Guys don't flirt with me much?

Question

Guys don't seem to come up to me or flirt with me much. Could it be that I'm too shy? I know that I'm not ugly (not trying to be cocky). I can be kind of quirky, and I'm smart. I'm nice and am a good girl for lack of a better word. I wonder if they think I'm not interested? Any idea?

PHILR · Accepted Answer

THIS COULD DEPEND ON HOW SHY YOU MAY BE. (THIS HOLDS TRUE FOR GUYS AS WELL) I CAN SORT OF SPEAK FROM EXPIERENCE AS A 64 YR.OLD GUY WHO WAS PARANOID SHY TO THE MAX AROUND GIRLS WHEN I WAS IN SCHOOL BACK IN THE 60'S

EVERYONE ONE WANTS TO BE ACCEPTED AND (NEEDED) AND LOVED BY SOMEONE.

YET BECAUSE OF CONDITIONING OF THOUGHT IN SOCIAL STRUCTURING OF SCHOOLS

MOST SHY PEOPLE GENERALLY FEAR ..."REJECTION"... THE MOST. ONE OF THE THINGS THAT MADE THEMSHY IN MANY CASES IS MOST LIKELY A REJECTION IN THE 1ST PLACE THAT WAS EMBARRASSING AND MADE THEM FEEL WORTHLESS. YET BEING SHY CAN COME OFF AS BEING (WITHOUT MEANING TO) BEING CONCEITED OR TOO GOOD ?(HIGH HATTER)SNOBBISH.

AN OLD SAYING GOES "TO HAVE FRIENDS YOU 1ST MUST BE A FRIEND."

THERE ARE SOME VERY PRETTY GIRLS OUT THERE THAT ARE SHY (OR HAVE CONFIDENCE ISSUES) THAT GUYS FIND PUT OFF BY AN AIR OF NOT INTERESTED BECAUSE THE (PERSON BOY/GIRL) DOESN'T RESPOND AS SOMEONE THAT IS MORE OUTGOING MIGHT. SPEAKING AS A GUY SOME FIND BEING A GOOD/NICE PERSON AS BEING ...BORING...(IT SHOULDN'T BUT THATS HOW THE BALL BOUNCES IN TODAYS CULTURE)HOWEVER MANY OF US PUT BLINDERS ON.WE DON'T SEE IT BECAUSE WE MAY BE UNAWARE OF IT AT THE TIME THAT WE COULD BE BEING FLIRTED WITH AND NOT KNOW IT. DO A GOOGLE ON SHY GUYS BODY LANGUAGE. READ AT LEAST 8 DIFFERENT ARTILCLE ON THE SUBJECT . YOU MAY BE SURPRISED AT WHAT YOU FIND OUT AND HOW MANY GUYS ARE IN FACT FLIRTING WITH YOU AND YOU NOT KNOW IT.

I HOPE SOME OF THIS HELPS BUT WOULDN'T IT BE GOOD TO KNOW FOR SURE WHAT GUYS ARE ACTUALLY INTERESTED IN YOU AND PUT YOUR BEST FOOT FORWARD IN THE GETTING ACQUIANTED PROCESS BY FOCUSSING ON THOSE GUYS THAT ARE REALLY INTERESTED IN YOU.

nate18 · Accepted Answer

they may be intimidated. this is what would work to get me more comfortable to approach a girl. smile lots, did you know that it takes only 17 muscles to smile. a nice smile can go a very very long ways in making a guy comfortable enough to talk to you. now, the most important part...smile at him. if a girl is smiling, its a good sign, if the girl is smiling at me, its a great sign. even if your shy let the guy see that your smiling at him. even if for just a second. after that first time I spot her smiling at me I continue to look over to see if she's looking again. if it happens 3 or 4 times, its pretty obvious she's into me. I have nothing to lose to go and talk to her because I know that she already let me see her looking at me several times so she must like something about me. either she finds me attractive or she's looking at me because she finds something funny about me. maybe I'm acting like a fool and she thinks its funny.

so to sum it up smile a lot. wen you see a guy you like SMILE AT HIM EVEN MORE and make sure he sees you. but don't stare, that just gets awkward

BreeSummers81 · Accepted Answer

From women to women you're not an ugly girl. You are an attractive girl. As many men have said, maybe you're not approachable. Maybe you're intimidating. It also depends on what a guy is looking for as well. If you don't seem like the type they are going for at the time, they are less likely to approach you. Besides, not all guys have good intentions and maybe it's a great thing that you are not approachable to ALL types of guys. And maybe shier guys don't think they'll be your type.

bananagirl · Accepted Answer

you might not be ugly,

but if you're extremely shy and don't put yourself out there to have a guy flirt with you, then you're still not going to get a guy flirting with you,

you see what I mean ?

what you put into the conversation is what you will get out of it as well.

TheCheshireCat · Accepted Answer

It's probably because you are shy.  I don't have any lucky with men either, but that is my own fault.  I never make an effort to talk to guys, and I get very anxious when I attempt to ask a guy out.

GuyAdviceFromGuy · Answer

Depends on the setting, even if you are hot, most guys won't approach you at the following places

-Book stores

-The mall

-Bus stop

-Grocery aisle

-Restaurant

-Library

-In traffic court

-etc etc

Usually it's because they don't know you, don't know what you will think, or are just plain nervous, because most likely other people are around and they can hear everything if say he asks for your number. What you need to do is go to places that guys will go up to you

-Nightclubs

-Bars

-A class

-An community organization

-A book club

Basically you have to be in some sort of social setting where talking with people you don't know is common. Heck, the places most guys won't approach you sometimes they do, and if they do do not confuse them with just being nice. If you find yourself at a bus stop and a guy starts talking about the weather with you he is probably interested. But yea, try going to a social setting and make good eye contact and smile a lot and you should be fine!

YouKnowThatGuy · Answer

Well, most guys are going to look for signs that you will be receptive to them approaching you. If you send out none of those signals, most won't risk it. Who wants to be rejected? Nobody, that's who. If you aren't making eye contact, not smiling, no sending those signals, not only will he think you probably aren't interested, you might also be sending signals that he's making you uncomfortable just by him looking at you.

Make eye contact, smile. Even if you can't do it for very long before you revert back to shyness, try. The more you send the signals that you are okay with him approaching you, the more likely guys are to approach you.

You don't have to be the most confident girl in the room, chatting up everyone, but if you catch eye contact with a guy you want to talk to, SMILE AT HIM. Do not look angry or displeased, look happy to be there. People aren't going to want to talk to the person who looks like somebody just broke bad news to them.

Jesse313313 · Answer

Guys don't approach you because you don't have anything they want. Most guys want hot chicks at a young age. With maturity there standards decrease  because they realize that there's not enough hot women to male ratio. You will get approached. Don't get down on yourself, just think positive act positive, and appear approachable and personable, it will happen some day. Also have good hygiene and dress nicely

Nneuromancer · Answer

Here is the game. You smile (that says hey you, there is something about you that I like).  Guy smiles back then goes about what he was doing (hey your hot but I’m taken). Guy smiles then back to what he is doing but keeps looking back (I’m shy I like you but does that really mean you like me, or you just being nice?) Guys smiles walks over and flirts (Well you know the rest at this point)

solstice06 · Answer

How do you show interest? If it's of a subtle nature, guys are usually oblivious. Take a risk and be a little more outgoing, flirt with a guy and watch what happens. Whether you are quirky or not, if you own your quirkiness and stay confident no matter how quirky, it's attractive because it shows that you're OK with being yourself. It's cute.

awaken03 · Answer

Some guys only go first for the looks then the personality..But you don't have to be somebody your not just to catch guys attention. Being too shy or quiet can also be a factor..If there is a certain guy out there you seem to have your liking, you should smile and say hi every time you get a chance you meet. If you can look him straight in the eye glance at him and get on your way..from there a guy would get a hint that you like him..

Drake742 · Answer

Maybe that's what it is, they don't think you're interested in them. Quirky is so cool, my last girlfriend was quirky; so am I, and we got along so well. DOn't try to hide or change that about yourself.

Track4roy · Answer

work on your swagger, use inner affirmation of an alpha female look it up on the world wide web. your on your innner not outer. main interest that strike an alpha male: confidence, good posture, the walk, and the loyality.

Anonymous · Answer

You probably just look unapproachable or stuck up. Guys don't like going up to chicks that will blow them off like there's no tomorrow. They would rather spend their time going to chicks that will be receptive to their efforts.

funkadelic5 · Answer

Girls don't seem to come up to me or flirt with me much. Or ever. I always have to do everything, lol.

mhairixo · Answer

Guys are drawn to confidence, so be abit more self-confident. Don't confuse this with arrogance.

Ezmotts · Answer

They might be intimidated by your physical appearance and thus think it'd be a waste of time to approach you.

Anonymous · Answer

i don't know, I'm the same. I'm shy and stuff, oh well I guess. My time will come haha

tommiefromva · Answer

Maybe you should try flirting with them

TRUEMicah · Answer

Being too friendly can also be a factor.

Tphilly187 · Answer

cause your from texas lol

Guys don't flirt with me much?

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