My ex wanted to be friends, now he doesn’t speak to me, why?

[Anonymous]

My ex and I dated for almost 4 years. We were very much in love. I was 17-21 and he was 20-24. I’m sure we both had our complaints about the relationship just as much as the positive, as we were both very young. I always believed we would just grow together. He was my first boyfriend. Instead of our relationship growing, as I was patiently waiting for, after a few years he told me he wanted a break for the whole summer instead. he completely ignored me. I was devastated. I’m leaving out a lot of the story. When we got back together I felt differently towards him for that. Few months passed and I told him I wanted a break. I started dating someone else without him knowing. They later found out and I chose the new man. I still am sorry for how it all went about, I just wanted to feel happy in a relationship. I stayed with the new guy for 3 years, and he was awful to me. My ex reached out to me once during that time but I didn’t respond. After 3 years, I reached out to my ex to apologize, again. I always felt so bad. He told me he wanted to be friends, and he was sorry too. He and I exchanged numbers again and he would message me. I was so happy as I don’t have any friends, I struggle with making friends. He invited me over rather quickly and we had a great conversation. I told him that I’m happy we can be friends. I felt after that day he kind of became distant from me which hurt. He told me I’m always welcome to come over though. I would always reach out and ask if he would like to do things with me but he never really seem interested. When he was first speaking to me, he seemed like he was very ready to be friends, now he doesn’t talk to me at all. Why?

[superrmatt]

It is poasible he was trying to get back together, but picked uo a vibe from you that you only wanted a friendship with him. Just speculation. Don't overthink it. Don't put too much energy into it, you both grew far apart over the years. Work on making friends though, that skill will get you farther than you can imagine.

[Shah11]

So basically you left your ex for new guy,
Now you left your new guy n want to go back to your ex?

Lol. You're funny. I'm sure your ex is dumbass if he wants you back 😂

[Asker]

No, I left my ex because he hurt me deeply, then I decided that I was ready to move on. I did make a mistake and messaged him while I was dating the new guy when I was 21, I’ve grown since then as a person. That Is why I apologized to him. I had no interest in getting back with my ex. I only apologized and he offered to be friends. That was a very mean response.

[Asker]

I also left the new guy because I was being emotionally and physically abused for 3 years. I had to place a restraining order on him.

[Shah11]

Why apologize after 3 years?
Why apologize after breakup with new guy? by the way you're the one ignored your ex text when you are in relationship. No?

Than why all of sudden this apologize drama. ?

[Asker]

Well why I apologized after 3 years is because I was in a relationship for 3 years. I was able to grow more as a person and realize more errors in my ways in the past. He reached out to me during that time as well and i I didn’t respond because I didn’t know how , so I felt it in me to reach out to him. We did spend 4 years together in a major part of our lives and contributed to who we are as people today. We both know each other’s hearts and we both made one big mistake each, but we were young and learning. Why not be friends with someone who genuinely cares for you as a person, even after dating and heartache. Maybe that might not be something you understand yet.

[Shah11]

Lol. You can be friend with your ex even when you're in relationship. Anyways if your intention is nice than you will have great friendship.

[The-Wise-Phoenix]

I don't know the circumstances of your break up but generally (Men don't have girls as friends). If he was the one who ended the relationship my guess is he was trying to let you down easy.
But again I don't know who ended it.