I do not like men. How do I make male friends to stop disliking men?

[Anonymous]

I’m a 18 year old senior in high school and I genuinely dislike near all men I am not related to. Boys my age are cruel to me and older men are dangerous and disgusting. I want to like men, so I want to make male friends to help me see the good in them.

My entire life other girls have had guy friends while when I tried they were only mean, when I assume it’s banter evacuee they keep speaking to me then they get mad, agressive, degrading, threatening, etc. I try to be nice and make jokes, they purposely take me seriously annd call me dumb and go on to say other cruel things Other times guys straight up ignore me. There are no rumors about me I don’t get it, I genuinely connor connect with guys my age and I truly believe they hate women.

I know it’s not because I’m ugly, I get stalked by adult men in public and catcalled 24/7 by men thinking saying sexual things at me is a compliment because they think i’m pretty or something. I don’t trust or like adult men who aren’t teachers or family for that reason.

I want male friends to not only help me stay safe from the men who harass and follow me when I go out but also to stop hating men. I never wanted to hate men, I hate them because they have consistory shown me they refute to treat me like a person or simply be nice. All I’ve ever wanted from a guy was for him to be nice to me, genuinely nice the way they treat other girls. I don’t know how to connect with guys enough to make friends though. How do I make male friends?

[guy_123]

I think what you are seeking is a boyfriend. So instead of approaching some guys that ridicule you, think about who's personality you like, who you think would treat you well and be compatible with someone feminine like you. Once you've found a potential partner (who will stand by you) try to approach them when they're not among their friends and get to know them. Show interest, etc.
Hopefully that way you can stay away from those mean guys and enjoy a healthy relationship.
It is not that you don't like men, you don't like idiot men which is apparently all you are surrounded by. Perhaps they are too dumb to "shine" in any other way and are just desperate to get attention, who knows and who cares... Follow your instinct and stay away from them. You will eventually find someone better than that.

[Keith469]

Dangerous and disgusting?

Do you think you might be prejudiced in some way?


My advice to you is to find some cause you believe in that is about principles and values that are important to you , and get involved. There's a good chance that you will find someike-minded men doing that too

[Asker]

Like I said in my post aside from teachers and family members adult men have consistently showed themselves to be unsafe to be around and often have ulterior motives. I would prefer to say justifiably cautious and suspicious opposed to prejudice as I’ve been preyed on by adult men since puberty which makes me wary. No one willingly plays russian roulette even if some of the bullets are blanks.

I do however agree with trying to meet like minded guys (my age) I still do not trust audit men or see a reason to engage with adult men as I’m still a high school girl even though i’m technically 18. I’ll try to talk to more guys in spaces where these stuff I like I usually just avoid them because I assume they’re mean so maybe one day I’ll start conversation if they seem nice.

[Keith469]

My point being that you paint with too broad a brush. You don't even know me, yet you called ME dangerous and disgusting.

That is prejudice, not overcaution.

[Asker]

rather paint broad than get raped, kidnapped, killed, or stalked by men twice my age

[Keith469]

You still don't get it: You've convinced yourself that ALL men of ANY age are dangerous. Older guys are creeps, younger ones are mean.

You will never meet a nice man (even for friends only) unless you can lay those prejudices aside.

I understand that you may have been exploited by your male elders and emptionally abused by your male peers. but if that is all you expect, that's all you'll ever attract.

I strongly suggest that you see a counselor.

[Asker]

Not even what i’m saying I’m fine getting over my thing with younger guys. Older men until I am an older woman I will always be cautious of because there is no reason not to. Young guys my age I could be missing out on relationships and good friends. I lose nothing from avoiding adult men until I am older I do not seek friendship or dating with men that much older than me. Whatever prejudices about them i can figure out later

[PonyCar]

Men have consistently shown you who they are. If they have no use for you, they want nothing to do with you. Why would you want to connect w/someone like that? That's like a chew toy trying to be friends w/a dog because they don't want dogs to chew on them.

[Anonymous]

You'll probably vent your male hatred on the male friends you make too, so maybe just leave men alone as a whole

[Asker]

No i’m still attracted to men that’s why I want to get over it. I want proof guys can be kind good people so I don’t have to do stuff like that or become bitter.

[slatyb]

What are you doing after high school? After high school you will be able to meet a lot of new people, and can find a group that shares some of your interests and behaves better.

[ChicoFromThe305]

Find guys you know you can get along with to some point and start from there

[Asker]

I don’t know how to do that though. I’m very feminine and girly and it’s like they just don’t get me and resort to thinking I’m dumb and being mean. I really want to meet a guy i actually think is a good person so maybe i’ll look in places where I know we’ll share interests.

[ChicoFromThe305]

Sounds like a good idea to start, maybe sharing the same interests might higher the chances of friending them, don't think too much of it either, don't forget to be yourself.

[Danny_dan92]

Yet you have male friends…




Seek help. Seriously

[Asker]

I don’t have male friends. I only trust my male family and teachers. If you read you’d see they treat me mean. I don’t hate men for fun I really just want a guy to be nice to me and none ever has

[Danny_dan92]

In the title of your question you put down you have male friends…

[Asker]

No I said how do i make male friends to stop hating men