Is he just going back to his ex because he knows he can't have me?

[Anonymous]

I have this friend at work and we are really close. We first met when we are both in relationships with other people.

I thought he was cute and over time my attraction towards him became wrong and was starting to go too far so I pulled away from are friendship out of respect for my boyfriend and my friends girlfriend.

He was asking about me and my boyfriend one day and then he just told me but him and his girlfriend broke up as if it was something he had to tell me even though it's not my business and it wasn't really relevant. He waited 3 months to tell me but they had broken up.

Everytime we work together he's super happy about it and will try and talk to me loads. We are really good friends and get on really well so it's hard to ignore him.

He told me about why he broke up with his girlfriend and it sounded like she was a little controlling and emotionally abusive with him. Just seems so strange but someone as attractive as him has such low self-esteem and doesn't realise he's really attractive and his girlfriend isn't really that attractive if I'm honest.

Whilst they'd broke up he went abit depressive even though he said he was happy about the break up and wanted to live life etc. He came to me for someone to vent to. I was still pretty stand offish with him because I know I have a thing for him.

Next thing I know he's back with his ex after from what it sounds like she tracked him down on tinder after realising no one else was gonna put up with her shit.

I told him before he got back with her that he was a really nice, handsome lad and he could get a nice girl if he wanted and he said he couldn't get the girl he wanted whatever that means.

I got a little scared because I wasn't sure if he was referring to me. There definitely Is a strong bond between us but I'm trying to turn into a stister, brother kind of relationship not a will they won't they situation

Updates

1 y

He really likes my boyfriend too and really wants to be his friend to but I've been honest with my boyfriend about how Im attracted to this other guy abit and I think he doesn't like him for that reason. I think he respects but I'm in a relationship and I'm happy and he knows I'm treated well and doesn't want to ruin that for me because he is secretly loves me and wants the best for me as fucked up as that may sound

[LimitedBenefits101]

"he's really attractive and his girlfriend isn't really that attractive if I'm honest." LOL thats the jealous coochie talking right there but anyways why do u want a guy that keeps getting back to his ex?

I'm so shocked and surprised your actual boyfriend is still with you even tho you told him you are attracted to that guy.

How can he still keep a chick that told him she's attracted to other guy? something wrong with your boyfriend tbh.

[Asker]

Yet I bet you've had celebrity crushes , work crushes etc. You telling me you don't look at other women bullshit.

My boyfriend tells me if he finds another woman attractive doesn't mean he's gonna sleep with them

[LimitedBenefits101]

Lol celeb crushes and work crushes are HUGE different but you already what you doing are wrong but are in denial because of your attractiveness to your co worker. But i'm blaming your deluded boyfriend for keeping you around

[Asker]

Right let me hear you say again "work crushes are HUGE different" yet it's wrong for me to personally have a work crush

[LimitedBenefits101]

Dude you compared work crushes to damn CELEBRITY crushes, are you also deluded like your boyfriend? yeah it seems so

[Asker]

You literally just said "lol celeb crushes and work crushes are HUGE different" now saying "Dude you compared work crushes to damn CELEBRITY crushes" you also put them in the same category as each other.

Make your mind up

[LimitedBenefits101]

You have major issues, we are done.

[Asker]

was that the best you could come back with because you relisted you were talking shit

[spartan55]

Damn, you sure everything is about you.

[Asker]

I know it sounds conceited when you say it like that. But why the hell would he say all that stuff about being happy he broke up with his girlfriend and then but he couldn't get the girl he wanted and then suddenly go back to his emotionally abusive ex

[Asker]

I'm also the only female friend he has

[spartan55]

I mean, if that's the way you want to look at it to scoreboard him, then great. I don't get why this matters to you, like at all.

[Asker]

Because I don't want a friend of mine going back to abusive ex just because of he thinks he can't do better. I told him he's stupid for going back to her and she'll just treat him like shit again. He said things changed and they are happy together.

She has no respect for him and thinks it's all about her feelings not his

[spartan55]

That's his business.

[Asker]

It is now and I'm letting him get on with it. I'm not gonna be there the next time for him

[spartan55]

Let's be honest here, you are just pissed because your 'friend' won't be around to be your emotional support anymore.

[Asker]

I don't need any emotional support I'm pretty good in my life have a fantastic boyfriend, great family, okayish job and amazing friends

[spartan55]

Riiiight.

[spartan55]

Substitute 'give you attention' for emotional support then.

[Asker]

Like I said before don't need is attention either got a bunch of other people in my life who I get that from

[spartan55]

Whatever you say.

[Asker]

That's right whatever I say. You don't even know me

[spartan55]

I know what you've told me, and that's more than enough to form an opinion.

[Asker]

What did I tell you?

[spartan55]

That you are full of yourself, you don't care about your boyfriend's feelings etc etc.

[Asker]

Okay why don't you fuck my boyfriend you seem to care about him so much more than i do

[spartan55]

Hahaha, classy. Maybe take a look in the mirror at how you act and think everything is all about you... just a thought.

[Asker]

I think me and you enjoy argument don't we 🤣 I'm actually laughing now. Your so bitchy love it. Who's having the last word

[spartan55]

'Bitchy' says the girl saying another girl isn't attractive...😂 😂

[Asker]

To be fair she isn't

[Asker]

She's not very nice either by the sounds of it either

[spartan55]

Isn't that something that can stand on its own though, without you pointing it out?

[Asker]

Well the question was about hi going back to his ex. I had to provide some context for it to make sense as to why I don't think it's a good idea.

She doesn't let him have friends yet only wants to see him once a week when she has no job. is that not concerning to you.

What am I meant to say me and my friends don't want are other friend going back to his ex yet she's a wonderful person and so beautiful. That would be a lie sorry I don't lie.

How would you know she was a bad person in the question if I didn't say that.