Why dont men date single mothers?

[Akam93]

Men dont date single mothers mostly because they hate kids or to much baggage for them. Heck they won't even give them sex. I've seen some single mothers who haven't had a man in years unless your really pretty.

[LiamJHayden]

It really depends upon the guy and the girl. Some guys flat out will not. Others might depending upon the circumstances. People might disagree, but to me there is a huge difference between a girl who married her high school sweetheart and was widowed and one who has never been married and has four children all from different guys.

[Tellme]

I’d be very happy to date a single mom. That’s absolutely no problem at all.

[EricSummer]

I wanted to date a single mom recently. However, she was really pretty, so I suppose I'm still within the limits of your question.

I also have two tennage kids who live with their mum, so it would be a bit strange if I excluded kids for a potential partner.

Still, when I was in my twenties or early thirties and had not yet had any kids of my own I would have preferred a woman in the same situation.

It also makes a huge difference if you still want to have kids. A boyfriend can be just for the mum and have almost nothing to do with the kid. As soon as there is a shared kid, he must be a father to all.

[Gent207-2]

Wow so much to unpack here
1st. Dating a single mom is hard, even if you love kids like me. You are not just getting to know her, but her kids and her family. That is A LOT for any good man to take on. Anyone who says otherwise is a liar or has bad intentions.
2.) The departure of mother or father by death or choice leaves a family significantly broken. So it's little to no wonder single mothers struggle so much with dating. There is just so much to unpack and so little time to unpack it.
3.) It takes a special kind of specimen to love, provide for kids that aren't theirs and even more importantly to resist the urge to wish that you had your own.

You don't want just any run-of-the-mill man around you or your kids.

[Anonymous]

A number of men will date single mothers. But a lot of us won’t. I won’t anymore because it was nothing but a headache. Plus she didn’t want to have sex till marriage. Which is her choice but given the fact that you let some other dude knock you up 2 times w out marriage now I have to wait. I have to prove myself to you. She says she doesn’t want a father for her kids cause they have one, even though he wasn’t helping her w a damn thing. But I’m still expected to order food for everyone, to provide a roof over their head to which I’m supposed to pay. Most woman who are in that situation aren’t looking for a romantic partner, they’re looking for a partner to help w everything they have to deal w.

[HighValue]

It is not hating kids. Actually, most men that are family oriented and want a family/kids of their own are the ones that avoid single mothers the most.

Single mothers often make bad life decisions and are often bad parents. Over 90% of convicted criminals grew up in single mother households.

Why would a quality man take on extra stress and expenses that are not from his own decisions, but are from the mistakes of the mother's decisions?

Why would he want kids that would be less likely to follow rules in his house?

It would also mean that she has contact with an ex, and she has much less time available to spend with the new man.

THE ONLY men that should date a single mother is a single father.

[Anonymous]

Any male going with a single mom has to be okay being a step dad
He's liking going to be paying for this other man's child,
he's likely going to come second as the kid is number one in mom's eyes,
he likely can't discipline the kid without fear of retaliation,
a false accusation from the kid could ruin his life,
the kid's father could create drama,
as the man he loses the primary privilege of having sole access to his partners womb, basically getting another man's leftovers,
Women that leave the men they have children with are more likely to make poor decisions.
it's a huge red flag and major liability any way you cut it. If you're a single man DON'T date women with children you will likely regret it.

[RavVid]

Well it is not so much hate kids but we see no reason to be raising some other guys kid.

Also single mothers are not as available as single girls are; probably have to arrange a baby sitter etc.

And yeah not a good idea to even have sex with them because it is better to steer clear.

[art84]

My cousin was a single father who had three children and dated a women with three children. He married her and her children call him dad and now those children are grown up and entering college. It definitely takes a man to take in children who aren't his and provide for them. Some guys won't date single mothers for whatever reasons.

[CB-Raido-Time]

I don't hate children I absolutely love them adore them. Problem is and I speak for myself, I fear being around or even near children due to the stigma put on men somewhat like walking through a minefield never know when some accusation could occur and men face very harsh outcomes when that happens. As far a children go I would adopt if I could, but that's not even possible again it's the stigma placed on men.

[Reorx]

Pair bondings one reason, anothers how they usually get treated. We men observe & have no wish to become part of the hen-pecked fold. Would you say men are respected for doing this? Raising another mans kids as a direct cisequence of her poor choice/s. No, that guy gets ran over.

[Reorx]

Widows are different, they didn't ask for it.

[Fireguy17]

I have never had an issue dating women with kids unless the kids were being used as pawns in a crappy divorce.
Other than that it was fine.
I never tried to be their dad, as they already had one.