Is it a manipulation game or is he just not into me?

[ToxicoLuluz]

So I have been this guy for 6 months. In the beginning he was always making time for me, and showed a lot of interest in me and everything however I was always the one to initiate communicating but he would always plan to see me etc. Then he started acting a bit different, like I wasn’t a priority and kinda like he wanted ME to chase HIM. I’m always putting in most of the effort communication wise. He would tell me he would want to hangout on certain days and then I wouldn’t hear from him on that day until after he would tell me that he was actually busy and he’s sorry. I know for a fact that he does have a lot going on and he is a busy person that has a lot on his plate responsibility wise so I never took it to heart, life happens and at least he was trying to make time. We went a few weeks without seeing each other or talking much, but he ended up asking me to hangout and we did finally, when we hangout he is so loving and attentive, and acts like he really likes me. He told me he has just been very busy and didn’t have much time to spend with me, but he’s going to stop being as busy soon so he will have more time. He mentioned that he felt like I wasn’t communicating enough with him like messaging him enough, which is strange because I’m the one that always initiates everything, he rarely messages first. I then asked him twice to meet up with me, once he told me he was already hanging out with his friends and couldn’t so I said we can another time. I have tried to make plans with him again and he said that we possibly could meet up as long as his friends don’t want to do something with him that night. I thought that was rude. This last time I saw him was amazing we had such a good time together he even ask that I don’t sleep with anyone else, and he told me “I’ll always come back to you” but then after that time hanging out he ghosted me for weeks. I don’t understand this man or what he is thinking.

[xColinx]

It sounds like you're a convenient option for him when he's in the mood but otherwise you're not a priority for him. I'm not trying to be mean, just calling it like I see it based on his behavior.

Like the other poster said, I'd suggest you back off and see if he cares enough to 'chase' you... or at least make some small effort to initiate things from his end.

A separate question - do you ever hang out with him when he's with his friends or does he try to avoid that scenario?

[ToxicoLuluz]

I don’t see it as mean, I am looking for real opinions because when you have feelings for someone you can get blinded and I feel I’ve been wasting my time and I don’t want to waste anymore if I shouldn’t be. I have met one of his friends, and he has invited me to hangout with him and his friends once but it was very late and I live far so I didn’t go.

[xColinx]

Good point about the possibility of becoming blinded... that's happened to me in the past. I think you have good instincts about the situation - he's taking you for granted and it's not what you want/deserve.

You could either try to bring up the topic directly with him, or just do it with your actions (by taking a step back and seeing how he reacts).

[xColinx]

Do you think he'd be open to a direct conversation about the overall situation?

[slatyb]

You understand fine, but you don't want to. Stop wasting your time. You aren't a priority for him. Find a man who wants to be with you as much as you want to be with him.

[spartan55]

Girls are so hyper sensitive about appearing desperate. THIS is desperate.

[Crafteroon]

Have you told him how his behavior has made you feel?

[Guy13]

You are a great second/fallback option.

[Iron_Man]

Let him Chase you for once