Are ‘walk in the park’ too casual? Does it mean he isn’t really interested in me?

[Anonymous]

He asked me put for a coffee date. After that he suggested we go on a walk another day. Is he too cheap?

Updates

+1 y

Asked me out*

[TooHot2Care]

Consider this : Dinner is high risk, decent reward and VERY easy to fumble.

Taking a girl out to dinner is a good way to seduce her and it’s also EXTREMELY easy to turn her off and fuck everything up.

I’ve had this happen to me, and sometimes it’s not even my fault and the girl was just weird (Felicia….).

The park is low stress, easy to get to know you and if you two vibe, you can always go someplace after.

Just say the magic words : “I’m hungry.”

[Asker]

I feel like maybe he wants a place for us to be alone and perhaps kiss?

[TooHot2Care]

Maybe. If the mood is right and the vibe is there, why not? All I’m saying is: if I kissed a girl and she said “I’m hungry” 5 minutes later, we’re getting food.

[Justmeagain1]

I feel that he is gauging you and trying to get to know you. I could be wrong. He may also be at a point in his life where time is important to him. You could always suggest something different and YOU could pay for a date - take him to like a panic room thing where you have to solve puzzles to get out in a certain amount of time- it would gauge his patience with difficult situations and additionally also give you an insight on what working together looks like for you and him. Nothing in any rule book that says he must pay for a date - step up girl! Eg - so I’ve booked a session at “insert name of place” just got to pick a time I’d love to grab a bite to eat with you and go attack this puzzle thing - it’s a fun date and it’s also showing interest and initiative.

[strateguy632]

to jus, good suggestions

[prettypretty10]

If he’s broke and can’t afford anything else there’s a possibility he could be into u just can’t do anything else

[Asker]

I don’t think he’s broke

[prettypretty10]

well girl i think u deserve better then.. do u really like him?

[Asker]

I am interested in him

[Juxtapose]

If you need a guy to pay you money just to have your company then you are a prostitute.

[prettypretty10]

no i just think dates are important in a relationship, and even my dad never let my mom pay anything it’s in our blood :))

[Juxtapose]

So the man has to make all the first moves, keep the conversation flowing and also pay for all the food? What the heck are you doing for him?

[Juxtapose]

arbiterz.com/.../

[Juxtapose]

33% of dates are going to be women trying to rip the guy off for food when she has no interest in him.

[prettypretty10]

u act like m forcing guys to do it for me 😭 i never ask for anything and they seem happy to be with me, plus m still studying m only 20

[prettypretty10]

and the type of people i date couldn’t care less about me taking money from them, they still have it anyways it’s not like they not eating at the end of the month lol

[Juxtapose]

It's the principle of it for me. There's nothing about you that makes you more worthy of receiving money than me just because you are a woman.

[prettypretty10]

thats your opinion

[Juxtapose]

Well how about you make me understand by telling me what about you is so much more special than me? Why do you deserve to get paid and I don't?

[prettypretty10]

if u had many guys asking to take u out to nice dates, would u choose the one who wants to chill at home with pizza and tv? And often they’re just broke / stingy so why would i want them 😭 If he’s broke but incredibly amazing it can be ok but i think a man who’s not hard working is not masculine enough for me

[Juxtapose]

Well as a bisexual guy, I don't care about work ethic or income so long as the shared domicile is reasonably clean and they pay their half of the rent.

Yes, I would want to go home and have some pizza. But TV is a little boring, I would bring Monopoly or something to spice it up.

[Juxtapose]

I think if possible going out swimming and then having a picnic would be a lot more fun and it doesn't even really cost much at all.

[Juxtapose]

But you do have a point, you are asked out by a bunch of people so you have plenty of options. Guys reeeaaalllly don't have that luxury so we don't dismiss people as superficially on average I believe.

[Juxtapose]

Most guys love no problem dating a girl who works at McDonald's or Walmart.

[Juxtapose]

*have no

[Leapfrog00]

He wants to make small talk, so he can find out your interests and what kind of person you are. Going on a date might be going too far right now. Going out for coffee, there's little risk of screwing it up. With a date, there are too many expectations on how the evening should go.

Go to coffee with him, because this will be a good opportunity to scope him out too. You can find out what you have in common and if you're compatible.

[Asker]

Does he mean he’s still unsure about it?

[Leapfrog00]

It's not that. It's more he's checking you out to see how compatible you are. If he asked you for coffee, he definitely likes you, so he's definitely sure.

[FilmGuy93]

That's not what that means at all. He's trying to meet you to see if he's interested in getting to know you better.

Don't be weird

[Asker]

Why is he already suggested new plans after the first date if we haven’t even met yet?

[FilmGuy93]

See my answer above.

[Asker]

Why can he know if he wants to see me again after the first date

[FilmGuy93]

He probably wants to give you a few chances to get to know you before he makes up his mind. Maybe he has a busy schedule and doesn't think he can give you enough time for a real conversation in one go.

[Asker]

Many people already based on first date if they want to continue to get to know the person

[FilmGuy93]

Have you already had your first date with this person?

[Asker]

Not yet but soon

[FilmGuy93]

Okay, so it's like I said before lol

Take a deep breath, don't overthink this stuff.

[Asker]

Anyway I asked him I asked him why he never post anything on his social media. Then he asked what kind of stuff I hopef to see from him. Is that flirty?
It’s sounds kinda suggestive lol

[FilmGuy93]

Stop overthinking things

[Asker]

Just answer that question

[FilmGuy93]

I decline to answer. Stop overthinking

[Pyrofox]

Its to clearly get to know you more. And since its not like you have been dating for months or years so its not like jump to the candle light dinner at one or the others place. Casual is better than jumping to sleeping together. At a certain point its like there's getting your feet wet, and then there is waist deep/love bombing.

[Asker]

Does he seem relly interested or mildly interested in your opinion?

[strateguy632]

to pyr, i agree with you. you deserve most helpful.

[Pyrofox]

Well go do the date and find out? 😵

[MementoMori777]

Don't crack, it might be a test, I was actually wanting to do this, it's the best way to find a woman with the best traits I think, if the date is more important than the time they spent then it's says a lot, but maybe he is just cheap cause he's broke.

[Asker]

He does work so I don’t think he’s broke. Does he seem interested?

[MementoMori777]

I don't know, cause I know nothing about him

[Adam1978]

No that is a good filter, give you time to really check if a relationship is suitable or not without making it about money. Do you share values, morales and aspirations? Does the chemistry work, do you enjoy each others company are you really attracted to the physical person and not the digital profile.

[Fireguy17]

Probably not.
Those are good low expectation dates.
Pretty low keyed and comfortable for both parties.
Kind of like lunch dates.
Also myself included and this is not directed at you but many times I and possibly he has been used for a lot of free meals.
Especially now, going out is not cheap.

[Asker]

So he could be very much interested in me?

[Fireguy17]

yes he could.
A walk in the park is pretty much just you two alone, together.

[Asker]

I feel like maybe he wants to get us alone so he can kiss me?

[Fireguy17]

One never knows, since this isn't your first date it might happen.

[richardcory]

Seems like a reasonable date. I like walking. Maybe he is cheap, but maybe he is wealthy enough that it doesn't matter to him. Maybe neither.

Personally I'd consider going for a walk to be a fun date, and I'd never show off wealth early on because I don't want a woman who just wants my money

[strateguy632]

no. a walk is a good way to date. walking together seeing and talking about stuff. if a lady ONLY wants free meals that is "taking advantage". instead some of each.

[Asker]

Do you think he want to go for a walk because of the privacy (for kissing etc)

[GoodEnoughThen]

A walk in the park is a perfect date. It gives you time to do nothing but spend time together and talking to each other perfect compatibility test with no distractions.

[slatyb]

If your judge of a man is how much he's willing to spend on you, then he's right to be cautious.

[Asker]

Why are guys soo cautious nowadays?

[Juxtapose]

Because we're sick of being used for our money when you women don't contribute money to us.

[Juxtapose]

I'm not a damn piggy bank, get a job if you're that hard up.

[Summeroflove]

LMFAO… It seems like a nice date to get to know each other. What’s wrong with that? If you don’t wanna go then don’t.

[Reorx]

I don't know him but I know me. The parks one of my favorite places & if I ask a girl to come there with me thats very significant; right up there with meeting Mom.

[Asker]

Lol are you serious? How walk in the park is up there..

[Reorx]

Because it's a very special place to me, also a good way to weed out gold diggers :p

[Reorx]

The park for me is like church. I know that may not make sense to you but it's true. I love nature bird watching, walks etc.. I grew up going to this park.

[Asker]

Is woman gold digger if she doesn’t want low effort date from a guy?

[Reorx]

I did not mean to offend you; this is something that men worry about, especially when you see so many women on social media laughing about using men for free dinner dates.

[Asker]

by the way if guy often flirts with me (says mildly suggestive thinks often) is he really interested?

[Reorx]

Hard to tell, flirting could be just having fun, or it could be more. Is there eye contact? Does he follow up with touch? Want to know for sure get him alone sometime & see if he makes a move:) What he's doing is planting ideas in your head to grow so you think about him in that way. He seems to be interesting in one thing anyway.

[Juxtapose]

This is why: https://arbiterz.com/33-of-women-go-on-dates-for-free-food-study-claims/

[RavVid]

I think you should accept low key dates as a starting point.

[Asker]

Why guys often suggest those though?

[RavVid]

Well things have moved on from meeting people face to face and feeling a spark, to swiping left or right. Plus times are harder and women earn similar to men.

I think a coffee date is broadly the equivalent to that yesteryear initial meeting at a dance or something. From a man's perspective, if you are genuinely interested in him then you would happy to meet on these small dates rather than think cheapskate.

I think that is the point. From a dating app you just have a vague idea of what someone looks like.

[Asker]

So he wants to gauge how interested I am in him and how I really look like?

[RavVid]

And how you both interact too I would say. We have all had experience of meeting someone and getting along like a house on fire or it being more a slow burn or being a dud interaction.

With a dating app you'd just get that the person is attractive from a carefully selected pic.

[osoli]

You have to ask your self, do you want a guy that takes you for walks instead of dinners. Because going out for dinner is also not a big deal for some guys

[Sparkie460]

He wants to keep it casual with you. Just you and him walking, talking, maybe holding hands. I've had a few dates like this and they went very well.

[Asker]

Why would he want to keep it casual?

[Sparkie460]

So he can get to know you better

[SirJohn42]

I believe the oppisite here. He is wanting to find out your interests and hold a casual conversation.
He wants to know what you are thinking about. He is wanting to know you more.

[shades777]

If you want him for his money it definitely shows, thats what the park date does, you don't even mention if your actually interested in him as a person

[Ironic_Method]

Too cheap because he doesn't want to buy you things?

[In_Trance]

I'd cancel the date if I knew that you thought that way

[Asker]

Why?

[In_Trance]

To materialistic for my liking and for that reason I'm out

[Jamie05rhs]

I'm sorry, but what the hell is wrong with a walk in the park?

[007kingifrit]

it doesn't mean any such thing, if you want to do more ask

[Twalli]

He may not want to spend a bunch on a relationship that might not work out

[Nikki1989]

Nothing wrong with that.

[Asker]

Why do you think so?

[Anonymous]

Why do you think that? Don't be so quick to judge him.

[spartan55]

Careful, your entitled attitude is showing.

[DermalPunch]

He wants to make out.

[Asker]

Why do you think so?

[DermalPunch]

Because that's what people do in parks. There is nothing else to do but sit and stare at each other. Unless you will be doing squats. He is going to see if he can get physical. Don't. It's a test/trap to see how far he can get with as little investment as possible. If it's the day, he could genuinely want to chat but I doubt it.

[Asker]

So I should kiss him only after dinner date, is that what you’re saying?

[DermalPunch]

Why should you kiss him at all?

[sheikalana]

He's just trying to get to know you.

[Asker]

So you don’t think he’s being cheap

[sheikalana]

How is that being cheap? And what were you expecting? A yacht party? Seems like you're having really high expectations and you guys are not even dating yet.

[Asker]

What do you consider dating? I feel like if we’re spending time together we’re dating

[sheikalana]

I spend time with my friends and we're not dating. Dating for me is when there's physical contact the stage before dating to me is the talking stage or the getting to know each other stage.

[Asker]

Do you mean physical contact if you’re kissed or sex?

[sheikalana]

Mainly kissing.

[Asker]

So after we’ve kissed we’re dating? Lol

[sheikalana]

I cannot guess that. You know your relationship with this guy better and that's something you both need to discuss. Often people are not on the same page and doesn't want the same thing that's why is best to clarify but if we're not dating I wouldn't expect this guys to take me to fancy places when we're just talking.

[osoli]

lol honestly even my friends take me on yacht parties, it depends on who you spend your time and energy on… if it doesn’t go with what u like change the people you surround yourself with… also if he wants to date you he should be trying to impress you in the beginning at least… so does a walk in the park impress or is it just like hanging out with a girlfriend for some gossip

[Shamalien]

Get a hobby