Is sending a friend request on social media enough to encourage a guy to talk to me more?

Question

Is it up to him to message me after that and ask me to hang out, or should I message him? I smile and ask him questions about himself that shows him I pay attention to what he says, or what he's posted online, whenever we're around each other in person.

virtue2332 · Accepted Answer

Not really. If you are making an effort to be around and he isn't known for being a shy guy and he is not making time to concentrate with you more he's not into you or doesn't think you are a possibility. If he is shy and shown some interest you are going to have to be the aggressor. Once he is confident enough that he has the green light things will change.

DaveJord · Accepted Answer

You liked or followed him, so it on you if you want to talk more with him to message him.

I get likes on dating sites all the time... I like them back and message and they ghost or never response. I don't even waste my time anymore.

DannyUk2017 · Answer

Well is good to asses the situation from afar first and see where it leads to.

AmandaYVR · Answer

It's not "up to" men to do anything. Time's have changed. For various and valid reasons.

Sending a friend request is a vague signal, but too vague. It needs more. Follow up. Guys need clear communication. It's too risky for them nowadays to assume anything. They might get accused of 'stalking', etc etc. Although that's not a big deal online, they've been trained into submission. So help them out, and take the next step. Besides, all this pussyfooting around wastes a lot of time. Isn't it more fun to get on with it? If it doesn't work out, you move on. "Oh, well, no biggie."

couchweed92 · Answer

when a girl hits me with a friend request, i always try to hit them up and most of the time they say something like “just because i sent you a friend request, it doesn’t mean that i want to hookup with you” when all i said was yooo let’s kick it… so yeah we never know what it means forsure, you should definitely send him a message

blueonblack22 · Answer

Just add him as friends and see if he DMs your first

He just might not be that into you. But he also might be “playing it cool” and letting you pursue him.

It isn’t all about a power trip. At some point men figure out that women aren’t dumping when they are chasing. But he will eventually reach out if he’s interested. Just let him know the door is open

HawkPerception · Answer

That's literally putting in 1% and hoping they go 99%. I don't understand why girls are so afraid to make their intentions clear. Something as simple as "Hi. I added you because I think you're cute and I'd love to chat." Like even if the guy isn't interested or taken, a girl will most likely get more attention and be able to find another guy much more easily than he can find a girl. Just go for it and don't be afraid to be a little aggressive.

syncheart · Answer

What I'm about to say is probably not going to help you. Rather I want to express my frustration with social media, and the odd ideas people have about it. Related to your question: When I first started on social media, I thought that one should first make a friend and then add them to the friends list. Then I learned about social networking. The idea is that through friends of friends of friends you meet people and get things done. I tried both approaches and got nowhere with people. I even got criticized by people for adding people to my friends list. It is really frustrating to know how to be online. All I wanted to do is get a girlfriend. Before you say anything back, yes I have tried dating sites too. But I'm just saying that social media has been a huge let down for me. Even just for making friends, it has been a huge let down.

deus_ex_sisyphus · Answer

Maybe, but if the guy gets a friend request from many random people, there is a good chance your request won't be special/gets lost in the follower count.

sawno · Answer

It can be but don't count on it. I have plenty of experience in this regard and just learnt to test if she's actually interested by randomly not initiating a conversation anymore to give her the oppertunity to do so. If she messages on her own I know she is genuinely interested to either be my friend or more than that. While if she doesn't take the oppertunity I know she is merely going along.

Kokoaquest · Answer

Everyone wants something new to do everyone is online looking for it but outside IRL we rarely connect in unique ways. The creativity in relationships is waning... So many rules and not enough values that guide us.. So be creative with the conversation outside of social media.

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

Assuming you don't mind making the first moves:

Soon after he accepts your friend request, let him know casually that you appreciate the fact that he accepted your friend request.

If he continues the conversation, that's "impetus" enough to suggest a date.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

That's the equivalent of matching on a dating site. It's zero effort. It gets zero effort in return. Sorry, but if you can't say hello and a few more lines, I'm spending that time with someone who did. There's limited time in the day, after all.

MrPoppagorgio · Answer

Why not just be direct? Tell him and see what happens. If it doesn't work out you haven't lost anything and you can move on. I say go for it. If he likes you he certainly won't mind. Good Luck

NathanDavis · Answer

but... what if he received another twelve or twenty friend requests as well then, you would be just one more in the bulk... make a difference, don't leave it to chance, lol

JacobJordan · Answer

No. I am not a very talkative person I don't post anything on social media so friend requests are worthless I talk when I want to and I don't when I don't want to. Must guys will talk if they want and if they feel that they were not welcomed we pick that up real quick and stop

MiddleAgedClimbee · Answer

Usually face-to-face is better, but it does let him know that you are interested in talking with him

Anonymous · Answer

Sending a friend request can be a positive step, but it's also okay to take initiative and message him. Engaging in conversation, asking questions, and expressing interest can encourage him to talk more. Don't hesitate to take the lead in suggesting activities or hanging out – it's about finding a balance in communication and showing mutual interest.

Anonymous · Answer

A friend request is nice but it wouldn't potentially be enough for me to message them first. Leave some smart comments on his posts. Or DM if you're interested and tired of waiting.

All a friend request tells me is that you looked at my profile and don't find me offensive.

hotwheelz78 · Answer

SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE ON THE RITE TRACK... BIT DON'T FORGET THAT ON THE WHOLE... GUYS ARE STUPID...(DON'T TELL ANYONE LOLOL)... NO BUT THEY (WE) ARE.. ESPECIALLY AT THE YOUNGER AGES..(I'M 45 NOW)... AND THE DATING HAVE IS CHANGING SO FAST, SO MUCH, WE OFTENTIMES DON'T KNOW WHAT THE GIRL REALLY WANTS.. SO IF SHE CAN HELP US (EVEN A SMALL AMOUNT, US 21ST CENTURY MANLY MEN ARE MUCH OBLIGED...

desperatelyhungry · Answer

Absolutely not. You can be, in your mind, so extra flirty, and it will STILL go over a man’s head, let alone only sending him a friend request. I’ve sent old high school friends and bosses friend requests, it’s hardly a steamy move lol

mstbooblover · Answer

At least sending a friend request shows you have some interest for the person, and whether this is enough for him to answer may depend on many factors, but nothing prevents you from starting the conversation. What is there to loose?

Amiapowerlessman · Answer

It should be, especially if he was feeling shy around you maybe seeing the request will let him know it’s ok to talk with you more often

Marcodic · Answer

It's not important to me  which one of us  takes the initiative in that particular situation. That is, unless one or both of us are wanting to dominate and control the pace for developing our new friendship. I prefer to follow whatever direction my instincts guide me towards and allow things to work themselves out naturally, but comfortably for both of us, without giving much serious thought or concern to any preconceived social guidelines or standards set by others.

Holsen · Answer

Um yea it is, furthermore if he stil doesn't get the signs😮‍💨😮‍💨 guess you should text him as he may be shy or scared or maybe just not thinking much!!

overthinkergirl · Answer

sending a friend request, liking stories and posts are the bare minimum for me. if u like him u could ask him to hang out

WhitneySnow · Answer

That’s a really good question. He should’ve gotten the hint by now, but just in case if he doesn’t message you in like a week or so maybe you should take the initiative and message him.

Katebfun · Answer

You sound desperate. Back off and quit being in your masculine energy. A flower does not need to chase a bee. The bee just naturally comes to the Flower for its beauty.

fantasticass · Answer

No.., honestly I never accept friends request, even if I know them. Social media is a fickle place. If you want to meet someone, make the effort, don't be lazy using social media ✌️

modeunae · Answer

If you keep making an effort and his not reciprocating physically or over text/social media-- then ja. He doesn't like you.

whirled_up_girl · Answer

Just a friend request might not indicate that you want a personal message back. I would send a follow-up message.

molonski2 · Answer

I don't think just friending him is enough , after he accepts I think you should reach out and make the suggestion of a meeting.

thatshydork · Answer

In my experience, it depends on the guy. Some will take it as encouragement to talk to you, some won’t.

red324 · Answer

The only girls that friend request me are scammers from another country. Or they just want to sell you nudes. Which in my opinion is probably also a scam. Like they would really send them anyways.

RavVid · Answer

We have the problem of not being sure if you are just a friendly girl or a girl that is wanting us to give her sex.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

It's not... Guys don't take hints, and if he's already shy, you're going to make the first step more often.

Massageman · Answer

If you know of. an interest or two of his, you might ask a question about something along those lines. (Oh- you play the guitar? What is the hardest/easiset thing about playing it? ) etc.

summiter · Answer

Ity is a good start. It is also ok for a girl to take the initiative.. most guys like that!

Anonymous · Answer

I think it depends. If u guys already talk to each other, by following him can make him text u first.. or else, i think its unlikely to make any diff

Avicenna · Answer

I'd message him if that's what you really want (more contact). It's less ambiguous.

ItsBodieBrah · Answer

Maybe, but why wouldn’t you just be confident and dm him

Anonymous · Answer

if you want to talk to him or hang out with him, just let him know. playing the waiting game gets you nowhere.

Alex-Snow · Answer

I think it is a good start... but sometimes face to face is best also. Are u crushing on this guy?

Pohjolan · Answer

Depends on whether you know him from before or not. Men get both friend requests and messages from attractive "women" who are just bots or scammers.

Anonymous · Answer

You will get way further in life if you pursue what you want instead of passively waiting for it to come to you.

Jazzy54 · Answer

Not necessarily. What’s your current relationship with him?

DarkWinterNights · Answer

It’s very subjective per person and situational. Personally it wouldn’t be enough for me.

RealMarek · Answer

No, a friend request could mean anything or nothing, so most often doesn’t spur a reply.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

Yes, I would think so, it would be fine.

AydenHazor · Answer

That's a start, but after sending the friend request, once he accepts it, message him first to get the conversation started

RHK36 · Answer

Definitely not, just tell him you like him. For women it really be that easy.

CallmeTheKnight · Answer

No it isn’t. Send him a DM and actually have the intention on getting to know him.

litty736 · Answer

Been there done that. It never works. Well at least for me. However, everyone is different. You can try. You may be in luck if you do.

Shiva1312 · Answer

It depends on whether the guy is interested or not, if he is interested then he will talk to you, otherwise not. Mine opinion 🫡

LunarEclipse433 · Answer

If worded correctly I would say yes. If you show your intention to talk and they don’t reply I would just move on.

SunnyRS · Answer

If you want you can take the initiative as you might regret later if he is dumb enough like me to not read between the lines.

PeteLee2023 · Answer

I used to struggle with little things like that. But now if I like someone, I will tell her directly. Too much inner voice will only make you fall into endless distress.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

No, it's not enough. You have be be more clear and tell him directly what you want from him.

boobliker · Answer

not at all ask a question may get you talking

LiamJHayden · Answer

It might be, and is definitely better than not trying.

MackBoy · Answer

Wait till he replies to you and if he didn't reply to you that means he is not interested.

SUMAIREBRAHIM · Answer

No  I think sending friend request is friendly gesture that's it

Is sending a friend request on social media enough to encourage a guy to talk to me more?

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What Girls & Guys Said

Yes, I would think so, it would be fine.

Is sending a friend request on social media enough to encourage a guy to talk to me more?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Yes, I would think so, it would be fine.

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