In my experience women aren’t the great communicators that they are stereotyped to be.
I had an ex once tell me she was okay with me going out to a coffee shop on a sunny day instead of mowing the lawn, but then was upset later and yelled at me because I should have known “by her eyes” that she really meant “no.” And that because I couldn’t tell it’s proof that our relationship is in jeopardy.
Not all women are like your ex She is also bad at communicatiins I ahte women who give such excuses, its just childish and stupid Im always honest, better bitter truth than sweet lies for me
Want a man in tune with emotions? Find yourself a guy with a Pisces moon. No one teaches us to read body language, the few of us who can had to make the effort to learn ourselves or intuitive. Also as men traditionally we provide & protect. We were defenders & emotions in the face of certain death gets a man killed.
0
0 Reply
Anonymous
(45 Plus)
1 y
Do you hit deaf people when they can't hear you?
Get it into your head. We evolved SPEECH for a reason.
"I would think my overall tone and body language would make it fairly obvious how I’m feeling."
Well it doesn't. You're 30. You should have figured this out by now especially since every man in your life has probably said it. We're not mind readers. If you want us to know something, speak up.
Generally speaking, most guys are not emotional people and have no references or experiences with it. Most also have little patience for it. Ignorance is bliss sometimes in regards to female drama (especially if between females).
And did I mention, once a guy gets in the middle of the drama, there is no positive outcome…. The guy won’t know what to say and will likely agitate you more in the long run.
You ask that question at 30. You will ask it at 40. And 50, and it stops at some point. When you realize that you are gifted a household item from your husband, or non gifted by your kids, who have no idea what to give you, you start realizing that just their presence is enough. There is no perfect gift other than presence. At some point the gift is simply cake and ice cream, or going out for dinner. Once you get to that point, us being clueless is out the door.
Lol yeah, guys aren’t wizards.. we don’t just magically know what’s wrong with you. This is why I always say women are probably the worst communicators of humans. You expect us to know exactly what you are thinking. When you want, instead of just saying how you feel! But straight up. We call thay playing games. And we as men are too grown for that nonsense. Say what you mean, mean what you say.
I found what worked better than hitting them with a blunt object. You must hit them bluntly with your intentions, that is the only way they understand.
It's a good thing men have hearts nowadays because back in the day women respected men enough to not hit them at all. Probably because men would hit them back
Thinking emotions makes it impossible to think about the consequences of you actions. But I'm not saying women shouldn't be emotional because men wouldn't love them if they acted like us.
If you act like a man, men will just ghost you duh. Lol imagine if you dated a guy and one day he decided to wear a dress and heals and he started acting feminine, you would just leave. Women don't want feminine men so why do you think men have to put with a masculine woman.
Because penises are ugly to you, if you or any girl send me a pussy pics I will instantly get hard because I like looking at vagina, where as you guys don't like looking at penises
@chris_987 -BEEP- wrong! It's not that a penis is ugly, it's who the penis belongs to. I could not care less for a stranger showing his private parts to me. It's weird to me. I'm looking for something longterm and if a stranger sends me that it's just a complete turnoff because he's just interested in a hookup. I appreciate the honesty, but you could just use words. These are not just dick pics, they are are UNWANTED dick pics.
If you were my boyfriend, I would not mind it, as long as you put it to use later today ;)
But the vagina is just a thing, men can just get turned on by looking at a body part of a woman. While women need to see the man's personality. So it makes sense why a penis by itself would do nothing for you.
Because you guys see the dick and don't want to get to know the person, where as men see the pussy and want to get to know the person.
As women are with us often. Several possibilities. We aren't women, so if you don't communicate your feelings (which women can be bad for not doing sometimes), we'll just assume everything is alright. Sometimes guys will pick up on them but not want to "open that can of worms" lol. Or, depending on the guy and how he feels (or doesn't) about you, simply not care enough.
0
2 Reply
Opinion Owner
1 y
"overall tone and body language would make it fairly obvious how I’m feeling" - NEVER assume this. You women are often too subtle with things, and you have to remember we have our own lives and problems, so the focus isn't always solely on you and what you "might" be feeling or not. Like I say, communication is key and huge! Not "tones" and body language.
I think that younger guys are somewhat clueless so you girls seriously should give them a break and some time. I know that I was in my teens and 20's I really didn't grow up until after High School when I joined the military guys may be a little slow on the uptake in relationships when younger but as we age we learn everything from the girl he is with trust me and I spent 18 years of my life in the military.
No, it's not. Communication is being direct and concise so that what you say cannot possibly be misinterpreted.
I don't and I will never respect anyone who fails to communicate in such a way because it only makes them look like they hate being responsible for the things they say and wish to maintain a degree of plausible deniability.
It’s entirely possible you are among the few who legitimately hold that view, but it would seem to be uncommon. One internet site is a small sample size to be fair, but there seems to be uniform agreement among the target demographic.
Most guys do not think from an emotional point of view. If you need consultation, you're much better off directly asking for it than putting on a show.
Surely after all this time you realise men can't read body language like women can, we genuinely can't. We can still open glass jars etc for you though.
Men just fundamentally have lower amounts of empathy. I reckon that's an evolutionary trait. Women have higher empathy so they are better at taking care of children. Men have lower empathy so they can make the hard decisions easier.
Empathy is the understanding of others, being able to place yourself in their position and relate to their circumstances. This is fundamentally how we interpret body language as well, we recognize the state someone would be in to show that body language.
I wish I had a girlfriend. I'd know exactly what to say I think. "How are you feeling?" What's troubling you?" And then just listen and not offer advice, but be 100% present. That's all you really want isn't it?
Why do girls expect guys too read tier minds? We don't know what's going on up there, believe it or not. Just tell us for a change. How about that. Would help everyone along.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
88Opinion
In my experience women aren’t the great communicators that they are stereotyped to be.
I had an ex once tell me she was okay with me going out to a coffee shop on a sunny day instead of mowing the lawn, but then was upset later and yelled at me because I should have known “by her eyes” that she really meant “no.” And that because I couldn’t tell it’s proof that our relationship is in jeopardy.
Just because she says she’s ok doesn’t mean she is. It’s like the I’m fine response when I’m reality you’re not.
Not all women are like your ex
She is also bad at communicatiins
I ahte women who give such excuses, its just childish and stupid
Im always honest, better bitter truth than sweet lies for me
Want a man in tune with emotions? Find yourself a guy with a Pisces moon. No one teaches us to read body language, the few of us who can had to make the effort to learn ourselves or intuitive. Also as men traditionally we provide & protect. We were defenders & emotions in the face of certain death gets a man killed.
Do you hit deaf people when they can't hear you?
Get it into your head. We evolved SPEECH for a reason.
"I would think my overall tone and body language would make it fairly obvious how I’m feeling."
Well it doesn't. You're 30. You should have figured this out by now especially since every man in your life has probably said it. We're not mind readers. If you want us to know something, speak up.
Generally speaking, most guys are not emotional people and have no references or experiences with it. Most also have little patience for it. Ignorance is bliss sometimes in regards to female drama (especially if between females).
And did I mention, once a guy gets in the middle of the drama, there is no positive outcome…. The guy won’t know what to say and will likely agitate you more in the long run.
Why would you want your guy in the drama anyway?
You ask that question at 30. You will ask it at 40. And 50, and it stops at some point. When you realize that you are gifted a household item from your husband, or non gifted by your kids, who have no idea what to give you, you start realizing that just their presence is enough. There is no perfect gift other than presence. At some point the gift is simply cake and ice cream, or going out for dinner. Once you get to that point, us being clueless is out the door.
Lol yeah, guys aren’t wizards.. we don’t just magically know what’s wrong with you. This is why I always say women are probably the worst communicators of humans. You expect us to know exactly what you are thinking. When you want, instead of just saying how you feel! But straight up. We call thay playing games. And we as men are too grown for that nonsense. Say what you mean, mean what you say.
I found what worked better than hitting them with a blunt object. You must hit them bluntly with your intentions, that is the only way they understand.
It's a good thing men have hearts nowadays because back in the day women respected men enough to not hit them at all. Probably because men would hit them back
@chris_987 I don't understand how you can hit someone and not expect them to retaliate.
Thinking emotions makes it impossible to think about the consequences of you actions. But I'm not saying women shouldn't be emotional because men wouldn't love them if they acted like us.
@chris_987 If I act like a man, you should treat me as one. No joke, I once asked a friend to punch me in the stomach. Instant regret.
If you act like a man, men will just ghost you duh. Lol imagine if you dated a guy and one day he decided to wear a dress and heals and he started acting feminine, you would just leave. Women don't want feminine men so why do you think men have to put with a masculine woman.
@chris_987 Right! If I want a feminine partner, I will look for a woman instead, they do that better.
Go luck cause most women are masculine nowadays lol
@chris_987 In my group of girls I can only think of one!
You can go for her then
@chris_987 No, I'm straight!
Why? girls naked are the best thing
@chris_987 Because men naked are the best thing
I don't know girls hate dick pics
@chris_987 Yes we do. Do you know why?
Because penises are ugly to you, if you or any girl send me a pussy pics I will instantly get hard because I like looking at vagina, where as you guys don't like looking at penises
@chris_987 -BEEP- wrong! It's not that a penis is ugly, it's who the penis belongs to. I could not care less for a stranger showing his private parts to me. It's weird to me. I'm looking for something longterm and if a stranger sends me that it's just a complete turnoff because he's just interested in a hookup. I appreciate the honesty, but you could just use words. These are not just dick pics, they are are UNWANTED dick pics.
If you were my boyfriend, I would not mind it, as long as you put it to use later today ;)
Yeah I don't care who the vagina belongs too. Because too look at a vagina is amazing. Like the lips and and the clit especially if it's an innie
Bingo!! Why guys don’t get this is beyond me! I love big beautiful dicks by someone I love and have a bond with. Stranger dicks though? Stuff off!
Thanks for backing me up!
@chris_987 If you ever see a guy ask this question, spread the word, help us out :)
But the vagina is just a thing, men can just get turned on by looking at a body part of a woman. While women need to see the man's personality. So it makes sense why a penis by itself would do nothing for you.
Because you guys see the dick and don't want to get to know the person, where as men see the pussy and want to get to know the person.
As women are with us often. Several possibilities. We aren't women, so if you don't communicate your feelings (which women can be bad for not doing sometimes), we'll just assume everything is alright. Sometimes guys will pick up on them but not want to "open that can of worms" lol. Or, depending on the guy and how he feels (or doesn't) about you, simply not care enough.
"overall tone and body language would make it fairly obvious how I’m feeling" - NEVER assume this. You women are often too subtle with things, and you have to remember we have our own lives and problems, so the focus isn't always solely on you and what you "might" be feeling or not. Like I say, communication is key and huge! Not "tones" and body language.
Is it obvious to you with guys?
I think that younger guys are somewhat clueless so you girls seriously should give them a break and some time. I know that I was in my teens and 20's I really didn't grow up until after High School when I joined the military guys may be a little slow on the uptake in relationships when younger but as we age we learn everything from the girl he is with trust me and I spent 18 years of my life in the military.
For being the gender that is allegedly better at communicating, you do a surprisingly shit job at communicating.
Communication with body language is communication.
No, it's not.
Communication is being direct and concise so that what you say cannot possibly be misinterpreted.
I don't and I will never respect anyone who fails to communicate in such a way because it only makes them look like they hate being responsible for the things they say and wish to maintain a degree of plausible deniability.
@kypax
Exactly. Never heard it laid out this way, but very true.
Because if we DID get emotional like you, you would hold it against us as a weakness. That's why.
Facts.
That's the sad truth
I certainly wouldn’t. A man in touch with his emotions is healthy.
It’s entirely possible you are among the few who legitimately hold that view, but it would seem to be uncommon. One internet site is a small sample size to be fair, but there seems to be uniform agreement among the target demographic.
"Oh my God, my cat, Boo Boo Kitty, coughed up a hairball this morning."
Emotional for a woman, not the slightest bit interesting for a man.
Lol.
Most guys do not think from an emotional point of view. If you need consultation, you're much better off directly asking for it than putting on a show.
Surely after all this time you realise men can't read body language like women can, we genuinely can't. We can still open glass jars etc for you though.
Men just fundamentally have lower amounts of empathy. I reckon that's an evolutionary trait. Women have higher empathy so they are better at taking care of children. Men have lower empathy so they can make the hard decisions easier.
What’s that got to do with understanding body communication?
Empathy is the understanding of others, being able to place yourself in their position and relate to their circumstances. This is fundamentally how we interpret body language as well, we recognize the state someone would be in to show that body language.
AHhh yes.. This is exactly how guys feel when their women get behind the wheel of a car!
All it means is our brains are wired up differently.
I wish I had a girlfriend. I'd know exactly what to say I think. "How are you feeling?" What's troubling you?" And then just listen and not offer advice, but be 100% present. That's all you really want isn't it?
I understand your frustration, but at the same time I could ask you why are you so damn emotional?
Estrogen.
Would be fair if I called that toxic femininity?
Why do girls expect guys too read tier minds? We don't know what's going on up there, believe it or not. Just tell us for a change. How about that. Would help everyone along.