Is it true that men don’t reject or ghost pretty women?

[Anonymous]

He seemed to put up with a lot before we met. After we met he kind of changed and he was less careful with his words, he said he wasn’t ready for a relationship.. but in the beginning he thought I may have wanted one. Then he ghosted for weeks after trying to message him for weeks and when he finally reaches out after explaining how his actions had hurt and messed with my mental that’s when he decided to be a decent human being and call to properly end things. Having a call was decent but I still I still felt really discarded. As if he knows he can find better.

[ZackBan]

A lot of men, especially men with little dating experience, tend to remove all personal boundaries when in pursuit of a partner.
They eventually wake up to realize they are unhappy because they compromised things that they once valued greatly. This leads to them tank the relationship as a self preservation mechanism.

Men with a bit more experience know that personal boundaries are a must have at all times. And those boundaries enable them to create a truly healthy bond with another person, one where both parties are satisfied to the fullest.

So don't worry too much about the ones you lost, they wouldn't have succeeded regardless.

[Flatmanlewis]

Absolutely perfect answer.

[liggang]

I rarely fall in love with the most beautiful girl. As much as I want a beautiful woman I think your average girl is pretty cute too. And that's truly all i need.

I just want to feel those feelings. The love and rhe anxiety and the fact that I can't get her out of my head. I don't know what causes those things what causes me to fall for a girl but it's not just because she looks good.

[noemiii]

No. A man who is not interested in you will not pursue you. While it may seem pretty women get more attention from a man who doesn’t want to pursue anything serious with them, it’s on the basis of sex.

He sounds like he is dealing with another woman, or didn’t like something about your personality. To take it personal, is to be insecure so F him and move on.

[Asker]

Like he has/had a girlfriend

[noemiii]

Or that he’s possibly just serious with some other woman. Men rarely entertain just one woman when they’re just dating around. That sounds like it’s the case, I wouldn’t take it personal.

[Asker]

That’s fine but men always knock me down for the woman they really want and it hurts… 2 men I talked to got married. I’m just not good enough

I’ve accepted it. I’m thinking about adult films anyway. Lust is so much better

[noemiii]

You didn’t clarify if you’re attractive or unattractive. Which are you?

[Asker]

Maybe a 5/6… I’m 5’10… 240…. Avg face… but with more effort 7/8

[noemiii]

Oh ok. Well going into the adult industry is not the answer hun. Try not being so male centered. Just focus on you and whoever is for you will come.

[Asker]

My ego is too bruised. Any guy who would actually want me I would be turned off by

[noemiii]

Maybe you need therapy girl. Seems like some underlying issue from childhood maybe with your parents.

[bobalife]

It doesn’t matter, people ghost for multiple reasons and an attractive person is no exception. Ghosting is not a great feeling, but it means he’s not your person and there’s somebody else out there for you :)

[Asker]

He probably had a girlfriend

[bobalife]

It can be anything, but try to not beat yourself up and move on. There’s still a lot of good looking and catches out there. You also only went on one date and don’t know him well.

[Asker]

It’s not so much about the date but the principle. His actions really hurt me. I just thought he had enough decency to end things properly. Especially since I felt like he was trying to make me feel emotionally safe in the beginning and asked me if I were emotional or even asked me what’s the safest way to interact with me

Then him kind of demeaning me by saying he’s scared to sleep with me because he’s scared I’ll be crazier or asking if my dad knows I post certain pics

[bobalife]

I’m sorry girl, it always doesn’t feel great when someone goes 180, I think you just found his true colors or poor behavior of trying to end things with bad excuses as if you’re the problem. Some guys does that shet to try to put on the girl as the problem when they’re guilty and don’t know how to end things properly. Tbh you dodged an immature douchebag. It hurts now, but you’ll be thankful later it didn’t work out cuz like you said you had hope he would have enough decency right? So who wants someone that can’t properly communicate and make up so mean shet. Im getting upset for you but it’s cuz so many girls go through this shet when they can pulled that ugly act of making up BS as if you’re the problem. Try to not let it get to you and just move on cuz he’s not worth the heart ache tbh. This is why dating to get to know someone truly is sooooo impt before investing emotionally and timely further on.

[Asker]

Thank you.. I keep telling myself that but after 6 months it still hurts… it’s like I’m waiting for him to come back around

I just don’t get why I deserved that… I’m not the woman he wants… he wants a top tier woman like a doctor or lawyer… I mean he has a degree in mechanical engineering so maybe he feels he can do better

I’m not going to put everything on him because I was kind of a mess in the beginning but I did set my boundaries..

But he did eventually give me closure after expressing my hurt and letting him know his actions affected my mental.. he apologized.. said he didn’t want to invest without eventually having sex, he said he has higher priorities to worry about and we can check in here and there

[bobalife]

I think you’re devaluing yourself for this dude’s value…. Never ever do that because everyone has their own appeals and good qualities. But I think you’re just feeling insecure with your own insecurities as he actually directly told you the truth is that he was not willingly to wait til marriage. Despite the bads, at least he came back to apologize and shared. I think you’re just wanting to let it go and accept that it’s over….

Don’t dwell on it too long and beat yourself up. You also deserve to be happy and meet someone else who’s willingly to respect your values and what you want.

And no, just cuz he’s a degree in engineering does NOT make him above you. Individuality is important. Not solely a degree. I have a bachelor degree but I don’t think of people less than me cuz of my educational background. I don’t see guys above me or any less cuz of it either. I focus on the person he is and how he treats me including how he treats others. I think you need to focus on treating yourself better, let yourself heal, and move forward from this situation.

[bobalife]

Not wanting to let it go*

[bobalife]

But overall this goes back to getting to know someone before investing further, you don’t really know him well and you guys aren’t compatible sexuality and marriage aspects unfortunately. There’s someone else who’s willingly to wait and respect it.

[Asker]

Thank you. I appreciate that. I’m working on my self esteem.. but part of me feels like @dreamLife7 is correct…. He would have made things work. He saw me in person and possibly didn’t think I was pretty… even if we weren’t “compatible” I still feel like a man who is attracted to you wouldn’t treat you that way. They only treat you mean when they find you to be ugly. Ik what that’s like… and I told him during the time he ghosted me that I was willing to get some work done and I should have waited until I got some work done.

He really showed me how he felt about me. I wasn’t good enough for him

[bobalife]

No girl, you’re just going back to your insecurity of not feeling pretty….. facts is many men will not be willingly to wait until marriage, don’t matter if she’s pretty or not. But there are a small percentage who’s willingly to wait.

Please work on loving yourself more. And why would you wanna hold onto someone who only wanna focus on external beauty alone than who you are and your values? I hope you take time to think about what you want and what you don’t want.
Best of luck 🌸

[Asker]

But he also said 10 minutes into the date that he wasn’t ready for a relationship…so I just don’t really understand… he asked me when I was last intimate… I’m not actually waiting until marriage but I’m actually a virgin with little dating experience and I didn’t want him to use me for sex

He never complimented me or tried to kiss.

I think it was early to even mention sex but why couldn’t he say “ I want to eventually have sex”….. like after I made that comment all he said was “so for your next guy….”

[bobalife]

Cuz guys aren’t always direct when they just want something casual but he pretty much hint it. He wasn’t looking for anything serious. No guy who wants a relationship talks about sex like that on a first date. I think you just need to eventually accept that you both were looking and want something different.

[Asker]

But I would have never agreed to go out with him… because I told him day one that I was willing to be his placeholder until he moved on. I told him I didn’t want sex etc and he’s the one who made it seem like I was more by asking “why would you want that” or “I thought you may have wanted something serious” ect… so that’s why I’m so hurt and confused… I told him I was willing to take things slow… he never disrespected me or mentioned sex ever… I even tricked him by asking if he wanted to do “fwb”… he said “why me?”…..

Then we did talk on the phone and he said “no offense but I think you come off a tad bit unstable “

But he called me full blown crazy on the date

[bobalife]

I think you just gotta accept that he’s genuinely not interested. You’re also in denial and fixated on this idea of him. Please heal and move on, there’s really nothing left between yalls. Your self-esteem seems low, I hope you’re able to work on your confidence and know your worth.

[bobalife]

And he’s also name calling you crazy, so that’s another red flag. It’s up to you to move on or be attach to this idea of this guy who doesn’t seem great.

[Asker]

What did I do so wrong? I cry every other day.. bc I feel so bad. I don’t understand

[Asker]

I e gone to the gym, I’ve kept myself busy, I e talked to other guys, I’ve talked it out in every forum you could imagine.. Im thinking about joining onlyfans. I was talking to a guy sexually and I even asked to do something wild. I wanted to give him oral and let him finish on my face.. I just want to feel something besides numb and depressed..

[bobalife]

Look you just need to understand that you need to stop self-blaming. I can’t tell you that enough cuz you don’t wanna believe it and you find validation in men than yourself which looks like is a lot of girls problem on this website with always asking on how they look and thirst traps. The most important thing is finding love within yourself instead of disrespecting yourself or go as far as only fans to get validation else where. Find healthy coping skills such as doing face masks, go out to talk to friends or family, journaling, taking walks; watching funny videos, etc. you’re too invested in finding love somewhere else when you need to find love within yourself. I’m sorry it has been tough on you, but beating yourself up will only make you miserable.

[bobalife]

And maybe just find peace for yourself than talking to some guy. Focus on you, your life, your happiness. It’s very unhealthy what you’re doing. Try seeking professional therapy to help you understand yourself, how to managed healthy coping skills; and build your self esteem

[Asker]

I see what you’re saying. But you’ll never truly understand why it hurts so bad and I don’t know how to further explain it.

I thank you so much for your time and wisdom. 🙏❤️😔

[bobalife]

You don’t know me lol. I’ve been through my own history of pain and heart breaks, but I don’t need to share my bad experiences publicly here and it’s no one’s business. The difference is that we grieve, mindset, and heal differently. I’m the type of person who rather stay strong and focus on moving forward than be fixated on someone who’s not worth it & hurted me even if I’m not over them. I rather work on loving myself than be co-dependent on someone else to do that for me. But you put your worth & validation by men…. And is too fixated on blaming yourself than seeing how he isn’t even good for you and how you’re better without him especially when he was never your boyfriend & say these mean remarks, but he was just someone you got to know for a period of time and went on one date. Not trying to say your feelings and time didn’t matter, but he doesn’t necessarily deserve this long period of attachment you have for him. You should give yourself that same energy and love instead. Hopefully someday you understand what I’m tryna say, please heal and move on properly.

[Asker]

Yes, I understand. I do have major issues with detachment. I’m used to guys hurting me, doing me wrong, saying hurtful things… and it hurt because I know there’s women out there they love and cherish and would never say those things to…. Why am I so different. Why am I so disposable but they aren’t…. 2 men I really wanted to be with got married and I swore they just weren’t ready but after we stopped talking they dated someone else and married them shortly after…

It’s not like I’m out here obsessing over every man but I don’t always want to be alone… I connect with guys I really like and see something with… it hurts because I know he’s capable of loving someone and treating them nice but not me

It’s all good tho. I think lust is better than love. I’d rather have lust than love. I’d rather do sex work. That’s all I’m worth at this point.

[bobalife]

Sending hugs 🩷 I’m really sorry that happened, I know it must’ve hurt a lot knowing they married someone else… it’s just part of life, they’re not your person and it also just means there’s someone else out there for you who can love you for you. No one truly wants to be alone, but what you can do about it is important is by growing from the experience and choose someone who’s going to choose you as well. You don’t have to resort to what you’re planning to do, but I can’t tell you what to do as it is your choice.

I wish you the best of luck and hopefully let yourself heal properly.

[Asker]

I appreciate it 🙏

He did say at the end “I hope you find someone who loves you the way you need to be loved “

I thought it was stupid to say.. how could I believe that will happen to me after you hurt me.

It’s whatever. I enjoy sex work. Never thought a rejection would turn me into a slut/whore… lol

Ty 🙏

[bobalife]

Unfortunately they’re saying they’re not the person for you is what that line means and that you deserve someone better.

I recommend reading the book, “love life” by Matthew Hussey, maybe it might bring abit enlightenment and healing.

[Asker]

I mean he lied to me about his real name so he probably had a girlfriend or something the whole time

[Asker]

I just think it’s very selfish or rude to tell someone especially after you hurt them

[Biancam13]

Not true at all. My friend who's a professional model gets rejected quite a bit, and by guys who aren't quite as conventionally attractive as she is, too.

She gets rejected because of personality incompatibilities with these guys. They just don't click on the level that is required for a relationship. So I know it does happen. Nothing wrong with her or the guys, just they aren't a match. The guys still try to sleep with her though.

Chin up! Rejection doesn't mean there's something wrong with you or that you aren't worthy or good enough. It just means that you're incompatible with the person rejecting you for whatever reason. It means that they aren't your person and that you need to keep looking. :)

[SphynxUK]

Men (and women) reject and ghost anyone, for any reason.
He did tell you he wasn’t ready for a relationship, meaning he didn’t want to continue. I guess it wasn’t clear enough for you, because he didn’t use the correct words. You’ve had that conversation now, so pick yourself up and start afresh. You weren’t right for him, but you will be for someone else, and you’re perfectly good enough in every way, so don’t let this weigh on your confidence.

[Asker]

Lmaooo I wasn’t good enough for him? Bet. I don’t really think I’m good enough for anyone tbh… they always find someone better, prettier or smarter. I’m a dumb piece of shit literally. I shouldn’t be too mad.

But to make myself feel better I’m going to suck a man so good and let him c** on my face. That’s when I’ll feel more valued or even valuable.

[SphynxUK]

My words were ‘not right for him’. Both parties have to have the same amount of interest and attraction. He wasn’t feeling it, and that’s no reflection on you, but whatever….

[Asker]

Same thing. Right it’s whatever. Thanks tho

[Malwi93]

why would u say u a dumb piece of sahit

[Asker]

Why not? I am

[Flatmanlewis]

This is not true. I left my ex-wife and she was, what most would consider, as very pretty. She modeled for a major company and I’ve seen her in magazines & fitness girl websites since then. I have not spoke to her in years and I guess you could call that ghosting.


Pretty is important for attraction but it won’t keep if there isn’t substance and quality beyond that.

[Anonymous]

That's not true. You also don't seem to be confident in yourself. You should be confident and not blame yourself. Everyone has different types. He probably didn't want to invest in someone who's waiting for marriage. And that's okay. Continue looking for someone who wants to wait for marriage. I am also waiting for marriage. There are a few men who is willing to wait for marriage, but they are out there. Just try to be more confident in yourself. It's okay to wait for marriage. I am doing it too. Good luck.

[Fireguy17]

at some point, no matter how pretty someone is, if her personality sucks then I'm gone.
It just is not worth putting up with, life is too short.
I would however be polite and let her know that it just will never work out and that I am moving on.

[Friendlybro79]

No one can really answer this with an answer that they can reply with evidence.

What I can say is that it's very probable even pretty girls get ghosted. Especially in today's young dating world from what I've observed. I work with young adults and I'm shocked at how things are in dating circles for 20-30 yr olds. Seems really childish to me but that's just my personal feeling. Things change I'm just trying to understand and be a good human lol

[HawkPerception]

I've stopped talking to a few attractive girls that had no conversational abilities or compatibility with me. But yes... it's much less likely a guy will reject a girl he finds attractive.

[Asker]

How to know if he didn’t find me attractive or the date just wasn’t good? He did ghost me after

[HawkPerception]

Was that your first time seeing him? How did you guys start talking? A dating app? Were your profile pictures accurate or are they old photos and you're bigger now?

[Asker]

Dating app yes… I feel like I do look different depending on my hairstyle but I don’t feel I look totally different. Maybe a bit… but I was dressed modest… my pics were suggestive

[HawkPerception]

He was obviously attracted enough to go out with you from your profile pictures and if you're saying you looked the same as in your pictures on the date, then I doubt it was a physical attraction issue, in which case the likely issue would be that he didn't vibe with you.

[Asker]

I admit that my eyebrows were too skinny and I didn’t have on the cutest outfit… I didn’t feel confident… but for him to ghost me and not care about how that would make me feel hurts…. Because we did talk prior and he even asked if I were “emotional/sensitive “..:.. he asked about my past relationships , he even asked me what’s the safest way to interact with me

[HawkPerception]

As much as he's in the wrong for ghosting you and the right thing to do is always to tell the other that they're no longer interested, you can't expect everyone especially in this generation of socially inept kids to abide by that kind of courtesy.

Just accept that he's not into you and move on to the next. There's plenty of fish in the sea.

[Asker]

I just think he already had someone.. for me to be discarded like that

[HawkPerception]

I don't think that's the case. But it could be he was seeing many girls at once and ended up not choosing you as the one he wanted to be with. And if that's the case it still comes down to he did not vibe with you the most

[Asker]

Oh okay…. ☹️

I just wish he was kinder…. But I should have just took the hint and moved on….

He was still a gentleman somewhat on the date… like he wanted to take me home or pay for my Lyft…

But he was texting another girl on the date.

[HawkPerception]

Because he offered to take you home and pay for your Lyft, you assume he's a gentleman? Let me guess... he also paid for the date itself. Otherwise you would not have been attracted to him in the first place.

[Asker]

Ig because I didn’t expect him to

[Asker]

But you’re right… I just wish he was kinder

I really wanted to be with him

[Asker]

I saw him staring at me but it wasn’t in a “loving way “ 😔

[Asker]

What about him not telling me his real name…? He used a fake name

[DreamLife7]

Yep, men are more likely to want the pretty woman to work out and have more tolerance for her. For an ugly woman their tolerance is extremely low. Also, you'll know you're ugly bc if u met him online abd he finally sees u in person then ghost u, yeah ur ugly. If she were pretty he'd follow up for a second date to make things work. Men a few more eager to impress a beautiful woman

[Pookie2626262]

Not necessarily both men and woman need more then just looks to get into a relationship scrolling down and seen you said y'all met on a dating website people have multiple options on dating websites it probably didn’t have anything to do with you

[DishLady]

No. Some girls are pretty but have no personality so they get boring to a guy… He might stick around a while longer for her looks, but ultimately he moves on. (Women do the same thing.)

[WhitneySnow]

Not necessarily but I think in your case he realized he was less attracted to you than he thought after he met you

[Asker]

How I looked?

I agree… I don’t think I looked as great on the date and I was quite quiet

[WhitneySnow]

Still shallow of him. And there’s nothing wrong with being quiet.

[BadApple69]

I could see that being true. Guys want that pretty lady to work out. They might be willing to take a little more crap from a pretty woman.

[ManInChains]

I reject/ghost pretty women as well as ugly women. I'm an equal opportunity rejector 🤣 I don't discriminate

[slatyb]

No, it's not. I rejected an extremely attractive woman because she was seriously OCD and it was intolerable.

[PreferNot2Say]

That's absolutely not true.
Haven't you ever heard the term "no matter how hot she is, there's a guy somewhere sick of her shit"?

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

A man that's used to getting pretty woman is just another pretty woman to him and will move on from her if there's something about her that's bothering him.

A man that isn't used to getting a pretty woman will not ghost a pretty woman.

[Radiate143]

Please go and your self worth. He ghosted you because he wanted to. If you had self worth, you wouldn't give a crap.

[Radiate143]

*find

[SotiCoto]

It happens... so no, that is false.
Also it is a stupid question. Why are the featured questions always stupid?

[Unit1]

Unless that man is homosexual or something or she has an OnlyFans or something

[Pohjolan]

They are less likely to depending on the scale. Like are we talking about a 7 or 9?

[Asker]

5/6… 7 on good days

[Pohjolan]

I won't lie to you about your chances but... you have my sympathies.

[moneymagnet24]

I do because I get bored easily I have many options

[Asker]

Maybe that’s why he did it so easily

[moneymagnet24]

Yes ma'am we have many options we don't entertain drama n headache

[Asker]

I wasn’t drama or a headache… but he’s 37

[moneymagnet24]

Sad to know 37 year oldie rejected you.

[Asker]

That’s pretty bad? Maybe he’s gay

[moneymagnet24]

Yes darling 😘
Maybe he just can't handle your hotness n feel insecure that he can't satisfied you on bed. No? 😘

[Asker]

Well I did mention waiting until marriage and in the end he said he didn’t want to invest his time if we weren’t going to eventually be intimate

[moneymagnet24]

Ah it's a deal breaker babe

[Asker]

I still feel like he could have just said that on the date instead of waiting weeks after … but I think if a guy really likes you he will wait

[moneymagnet24]

Yes ma'am definitely if he truly loves you then he should respect you. I agree with you ma'am.

[Asker]

But he also said he was scared to sleep with me because he felt I would be crazier. Or he even made a comment about how I dressed online and asked if my dad would approve

[moneymagnet24]

That I can only say if I see your pic.

[Asker]

I don’t have them anymore deleted them but they weren’t bad

[moneymagnet24]

You know you're so cute

[Asker]

Can you just tell me why he said that

[Asker]

Those 2 things

[Asker]

….. hello

[TonyMetal___86]

I can reject the sexiest or most beautiful girl in the world if i don't like her!

[VV3ZZY123]

If she's kind I would not reject or ghost. But if she's mean, then she rejects herself. Easy.

[justabuddy]

Nope... peoples physical appearance will change the longer you get to know them.

[trinket13]

people just ghost these days, people are super shitty

[mobiusforniner]

Nope. Done it many times

[laly520]

he was simply a bad person

thats it

[Nifrayu]

No. That's not true at all.

[hafinjun]

Well notuntil they get their dicks wet

[sheikalana]

Not true.

[war_daddy]

yes.

[Asker]

He thought I wasn’t attractive?

[war_daddy]

probably