What to do about his lackluster efforts?

[Anonymous]

There’s this guy and I fell in love with him because we were on the bus and he laid his head on my shoulder (after I said he could).

Anyway, I made numerous efforts to get in contact and go out with him again which happened twice in the past two months. There were times when we were supposed to meet up but he ended up joining other people or canceling and never responding back to me, even once not even letting me know he was even at the building.

He asked if I’m free this weekend and I’m completely over it now. I don’t want to subject myself to this. What should I do?

[HollyK21]

It sounds like you want to pursue something but does he? If I were you I’d want that part confirmed before I keep trying with someone. If that conversation has already been had and he said he also wants something, then look at his actions now. He’s very flaky, inconsistent and it looks like you will be in for doing all the work along with repeated disappointment. I wouldn’t want to settle for that if I were you. Mutual effort is so much better.

[Asker]

Thank you so much. He has flirted from time to time but you’re 100% right. Should I even respond to his message? I’m not even sure how to reply

[HollyK21]

No problem! Personally I would not, just because his actions wouldn’t be what I want from a boyfriend. Everyone has limits and after all that’s happened I’d feel like I’m chasing him or really pushing to create something when he isn’t even trying.

[bededazzle]

sure some self respect and move on

[Asker]

how should I reply?

[bededazzle]

it doesn’t matter as long as you are respecting your own values. but i guess you could say you’re not free

[ThrillSeeker01]

Just find someone better.