Guy I am dating won't let me post on social media. Who is in the wrong?

[Anonymous]

I have been dating this guy for 5 months. I recently posted a tiktok video of myself where I smiled in a flirty way in the video. He got extremely pissed at me and told me to delete it because he claims I am seeking validation and attention from other men and believes that I should only seek attention and validation from him. Am I in the wrong?

[fyrds]

You have the right to post what you want. He doesn't have the right to control what you do. Is he controlling in other ways (eg being grumpy and annoying when you're not doing what he want). At the end of the day, it's your body, your life. He's expressed a preference that you don't post on socials, but it's up to you whether you do what he asks - and you need to do what he asks because you want to, not because you're worried about his reaction if you don't.

Now, I appreciate that all relationships are a compromise, so if this doesn't bother you too much, and if he compromises with things you ask him to do, then it's probably not too bad. But you're definitely not in the wrong here.

[boggboss]

Not really a right or wrong here u are allowed to post said content the same way he can get annoyed at a partner for posting said content him demanding u take it down is a over reach but then equally if u know that's how he is by staying with him u would have to accept that as part of the boundaries of a relationship with him

[Thatpearl26]

Was that all you did in the video? I think if you have an agreement or a talk of some sort that you both agreed not to post anything then yes you’re in the wrong. But if there was no conversation and he is just being controlling than yes dump him.

[kylee2437]

Dump him asap. He’s going to progress to becoming more and more controlling and abusive over time. Allowing this to slide will just guarantee him to figure out you allow controlling behaviors in relationships

[richardcory]

He has no right to decide what you can and cannot post - that is controlling, and a really bad sign. He has the right to end the relationship if he is not happy, as do you - that is a right everyone has.

Nothing wrong with seeking validation from others - that is a pretty common human trait

[RHK36]

You're in the wrong for letting an insecure boy control you. If you like being controlled then 🤫. If you don't then leave why be dramatic about it and stick around.

Women and men stop settling for trash cans because you're afraid of being single.

[genericname85]

why would you upload flirty videos to attract male attention while you're actively dating a guy? you're signaling to him that you're continuing to look for other men and are not satisfied with him. so of course he's telling you to either stop or he'll leave...

he's doing the exact right thing. i commend the bro for having some self respect...

[HelpMe06]

Im sorry but I disagree. If a guy gets angry at a tik tok post just because his girlfriend looks good shows his insecure. He should not be allowed to have any kind of say on what his girlfriend is doing. If a guy thinks posting on socials is a signal for not being satisfied in a relationship then there’s clearly either massive low esteem, control issues, trust issues or just plain stupidity

[genericname85]

@HelpMe06 and if you fail to show basic decency and signaling your partner that you actually want them and nobody else, that's on you. you can not deflect that on men. why is it so hard for women to take any accountability for their own actions?
meanwhile all women lose their shit when their boyfriend has a tinder profile. double standarted much?

[HelpMe06]

Tinder is very different to posting a tik tok hahaha

[DextroShade]

You are in the wrong and he is absolutely right. The only reason anyone posts on there is for attention, and most of the attention you would be getting is from dudes. You have to decide if getting attention from random dudes online is more important to you than your man.

[Nikki1989]

Dump him. You deserve better than this insecure, controlling jerk. It will only get worse over time.

[Anonymous]

This is just the beginning. Eventually it will progress into him trying to stop you from leaving the house without him. You two may not be a good fit for each other.

[Drumlin2001]

You're both wrong. He shouldn't be controlling what you post, but you also shouldn't be posting material that is designed to attract others.

[jahaims]

The only reason to be posting content like that is for attention. You are seeking sexual attention from strangers. It makes sense that he wouldn't like that.

[mommymommymommy]

Never let a guy control you.

If he's got a jealousy issue, you need to confront him about that. If he gets defensive, it's time to move on

[Anonymous]

WHOA wtf... and you're just dating, doesn't mean you're official. big old red flag! no one should be able to tell you that, dating or not...

[LiamJHayden]

"won't let me"

That's the problem right there.

[In_Trance]

You are