Is it normal for crushes to last this long?

[Anonymous]

Had a crush on this guy for almost three years. Tried everything I could possibly do to forget him but can’t. I feel like I am going crazy.

Any advice on one sided love will be much appreciated.

[DizzyDesii]

I’ve had a crush on my childhood friend since 1st grade and no matter who I date, the crush has never gone away or just hides for a bit then comes back. If I was still around him, I’d talk it out with him. The closest I came to it was around 5th grade but my mom interfered then in 7th grade his sis interfered and exaggerated and freaked him out. We went to talk it out later in life but his helicopter mom pressured us to keep our distance and yea just a lot of crap happened. Plus his brother ended up liking me so I kind of just chose to stay away from both. So yea I’ve crushed on that guy for 20 years. The only other unresolved crush was my 6th grade friend. We actually made moves on eachother and he even took up for me a lot when his ex would bully me. But I wasn’t allowed to date yet and then our time together was interrupted when we were sent to different middle schools. So yep I liked him for 15+ years. I saw him some years back when we applied at the same job but we were being interviewed and didn't have time to catch up. *sigh* Its just something about those two. I’ll always consider them the ones that got away. I’ll like them until we finally come across eachother and find the time to talk about it. Everyone else I crushed on, I pretty much ended up dating or eventually disgusted with. So my advice to you, just make a move already or push them to the back of your mind and date someone else

[Asker]

This is really great advice. I guess it really does boil down to the fact that we just wonder what could have happened if we had spoken to them about it. Thank you for helping me understand my emotions better.

[DizzyDesii]

I almost made the bold move of putting a love letter in the first guys mailbox 😂 But i know how much his mom rules his life despite him being a year older than me, and yea she would’ve likely ripped it up. He and i were always at eachothers houses as kids and became friends because his younger sis was my friend and my mom had been all of their teacher at a point. His mom treated me as one of her kids until my mom told her that i liked her son. Then she became very overprotective although it was so innocent. Smh

[Jazzy54]

As someone who has had many one sided crushes, I’d say yes, three years is a long time to have a crush on someone. Who is he? How do you know him? I have so many questions.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

As for the heart it works in mysterious ways & when it comes to matters of the heart the heart wants what the heart wants & three years is a long time. In life if you never try you will never know & as for me when it comes to a relationships I rather try & fail rather than not try at all. You may feel like you are going crazy & sometimes love does that & sometimes it hurts. In life the only way to move is forward & forward is the way to go. It’s time to move on, it’s time to let go & if you don’t let go your going to deprive yourself of something or someone wonderful that awaits.

[NYCQuestions1976]

That is indeed a long time. Eventually it should fade. However everyone is different. I take it this is a guy who isn't available?

[Asker]

He is unavailable for reasons unknown to me. He’s not married and doesn’t have a girlfriend so it is confusing why he’s so closed off. He doesn’t seem to let anyone in whatsoever.

[NYCQuestions1976]

Someone closed off like that wouldn't be good for you in a relationship. You'd probably wind up getting burned by him.

[NYCQuestions1976]

Thanks for Most Helpful. 👍

[Anonymous]

You tell me. I have had the same crush on a girl since 2016, and it will not die. Despite harsh rejection, it persist. Therw have been points where the flame starts to seem to start to die out, than she will somehow add more fuel to said fire.

[bowenw]

There is no normal. It usually takes having a crush on someone new to get over a previous one.

[HusamRocks]

U need to fill some gaps in ur heart for ur feelings

[MementoMori777]

are you by any chance updating yourself eith this such said crush's life?

[Anonymous]

What is the level of your relationship experience?

[TallAnon]

Yeah, unless there's a trigger to disillusion you or you have a big life event happen

[Anonymous]

Crushes are for teenagers.

[Asker]

I would say it is more of an infatuation than a crush.

[KostasKouvalis]

I've had crushes that lasted even longer

[Guardian45]

Yes, find a NEW crush!

[Asker]

Never works. I have tried replacing, tried new relationships etc but nothing works. Nobody is him. It always goes back to him for some reason.

[shortster]

Find someone else

[red_knight]

Not normal

[Tstrbrainer]

I've had longer