Are guys really THAT SIMPLE like y'all say you are?

Question

Before you jump to answer, hear me out. I'm not saying men are better/worse- just curious how simple y'all are. I think men are complex. So many guys say that they want a straight-forward girl. But what I've discovered is men actually like a chase- as long as you aren't playing games, men like some mystery. Don't dish out all you fell about em too soon. They don't want to be PURPOSELY ignored but they tend to put in less effort if they know they caught you and then have you do all the planning/initiating instead of taking turns. And some men go so far extreme to like "hard to get"- I have exes and friends who say they want a girl who plays those games cuz they admit they lose interest if she stops playing too early. This is not all guys, but even guys who say they want a direct girl really don't cuz then she's "too much" or "boring" or both. I once asked a guy out 5 hrs after a first date- apparently that was a turn off... Anyways I thought y'all wanted us to make a move more...

To be CLEAR: not a discussion of men being worse/better or more complex then females. I will block you if you clearly didn't read. I also am not saying women aren't difficult. We are :)

watrewks · Accepted Answer

Lol I love you admitting that at the end 😂😂😂

I agree with you. I never thought about the complexity that guys do have. Yes we love mystery that’s why lingerie, leggings, short skirts, tank tops are so arousing 😍😍

When guys do say that we’re simple I feel like it’s usually in response to women trying to figure out what a guy wants or them trying to figure out his experience. Guys just don’t process emotions like women do and not everything is related to everything lol. Guys like direct information and that’s usually what he means when he says he likes direct girls.

Men and women experience life differently and if a girl gets mad at me because she thinks I’m completely dismissing how something is affecting her and I’m insensitive for not considering her feelings when the reality is that I just wasn’t aware of what she was going through, I’m not going to feel shame and guilt over something I’m not doing. If you want to talk, then talk, but keep in mind I’m not going to understand you like your girlfriends so the direct communication really does help.

While typing this I thought about girls and deciding on what to eat. I’ve always been told the girl just wants a guy to lead and pick the place. For any guy reading this a good trick is to pay attention to what types of food she talked about earlier in the day, or maybe even the week. If she hasn’t talked about food, go with her favorite food. If you don’t know her favorite food then Italian and Mexican are usually good choices. Sushi is a risk but she’ll tell you if she doesn’t like it lol.

AllThatSweetJazz · Accepted Answer

Sort of. It's not that they're complicated, it's more a problem about relative complexity. That is to say, they may not be that complex, but the issue is that women don't understand them that well.

For example, you sort of got part of it but then say "but they tend to put in less effort if they know they caught you and then have you do all the planning/initiating". The issue there is that you think that's a problem. Guys don't consider that a problem. That a *girl* problem being projected onto guys' normal reaction.

Let's explore the thinking: I'm trying to get the girl and it's a fucking chore and I hate it, but I do it because it's demanded of me. Hopefully, I can put up with it long enough to win a girl over and jump through all their dumb hoops. Now, at that point I would like to stop jumping through so many hoops and just enjoy the relationship.

So when it comes to initiating/planning, well that doesn't happen because they don't care about that.

*You do*.

They don't plan or initiate too hard because they're not interested in making plans or doing anything (in the way women want).

So *you* interpreted it as a result of "enjoying the chase", but from my perspective it's that I enjoy *not* chasing anymore and want to chill in this happy relationship I've finally arrived at.

See? It's not so much about complexity, but more that you're wired to get it wrong.

Xoxocutekitty · Accepted Answer

I think how some women have 'princess' syndrome, you know, grow up expecting a man to be her knight and 'save her' from bills and strife, some men have 'knight' syndrome.

They want to go around saving a 'high value' woman, or well a princess. Modern women who don't want to be saved come across as forward, headstrong, and there's little chase or 'kerchief dropping.'

Ladies, you do know what I mean, casually suggesting dates, so he can invite you on them later. 😉

I think desire for open, clear, and constructive criticism come with maturity. Most mature men have other things in life that they value over games. I do think though, that regardless of gender, you want to put a little 'work' or skin into the game, for you to value it.

Coulis · Accepted Answer

I'm not a man but I think that every person is different. Some people are more complex than others and some men are more complex than their male counterparts.

I think it's more so a matter of women and men having more particular expectations in different areas.

For example, men and women have different complexity levels when it comes to bathroom cleanliness.

Most women are happy their car runs while a man may freak out if there is some minite aound that he hears while his wife is like yeah I don't hear it.

These are of course very archetypal but you get my drift.

Account · Answer

I dont know one single person who is simple. No matter the gender.

VanillaSalt · Answer

Your first mistake are “guys”. Guys are as simple and as compiled as girls. It depends on what and who you’re dealing with.

Let’s mindscape. Do you think a man who’s always getting dates and who’s successful and confident will appreciate women being direct like a man who’s shy and less confident or less successful with women?

Here’s a big lesson to learn. Women want that tall, dark, and handsome rich guy who will give them everything... all women want him. Do you think he appreciates you if he’s got 8 more of you waiting if you don’t please him? The more high quality a guy is the more women you have to out due to land him. And he’ll always be tempted by other younger women then you.

Ide share my mindset with you but I’m getting bored and you just need to learn is not important what other people want. Your not going to approach someone pretending to be funny if you’re not funny just because they like funny... you’re going to show off your other traits. You approach and either they say yes or they say no. I wish it was so easy for men as it is for women. Ide be married with kids right now.

Pogi-Paddy-2 · Answer

I do not completely agree with your question here because I have experienced in my life that most women try to lump guys into a box. If you are using your preferences of what you think guys are about, you are selling yourself short because there are several billion men on this planet and no two men are the same, or think the same.

As an example you stated that men like to chase women as long as they don't play games. I disagree with this in its entirety because personally I am not going to chase or change anything or anyone. And I also believe that when I am trying to meet someone who has set standards and no flexibility within these standards this person has a very limited pool of potential mates to choose from.

Therefore by also saying that you will block someone who doesn't follow your directions within your question, you are shutting yourself off from a lot of people too. Just remember that there are many people whom may have some good feedback that you are steering them away.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

This is some confused ass shit. Wtf. We dont want you to play hard to get. We want you to be hard to get. Meaning keep your legs closed to shitty dudes. Stop being a ho.

Secondly why are you asking men on dates? Thats fucked up. No wonder you're having problems. No men dont want you to make the moves. Thats for us to do.

Your problem is there is two kinds of men, passive men and active men, beta men alpha men, whatever you want to call them... passive men are very shy and ofc are going to give you advice like ask them out, but most women do not prefer these men, they mostly sit home alone and play video games or are guys you friendzone. The men women usually like are more active or alpha and so if you ask one of these men out they will consider it a red flag. Women who are too aggressive with asking a man out are generally low quality women. So yeah thats going to turn us off.

Essentially in stereotype terms think of it like this: your asking the no friends video game nerd how to land a date with the popular football qb. Its not going to work.

Anonymous · Answer

First of all, it's true there are a handful of guys who like the chase, but the vast majority of us do not. Don't make the mistake of seeing one guy who does and then assuming the rest of us do, too. We don't. If you make a guy chase you, you are playing games. Period. And we are likely to interpret your behavior as disinterest and just move on. Why? Because in our minds a woman who shows no interest seems obviously disinterested, because logic.

Now, to your question about whether guys are "simple". No, we are not. Each of us is different and unique and we are not robots. We have personalities with different wants, likes and needs. But having said that, we are not difficult to figure out and we are not unpredictable because we behave and make decisions based on logic, whereas women tend to be more emotionally driven and their motives are much less understandable or predictable as a result. That's the difference. Don't confuse being logical with being simple.

Take sexuality as an example. It's not hard to understand what men want and why, and we are very easy to turn on. Women's sexuality, on the other hand, will always remain a mystery to us guys. Here's a quote from a WebMD article that says it well.

"Study after study shows that men's sex drives are not only stronger than women's, but much more straightforward. The sources of women's libidos, by contrast, are much harder to pin down."

https://www.webmd.com/sex/features/sex-drive-how-do-men-women-compare

Qdbrown · Answer

Don't think many guys unstand your question. They don't want an easy girl, and they want a girl who is in their league or better. He wants to feel like she is not been around nor easy to get.

Many women would see that as the chase, but he is just figuring out if you're just a quick lay, or a woman of value? That's why I wouldn't recommend sleeping with guys on the first few dates. Especially the first, because although exceptions, most guys like naughty girls, but not naughty girlfriends, less it's that time to be crazy, at that moment. Nothing given has any value.

Once you get around that, most guys are simple. Say what you want, and don't chit test too much.

JBlade · Answer

I get where you are coming from but realistically that's a smaller portion of men. Guys who are immature and younger may like the chase but most live their livelihoods in the background of society so they have stuff going on in life. Most guys, who are worth a damn, don't want to or won't play games (the chase is still a game), they don't have the time, patience, and they don't want the stress. Guys who are seeking a worthwhile relationship, in terms of a long-term partner, want cooperation from a women. So being hard to deal with or extra when courting will make the decision to opt out easier.

JackSmy · Answer

I'm not one of the Majority, on this, but to me, and what many of my guy friends say, most guys just want a Girlfriend/Lover/Wife to just think they are the best of EVERYTHING, and treat him like he is special, and amazing, and never look at other guys, or say anything negative about him, as he seems to think he needs to be adored, revered, maybe.
I think a lot of guys would agree with Chris Rock, in one of his Stand-ups, when he said what men want: "Feed me, Fuck me, Shut the Fuck up!"
I find it offensive, even in that "joke" as it perpetuates the sexism, the past.
I think a lot of guys ARE THAT SIMPLE, and they honestly want that.
Sorry, don't kill the messenger, OK?

HawkPerception · Answer

I'm gonna be a little arrogant and say it... I'm a lot more honest than the average person. I always told my ex where I was at all times as soon as I changed locations. I let them know who I was with. I told them what I was doing. I always speak my mind whether it's negative or positive. I keep things real and I appreciate people that are just as honest with me. I hate all the fakeness and cloak and dagger out there nowadays. If something's on your mind, say it. If you're interested, show it or I'm out. I'm not gonna give attention to someone that clearly isn't into me. On to better things. Maybe some guys are into that, but I'd say they're lower IQ and just chasing for the P.

Leavesbound · Answer

It is not that we are not complex. It is that we do not usually communicate in a complex manner with lots of things between the lines and lots of hidden meanings. One of the most frustrating things for a man is hearing a woman ask "Yes but what do you really mean?" If I say "red" I mean red not "green."

SomeGuyCalledTom · Answer

If the chemistry is there from the beginning, then it doesn't make much difference whether the girl is direct right away, or whether she plays games and plays hard to get. There's probably something to be said for reserving a little bit of mystery, to increase the sexual tension and make for a more exciting "release". But pretending to be flat out uninterested just kills any chemistry that was there, and only weak-minded men will stick around for a woman who actively kills off chemistry. Flirtation and chemistry and connection should be reciprocal, otherwise what's the point?

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

I don't want to chase, if I have to persue I give up, I like when she chases me instead though.

I hate mystery in relationships/dating. I want to know every last minute detail about a person to know if I should be their SO or not, and I want the info as quickly as possible.

I wan't to know how she feels about me as quickly as possible as well.

If I know I "caught" a girl as my girlfriend, I put in a lot more effort, not less.

Girls who play hard to get I lose interest in and ignore, I take it as her not being interested in me and move on.

I want a very direct girl, to the point of being adorably blunt.

The only thing I tend to drag out is proving she is the type she says she is, because it seems impossible to do in a short period of time.

Anonymous · Answer

Men are simpler than most women can believe.

On the very very rare occasion when a girl actually listens to the advice of men and starts downgrading her idea of how complex men are... she finds that they are absurdly simple and her relationships with all the men in her life improve. I've seen it before. Doubtless I will again.

There will always be those girls who hear this and go "Can't possibly be true". They will continue to get annoyed and frustrated and wonder why men make no sense to them.

The few rare girls who get it.. they know. We are simpler than you are prepared to believe.

RingOfFire · Answer

I liked and agreed with everything up until you said you would block people who didn't stick to the topic. It's better to let people speak.

I think everything you said is right. Men are natural hunters. They like the hunt, and the competitive game.

Usually, it's a kind of a turnoff if the girl approaches me. Makes me feel (subconsciously) that maybe she isn't worth the hunt. It's best when you are at least a little (but not too) hard to get. A challenge, but not downright impossible. You have to at least give clues you are interested otherwise the hunter gives up the hunt. Have to strike that balance.

Yes, men are every bit as complicated as women, but in different ways.

rievious · Answer

You sound very intelligent. Not with you're words but with your observation.

Yes as a guy I like both. Somedays are better than others and I mean on days when I come home and am tired I don't want a girlfriend who is playing hard to get (ignore the implied gender sterotype). I like a balance between the personalities. Reminds me why I wanted us to become a couple in the first place. She would be so clever to know when that attitude would be best. It would make me so happy... so yes we are that simple... unless your point is to be that girl is hard to reach making it an unrealistic goal a woman needs to meet, then no I guess our expectations are too high and we should lower the bar.

Anonymous · Answer

Everyone has their own pattern, men tend to follow a basic pattern that other men get and is simple. Women follow their own pattern, compared to men by men it seems complex, but to women simple and women understand each other better. To woman who don't understand man's basic pattern it is complex, but for the few men with their own pattern it can be even more challenging. Women who are more acquainted with the basic pattern aren't prepared for mine. Some women do things expected it to work, but not because I have my own pattern. A woman I am getting to know seems to understand, but most don't. I follow the bro code for some things, but ultimately my guidance is from the Bible.

Nikola321 · Answer

Well yeah it's true, guys (not all ofc) do think that it's a man's job to approach first and try hard to get the girl and all that, but there's def a solid amount that wants a girl to make some moves too :D
Personally, I would like a girl that puts as much effort as I do, but that's cuz I'm shy and ngl, a little clumsy and insecure about that stuff :D

sensible27 · Answer

People who really see that "thing" in you, will like you and maybe want to be around you even if you don't "make them" chase you. Someone who values their time (andmaybeyourstoo?) wouldn't really want to play a "game" and it could be a turn off. You have to maybe find that someone who really understands you, "if you've to play the game you've already lost"

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Men are really simple…. Let me put it to you like this; I have never met a single guy in my entire life that wants to play the games you are talking about with girls. Every single one hates that shit with a passion. Guys play those games because being straight up with women doesn’t work.

Twalli · Answer

I DON'T chase. You want to run, I won't follow. Tell me exactly what you mean or want. If you want to be mysterious, it will be a mystery. You can play games, I can lose interest. If I want to be with you I will do it. If you pretend indifference, then I will go after someone who doesn't. I would prefer a girl asks me to be her boyfriend first, I don't have to guess anymore.

user4477388 · Answer

Yes we are simple most of us men don't have 6 , 10 or 20 pairs of shoes like many women do we generally have 3 pairs a pair of work shoes or boots , casual pair and a dress pair. We like simple because it's the easiest as we can focus on things we like rather than things we have to do so the simpler the better

007kingifrit · Answer

a wise man was once asked "why do you not come to see me more often" he responded "because that question is nicer to hear than "why have you come to see me again""

everyone loses interest if you talk to them too often but that's a human thing not a man thing

Havill4nd · Answer

I wouldn't say I'm simple, I come with a lot of baggage. But most guys I know seem simpler than me, and they all have partners.

I think I'd prefer a more straightforward girl. I dont pick up signal very well. If you'd have asked me out 5 hour after the first date it would have turned me off.

MCheetah · Answer

Literally everything about this post is wrong. I don't even know where to begin. 100% of it is incorrect.

Anonymous · Answer

Those "men" are weird. In fact If I were you I would question whether those "men" would be long term boyfriend material if they say one thing but do the other. You wouldn't miss out on an immature boy.
Simply put - I say what I mean. Such silly games belong in kindergarten and not in the adulthood. I rather actually chase a higher salary than playing chasing skirts.

iseekpinetrees · Answer

Most guys are simple feedm fuck m and run ur fingers through their hair when u hold them and most would be pretty happy people. But those that play games usually act like girls.

TheFlak38 · Answer

Everything you say is false about men and true for women. No reasonable man who respects himself "enjoys the chase". Chasing is feminine behaviour. It turns the vagina into the Sahara desert.

deeks1121 · Answer

Me personally? I'm pretty simple. I tell you how it is and how I feel, so what you see is what you get. Sometimes it's a bad thing but other times it's a good trait

es20490446e · Answer

Both men and women are simple. It's just guys are straightforward about it, where women tend to hide it somehow.

lucas262 · Answer

Men think in straight lines. Women think in mazes. Men are direct women indirect

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

No. Most people claim this and that but in reality most people are a pain to deal with. Watch your local news and just pay attention around the world around you.

People are always moaning and complaining about something from Trump, Biden etc.

Luvme66 · Answer

Pretty much.

EssenceOfLight · Answer

"hard to get" turns often in arrogant and entitled. If a guy starts to feel contempt for a girl there is no way it turns in attraction again.

innerman · Answer

HOW OLD ARE THE PEOPLE YOUR DATING?  at a certain age” both genders are tired of games. and one tells you that’s a spade, they really mean it’s a spade not a big spoon

Jamie05rhs · Answer

I would never respond negatively to a girl being direct with me. Directness is always welcome!

Omar5881 · Answer

As long as you’re generalizing you won't ever know what “ men want “ every persona to their own

Ryfyle · Answer

Simple where it counts. Guys who like bullshit mind games are fucked up somewhere deep. I don't care for the chase, I got better shit to do.

noob__master · Answer

Yes we are. All we want is. 1) a family 2) a wife who loves us

fred_durst · Answer

of course no , we have over 3 billion men in this planet , there is no way every single of them are same

Guanfei · Answer

Nope, we're actually simpler than we say we are. What we say is what we mean.

Anonymous · Answer

you know how this post can be written by a guy about girls? yeah guys and girls are pretty much the same the difference is just in the details

Anonymous · Answer

depends on the guy  BUT YES MEN ARE MORE SIMPLE THAN WOMEN

JamieLoves · Answer

Pretty much... Just don’t start thinking we’ll take your shit

DeltaCharlieEcho · Answer

Yup. Estrogen just makes women literally crazy by comparison.

anylolone · Answer

Nope. The simplicity there is only managed through effort.

Anonymous · Answer

Really hilarious that you think you actually know anything about men.

Marhaban-1 · Answer

Men are more straightforward than girls

Dontaaa · Answer

I'd say that it all varies from guy to guy.

jamesgoldman · Answer

Me yeah  Most guys no

_no_one_ · Answer

Emotionally maybe not

Anonymous · Answer

It all depends on the guy, same with women.

blondfrog · Answer

No that's just in general.

Anonymous · Answer

No, men are humans like women.

narc-survivor · Answer

It’s not the gender its the person

alcelg2020 · Answer

I completely agree with you 100%

Anonymous · Answer

People in general are complicated beings

Anonymous · Answer

Im more complex than you, for sure

Anonymous · Answer

boobs, butt and blowjobs keep us happy

WowwGirl · Answer

They are simple

princeofromance · Answer

Yes!

Are guys really THAT SIMPLE like y'all say you are?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Are guys really THAT SIMPLE like y'all say you are?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.