Why does it always turn out the same?

[sunflower__]

When I talk to any guy on social media, they disappear after a while. Maybe it happens because of distance. I'm tired of this situation now😭😭😭

[Drew-1990]

That is hard honestly, I rarely talk to random girls on social media and every time I do I never get anything back. If he is popular he probably has options or doesn't like long distance. If he is less popular he is probably hesitant because of scammers and fakes. 99% of the time I get a random message on a social media by a girl it ends up being a fake account run of some kind. So if they get a lot of those they may be very cautious with you and you did something they deam as fake.

[sunflower__]

Ooh i understand what u mean. For example, the last guy i talk to knows i'm not a scammer😅 namely, he just read my message and he's not been active for almost 5 days. But also he often tells me "i don't feel good all the time".. I dunno maybe he has any problems.

[Drew-1990]

You may be right, or he is still hesitant about you being real. I would be extremely hesitant. I won't lie. I get so many fakes. I would kill for a real girl to randomly message me but I will be super hesitant at this point. Scammers have ruined talking to randoms on social media

[sunflower__]

I had sent him a lot of voice messages and talked about my life. We were talking beautifully but he's not been entering the app🤷‍♀️ honestly, i get a lot of scammers too. It's really annoying. I feel u

[Drew-1990]

Oh voice that would work so I'm not sure why he would leave.

[sunflower__]

Yeah it's interesting why he behaves like this. Maybe he does this on purpose? If he doesn't enter one week, should i text him "are u ok?"

[Drew-1990]

I'm not sure honestly some would be ok some would think it's clingy. I don't know the guy to tell you which it's about a 50/50 shot honestly. If you do and he ignores that I would just leave it alone he must not be interested.

[sunflower__]

Ooh that's right.. then i'll not text. I just will wait🙄 but honestly we've been knowing each other for one week

[Drew-1990]

Only one week then maybe just be patient and wait. I wish you luck. It's nice to know some people will take the chance and actually message someone

[OlderAndWiser]

Why do you continue to talk to guys who live a distance from you?

[sunflower__]

Cuz i lack social skills. I'm a shy person🥲 it's really hard to find a boyfriend in real life for me😭

[OlderAndWiser]

If you find a guy 1,000 miles away from you, that is easier ONLY if you never actually meet in person. Is that your desire? To simply carry on a relationship in which you never meet?

[sunflower__]

Who knows? Maybe he'll come to my country or i'll go to his country🥲

[OlderAndWiser]

If you want to meet someone in real life, the odds increase dramatically if you look for people who live close to you.

I have a theory that shy people sometimes seek log distance relationships because they have an internal conflict: part of them wants to be in a relationship and part of them wants to run away from the idea. By finding a LDR, you can tell yourself that you are in a relationship without facing the prospect of actually meeting and dealing with all of the anxiety associated with that. But, of course, LDRs rarely materialize into real long term relationships. They are just a form of temporary "pretend" relationships.

[katiesmuff]

Maybe put your phone in your back pocket and give a shot at finding a guy to talk to in person.

[sunflower__]

Ah unfortunately i lack social skills. I'm shy. It's hard to find a boyfriend in real life for me😭

[katiesmuff]

Then life is going to suck for you!

[Lynx122]

You're probably choosing guys that have a lot of options.

[Lynx122]

Or you're not good at talking to people.

[sunflower__]

Ooh in fact, i talk a lot.. i don't say anything rude. It's weird that they tell me nice words at first but then they disappear...🙄😒

[sunflower__]

I reckon i find perverted men😭

[Lynx122]

Nah I think they're just guys who have a lot of women who want them so they lose interest or don't put in effort.

[sunflower__]

😭😭 yeaah it seems so. They don't struggle... i dunno what to do. I feel tired😭

[Lynx122]

Try and find a man you like who isn't social media flashy but still has good qualities. Then you'll have a better chance because not every woman will be after him.

[spartan55]

It's because you are trying to communicate through social media... young people just don't get it.

[HollyK21]

If you’re tired then why do you do it?

[sunflower__]

Cuz i look for a bf😭 but i can't find it on social media and unfortunately i lack social skills. It's hard to find a boyfriend in real life for me

[HollyK21]

If your method of finding a boyfriend repeatedly doesn’t work, then you truly have to try something else. By trying to find a man IRL, you’d also be challenging yourself to develop your social skills.

[mayurr]

No. There can be many other reasons.

[sunflower__]

Like what?

[mayurr]

U r choosing that person who is already busy with multiple women. He have other options, maybe better

[sunflower__]

I also think so.😒 but how can i know that they've multiple women...

[mayurr]

Other= while communicating u just leave the chat or u don't ask him first. If I have to ask first everytime, it shows that the girl is not interested in me so I never message again.

[mayurr]

Its very difficult to know whether that person kept multiple options for him/her.

[mayurr]

It doesn't matter if u r talkative or not but u don't try to connect with him another way.

[sunflower__]

For example, the last guy i talk read my message but he's not been active on the app for several days. And now i don't wanna text "where are u? I wonder u" 🙄🙄

[mayurr]

If he is not active for that much time then u can ask but if he is active & not responding then it's a problem

[mayurr]

Similar to this, I was talking to a girl who was active everyday but replied only once a week & that means she was not interested. So I left the chat.

[sunflower__]

Ooh u re right but yeah he isn't active.. i see, if he was active and didn't reply, i would leave the chat too

[sunflower__]

However he often tells me "i don't feel good all the time.. smth happens to me every time"

[mayurr]

Maybe he have other problem

[sunflower__]

Perhaps.. he's not been active for almost 5 days.. if he doesn't enter one week, then should i text him? "Are u ok?" 🤔

[mayurr]

Yes.