage of you or walk all over you.

Are you always doing things for people, even at the expense of your own time and enjoyment? Do people dump things on you, and then go to do what they want to do? It can be hard to tell if you are just being nice, or a pushover.

A good way to tell a difference though is to honestly look at yourself and see when the last time you told someone no. Also, honestly ask yourself if you are comfortable with telling people no.

You friend might just be telling you that you are somewhat of a pushover, or he could just be saying he doesn't know.

Best of luck.

[wolfepak31]

In that context I think he means nice as in polite and reserved not proned to be forward and take the first step which is what some guys like.

[Lady-in-Waiting]

Here's my two-cents, and on good authority:

I was told the same thing when I was your age. A close male friend explained it to me when I asked him about it. He said most guys in college (and high school) are looking for "a good time" and not someone who is a "nice" girl. The "nice" girls are the ones you marry; not the ones you sow your wild oats with.

Being "nice" is a virtue and a huge compliment in "guy language".

[Lady-in-Waiting]

PS: Otherwise, your friend would have defined "Too Nice" for you. He was probably too embarrassed.

[MizzRosa]

That you are too nice. Like you let people do whatever they want. Something like that.

[bgreek1]

I for one would take a nice girl anytime.

[loveAnsweringOldQS]

Many times 'too nice' can mean: I don't have any better answer, and I didn't think you would let me get away with saying I don't know.

If this is a really good friend, it could also mean that you let people take advantage of you or walk all over you.

Are you always doing things for people, even at the expense of your own time and enjoyment? Do people dump things on you, and then go to do what they want to do? It can be hard to tell if you are just being nice, or a pushover.

A good way to tell a difference though is to honestly look at yourself and see when the last time you told someone no. Also, honestly ask yourself if you are comfortable with telling people no.

You friend might just be telling you that you are somewhat of a pushover, or he could just be saying he doesn't know.

Best of luck.