He unblocked me but not texting?

[Anonymous]

A guy friend and myself got into a massive fight and we both hit each others sore spots.. a lot. I had to ask a friend of his to ask him to unblock me and talk later to discuss because I didn't want to end things on bad terms..

I actually didn't want to end things at all and try to rebuild a friendship but most of my friends have said it seems near impossible to repair.

I have the option to reach out and apologise but he might still be very highly emotional. I am not sure what to do. After I asked him to unblock me I had hope he just needed space but friends say he might want to move on from me.

What does it mean if he unblocks me and should I still send an apology to him? It has been 2 days since we fought.. this is also a very bad fight.. did not end well

Updates

+1 y

Thank you everyone for helping me! I have never been in a fight like this, it's hard to know what to do. My option will be to wait a month and make contact with him, if he does not want to talk I will let it go.

Thanks again!

[Guy13]

Friendship problems are common and do not have to mean an end to the relationship. It is obvious that there was time taken to "cool off" and now the channels of communication are open again. This implies a distinct willingness to talk.

What's the chances that you two can go ahead and confront this IN PERSON? What about some reflection on what happened? Owning and apologizing for your individual behaviors whether verbal or written? Address what was the turning point?, describe how you feel and what you want without getting defensive?

This is not an overnight thing when one is rebuilding a relationship... don't rush it but someone needs to start the process?

[Asker]

He disabled his account but he unblocked me anyway. I have other ways to contact him but I think space is the best thing right now. He seems very hurt.. he has been playing a game for 12 hours straight and no sleep. I am guessing his taking his mind off everything that has happened

[Guy13]

Oh, I see. This is still kind of fresh and raw. We humans are a mess.

[Asker]

Yeah.. I dont think he will talk to me about it though.. I will try next month to contact him and if he does not want anything I guess thats it

[Guy13]

Alright. Good luck 🍀 with it all

[Anonymous]

If you went out of your way to ask someone to ask him to unblock you so you can “talk later”, my guess is that he’s expecting you to take the next step and initiate. But I will say this — it’s been two days, not two weeks, months, or years. The most likely case is that everything is still fresh, and he may not be in a place to talk to you. I understand that you don’t want to end the friendship at all, but maybe if anything you need some space from each other, because in toxic situations this will not be the first or last altercation.

[Asker]

Thank you! I really appreciate your insight! 🙏 I had a plan to send him an apology within a week and see what happens. But knowing him he will be highly upset still. My guess is a month or two he should be ok. It was a highly toxic fight.. we both poked each others sore spots.. it was a horrible fight. But yes he and I need space..

[Opinion Owner]

No problem! And I know space is hard but if your fight was as explosive as it sounds then I don't know if even 2 months is enough. Sure you may feel a bit better and try to reconcile, but there are deeper issues at hand that take real time to heal. I had a best friend of 15 years, and so many times we fought and needed space but just couldn’t stay away from each other. We had to literally get into an argument so hurtful that it forced us to now spend time apart, and this just happened this past August. I say this to tell you not to waste years giving each other chance after chance when you need space. You’ll find yourselves in a irreconcilable place and that can be avoided if you give each other the proper time apart right now while it’s most important.

[Asker]

The thing is he unblocked me, and he wants me to take initiative.. i dont know when would be the best time to message him. I told his friend to tell me to come and message me when he is ready. Usually he doesn't hold grudges.. but is was explosive.. so I would imagine 3 months.. at best.. it was an awful fight.. I feel so bad.. I know he needs space and I am fighting myself to keep away

[Asker]

I wanted to get back to you as what you said was true. Everything worked out in the end. It took us 1 year to get back to how we were and we reconciled 6 months after the fight. It is funny because it feels like nothing really changed between us and he still enjoys talking with me. And likewise also. He is showing signs of change too and is trying to be more respectful towards me and I am too also changing my behaviour. I honestly didn't think he would ever talk to me. We were inseperatable until that point. But long story short thank you so much, again. Your comment was the words of wisdom and the calming that I needed to just let things be.

[Opinion Owner]

Oh that’s great! Looks like I didn’t get a chance to respond to your last comment so I apologize for that, but I’m glad you two were able to talk things out and squash the drama!☺️

[spartan55]

Be honest, do both of you need to apologize, or are you the primary offender?

[Asker]

Both.. I know I done wrong.. and he also done wrong too.. We both played off on each others sore spots and caused a lot of toxicity.. we both didn't realise we needed space away from each other. But he is more unforgiving than me.. so I am worried he won't forgive me but him unblocking gives me alittle hope

[spartan55]

So, why not swallow your ego and apologize first?