Asker. That is a question I can answer because I never dated, I never done anything what you guys did, I'm a virgin, I believe in Godly values, and I believed in affected friendships and relationships with people. You however have no excuse. You have no right to ask that question. And I will tell you why. Reread everything you wrote. Reread it more than 5 times if you have to. And see if you get where I'm coming from. You say so much that your adults, and I'll be honest with you. No you are not. Neither you nor him is an adult. You're both still mentally children. You demand a relationship now, you demanding that he be with you now, you the man he gets things done now, and you do not seem to listen to the fact that he is struggling, he already told you what he felt, he was more than enough honest about how he felt, but there's one thing he can't tell you because you're pushy, no offense, you're pushy as hell, is that he is not ready for a serious relationship. But you know what makes it worse and hypocrite on your part, you choose to have premarital sex with this guy. And now because you had premarital sex with him now you're pushing him even further because you're scared you made a mistake having sex with him. I'm sorry that's your mistake. That's your responsibility. You need to be an accountable as an adult do not open up your leg to a person who isn't your husband. And that's exactly what you did. He's not going to see any form of taking any accountability to it because neither is you. How can he respect you if you don't respect yourself? Men will not respect you like that. They don't seem to understand it because everybody and their mama had sex before marriage. If you wanted something serious, then you should have wait for marriage to have sex, and if you're not a virgin like me, you should have saved your virginity. These all got consequences intend to follow you throughout your life and you pretty much proving it.
If he was honest with you you still would have left him because you have no time to get yourself involved with a person who isn't going to give you what you want. That's your attitude. It's best you be honest with yourself, and be honest how you treat him, and how you treat people, before you want to start talkin about how others treat you. Because you're just as guilty as this man that you involved with. Be honest with yourself? Are you willing to wait for this person no matter how long it takes for a relationship? Because if you cannot, it is you who is best to move on and stop wasting each other's time. But don't blame him for something you equally chose to do. That is simply my advice.
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You've got two options, you either believe him when he's saying he's going through something & be patient: or you move on.
If he's going through something stressful, of course he won't lay that on you. You barely know each other and are still building trust. Makes sense that he would withdraw because men tend to bottle emotions anyway.
Invite him out to do something fun/goofy - you plan and offer it. He might need to also see more effort on your part with meeting up - not many girls actually plan dates. Plus, this could be a nice break from whatever he's dealing with.
Hey I think I understand what you mean. I think I´m a bit similar to him so I wanna try that to help you understand. Some guys like me (and probably) like him we´re not got at talking about our feelings because we´re not used it. Maybe different than women or other men we can´t talk about because we simply can´t say how we specifically feel. It´s hard for us to describe how we feel because we´re not doing it on a regular basis. Of all the people I spend time with in month are approximately 40-45% are female though I only talk about my feelings with 5 of them, because my feelings are the most inner me. There´s nothing in my life that needs more trust I needd to have in companion to talk about with than my emotions and feelings.
I have 5 women I know so well that I know they can keep those secret for sure.
Now to you´re guy. The question if he´s into you or not is possibly answered by his behavior before that problem accured. He said that appreciated your offer. That´s something he probably wouldn´t have said if there were no feelings towards you at all. The answer why he´s not talking with you about is probably because you´ve never had any "exclusive" chat. Because you´ve never spent time alone with him but probably always with other people he´s not sure if he could trust you. Don´t get me wrong and don´t take as an offense, I know it´s hard. But because you´ve never been close friends he´s not ready to come to you with his problem. Be patient with him and keep things going on a casual level first. If you wanna enhance things a bit and have feelings for him you could start by telling him smaller secrets of yours and by showing him that you trust him. That way you can open a room of deep talk in your friendship which would make it easier for him to talk about his feelings later on. The reason he distanced himself could be that he occured a big problem in his life he needs to solve. Because he doesn´t classify you as "trustable" yet he´s not talking with you about it.
But I can also understand you´re concerning because you´re solving problem differently. While he might be a guy like me, we´re feelings might be combined with a certain problem. While you and others are easy to talk about you´re feelings we´re not. Give him time and show that you´re generally interested in him and that you there for him but don´t make him rush things more than he´s up to.
To sum it up I think he likes you and is attracted to you at some point but he´s distracted by something else you can´t make him say because if you do, he´ll never trust you.
-----------He's not interested but loves the validation.
Sometimes a guys ego can get ahead of itself way too early trying to impress someone that they really don't even know if they like or not. He also might enjoy the validation of you liking him and doesn't want that to go away even though he's not interested.
My advice is leave him be and watch out for validation come backs. If he comes back wishy washy like before then he just wants more validation from you to make himself feel good. This happens with men and women by the way not just men. Stop giving him energy you are not receiving. If a guy likes you you will know it. Excuses like those he gave are typical for a guy who doesn't have the balls to tell you how he really feels. Move on.
"It's not an ending. It's just the point in the story where you turn the page."
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Sorry that happened to you.
You weren't a couple so I don't see that you have the right to be that upset with him. It was your choice to invest a lot of time in a guy who didn't ask for more than friends/talking. Next time don't take a person seriously if they haven't done any actions to show that they're being serious.
How he's acting could mean that you did something to lower his enthusiasm or that something happened in his life to do that. Could go either way. Not saying you need to fix anything. You're just not a good match.
If you were a couple and this happened I'd say he is debating whether to dump you or not and hasn't made up his mind yet.He's really messing around, it's not entirely your fault because the part where you said that you called him out, I'm assuming that you were honest about your intentions and were about to cut the contact. So he definitely knows you want a relationship but IS STILL NOT LETTING YOU GO. You know what, just screw him and block his ass for good. He is USING you as a validation robot and will soon use you as a sex toy in the future. That's why he's not letting you go but at the same time not changing his asshole attitude.
Why don’t you just focus on building attraction. Guys usually pull away due to fear of intimacy and commitment. You don’t need to be rude with him neither act uninterested. Just give him some time. It’s a dating game you need to play until you meet someone whose attracted and committed to you.
That’s why please don’t just focus on ONE guy. Keep dating other men it’s that simple.
it’s not that he isn’t interested in you. Men tend to pull away you’ll just need to know how to handle such situations. plus points for not having sex with him. Just keep meeting and building attraction with other men too. You’ll be fine.
among all men who gave you advice on here krakenattackin said it the best in one line.funny i seem to have gone threw this myself last year a met a man i was so confused he acted like he liked me a couple of months later i asked him if he would ever be interested in me he said no im not his type and he wasn't interested but stared at me for 7 months after that and we werent even talking at all men play games not all but some will even though he told me how he felt the fact he kept looking at me gave me hope when there wasn't any he's 67 im 55 how sad is that he was the first man i was ever attracted to and honestly the first man that ever played this game with me and by the way in December he asked a girl out right in front of me after that my heart was broken find someone that will talk to you if you meet another man like him walk away and say NEXT YOU DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER
Listen As an guy i wil tell you one thing... I like a girl... she lives in mine apartment , she is younger than me... I have been shifted to this apartment almost now 2 years... Since we have saw each other... we kinda devloped feelings for each other... Earlier i thaught that i must be thinking much why the hell she will like me?
I have seen her staring at me 2-3 times when i am not looking at her.. but when i looked back her she in miniseconds tooked her eyes off.
And after that whenever we accidentally met with each other... we never had a guts to look in each others eyes...
When we met accidentally sometimes we both behave awkward... i can notice that in her and in mine too..
So what should i do tell me? She is not even giving me a pure sign is she interested in me or she is but coz of society pressure she is hiding that or is she waiting for me for the first move?
Help me out... somebody...For me personally, I often end up leading women on. Because I am horny, so I hit on some women online, we start talking, and they usually seem to be looking for something else.
I know people say you should just be honest with what you're looking for, but the few times I have tried that, it has blown up in my face. My impression is that it is only very attractive/desirable guys who can get away with saying they're just looking for something casual. When you're not that desirable (like me), the only women who seem to be into you are those looking for some commitment.
Since women are more in demand than the average guy, dating ultimately happens on your terms. We hit on you, we try to woo you, impress you, get a response, even. You then give us a thumbs up or a thumbs down.
I don't think it's exactly a mystery that it is easier for the buyer (women) to be honest about what they want, than for the seller (men).Girl that is my story you just told. I have a guy friend that fed me so much false promises. He made it seem like he was into me. But he comes and goes in my life and he has hurt me by leaving me for months. Until he is ready to come back in my life again. He has done this twice already and I had enough. That I confronted him about it
It's difficult to express your feelings when you can't even look at your crush in the eyes
https://tse1.mm.bing.net/th?id=OGC.90addc2ddf47cadcd34dbbb668923a5c&pid=Api&rurl=https%3a%2f%2fmedia.giphy.com%2fmedia%2f3o6MbkPYITG5sOJXDG%2fgiphy.gif&ehk=Acwdz9GrMCb%2fWL3W5SPjSH%2f9mu53ttfrxHsMizZC7wM%3dThe guy who don't play games approach you and say!..
"wanna bang" or they come rub your ass.. Or squeeze it..
And you are like! "disgusting creepy!" or you slap them..
You aren't happy with honest guys either...
So guys start playing games.. You force us to play games... And then this type of question come on Gag!..You two have yet to actually meet? …and this long drug out getting passed the first meet thing is a huge reason why meeting online sucks out loud. Then of course finally meeting them often leaves you wondering how the hell you ever built them up in your head.
We've all tried to be honest with women at least once, usually several times. We don't keep doing it because it doesn't work. If you try to be honest with a woman, she usually thinks you're lying and everything blows up anyway. Y'all seem to prefer lack of clarity and playing games; that's the only way guys can successfully date so many of you.
Because it's not in his best interest to do so. He might not trust how you'd handle his honesty, he might view it as not worth his time, or might just want to string you along. Either way, it doesn't benefit him to be honest. This is pretty much what women do to men: string them along while avoiding being honest so that they can keep those men as options and get attention or validation from them.
This sounds like a problem of your own making and you are blaming him for what is entirely down to you.
He didn't make you think anything - you just assumed a lot about what he felt. You assume he knows things because you drop hints.
You clearly have no interest in learning what's going on from a mans point of view. You just want to blame him and have those emotions validatedI have a burning question that I have to ask. Why are you putting this all on him? If you want to end things with him, do so, then his feelings on the matter become redundant.
I used to be afraid. I didn't want to be embarrassed by the inevitable rejection. I don't know if that's what going on in this case. He might be confused and unsure he wants the responsibility to commit with you.
The guy you chose eventually didn't want you like he thought. Then again you've been talking to him and he is not your boyfriend, so why you having these kind of problems with the man that has no commitment to you?
Because so many women use displays of vulnerability as a weapon or a reason for contempt.
If people showed more respect for others, people would be more willing to risk being vulnerable.Fear of rejection. And most of the time it's not even that. I personally think she wouldn't accept that I don't even fear it anymore, I know it.
Because most of the time when we are, the response we get is "ewww no". Or the woman decides to just humiliate us in front of her friends.
Fuck that. We ain't putting up with that no more.He may be a Narc, this kind of behavior is how they start to get you hooked
he doesn't sound interested and doesn't want to lose you, i'd move on
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