Is this even healthy friendship with a guy?

[Caramelpie]

my previous coworker who is my friend now confessed that he has feelings for me more than a friend. I told him he can’t feel that way about me since I am with someone already and pregnant. Yet he said he is very aware of my situation but he can’t control how he feels and he won’t let it get in the way of our friendship. He promised to not act on them but seems like he started to get jealous whenever I kiss my boyfriend, talk to him, hug him or do anything together. He doesn’t say a word about it but I can see it all over his face.

[loveslongnails]

He was selfish and stupid to confess his feelings to you. If he REALLY cared about you, he'd have shut his mouth and gotten over it. What GOOD did it do anyone by him spilling his guts? Did he think you would somehow jump ship because you really want to be with him instead of where you are?

He said it won't get in the way of your friendship, but that's EXACTLY what confessing to you did!! He's already ACTED ON IT and put you in a very uncomfortable position. Confessing to you was ACTING ON HIS FEELINGS!! My advice is wean this guy out of your life, circle, radar, whatever you call it.

[dynamicyandere]

As long as he respects your relationship boundaries, it’s alright. You may want to tell your SO about it too for full transparency. As for your friend, it’s best that he find a way to accept the situation and let go. Otherwise it’s going to be quite hard on him to watch you with someone else. Some healthy distance and time would be good so that those feelings of jealousy don’t grow overbearing. He can’t turn off his feelings. But with enough time and distance, those feelings will subside. Like waiting for a bonfire to go out on it’s own.

[Alchemizt]

No, that's not healthy. If I was in his situation I would have kept quiet and done my best to keep a distance so that I can get over the feelings. I don't even get it as to why he would confess after seeing that you're pregnant. It won't be easy for him to manage a friendship since he has feelings for you, so he'll often get jealous when he sees you with your boyfriend.

[NathanDavis]

that is not healthy at all... and it's not genuine either

just the fact that he made it for you to know and to be aware of this is problematic enough

and he's not being a friend either, he is being selfish and careless

[Tstrbrainer]

You guys are in a tricky place.

He can't get over you quickly it'll take time, sometimes a lot of it.

But as long as he respect your private life, it's good.

Try being extra careful with him so as to not give him any signs that you share his interst

[Sevenpointfive]

i wouldn't count the guy out just yet. he might genuinely want a friendship with you if he can't have anything else. i'm speaking from experience. some people are worth knowing while others are just crushes

[Anonymous]

No I wouldn't say that is a friendship that can last anymore. It's very hard to stay friends if you tell someone you like them. I did that once but it just became awkward to talk to them after so it just became to difficult to maintain. I wasn't even jealous of her partner. I didn't know she had one at the time. I was happy for her tbh. But that's just very awkward afterwards to maintain.

But with him being jealous of you for it I dont think it will be maintainable anymore.

[spartan55]

What are you doing? Is the cheap ego boost worth it? So gross

[Mayo503]

For your boyfriend sake think you need to end it…. And for the baby too
It’s not fair on any of them ….
He got feels for you ….
But it’s up to you …?
What do you think you should do

[ThomasDavid1989]

No such thing as "just friends", with the opposite sex

IF YOU'RE STRAIGHT

[CubaPirate]

No he seems rather obsessive try to keep contact to a minimum

[msc545]

So dump him. No fixing this.