Why do some men reject women they fancy?

Question

Is it because they believe that the woman doesn’t actually fancy them?

BullShark · Accepted Answer

Depends on what you mean by the term "fancy". Are they simply attracted to them physically? Do they connect on them mentally? Are they good friends with mild feelings of attraction? A lot of different factors can be the reason as to why certain men pull away or reject the women they may seem they're attracted to, but to keep things short, I'll just mention one;

Let's say a guy is interested in a female friend of his whom he's known for a long time. He finds her very attractive and they're very close. But she has a bunch of major red flags which he isn't all too sure about whether he's ready to accept or let slide. Like she's still caught up on her ex and hasn't fully moved on from him and sometimes says she misses him, yet she says she's ready for a new relationship. Or she's unreliable and lies frequently. Or maybe she's way too clingy and will lean on basically anyone whom she sees as a potential support system to her.

In all the above cases, any normal guy would pass her off.

ProbablyClueless · Accepted Answer

No, it's because they have decided the connection isn't worth the investment for whatever reason.

MrOracle · Answer

"Is it because they believe that the woman doesn’t actually fancy them?"

That's one possible reason. Here are some others.

He's only attracted to her sexually. And while you might think he would pursue her for casual sex, many men have stopped doing even that, because it's often not worth the hassle and destruction of his peace, because it's likely she's going to want more even if she agrees to just casual sex at the beginning, and then it's going to be a hassle.
He wants a relationship, and even though he finds her physically attractive, he doesn't see her has "relationship material." Maybe she has a high body count, maybe she has a kid, or maybe her morals and values just aren't in alignment with his. One way or another, she either has red flags or simply doesn't offer him anything of value (value as HE defines it, meaning her education, degrees, career, and income are likely irrelevant to him), especially if she has high expectations in return.
He knows her life goals are different (and conflicting) with his, so there's no point in getting involved in something that has no future. Maybe one wants marriage and kids, and the other doesn't. Maybe one wants a job that travels the world, and the other one wants someone who is home every night. Maybe one insists on a high lifestyle, and the other doesn't want to (or can't) make the sacrifices to deal with that.
Maybe he's got a friend who has already shown interest in the girl. "Bro-code" says that girl is hands-off until the friend has played out his hand with her, and the friend has abandoned any future with her, and usually has cleared the way for the first guy.

There are probably some others that I haven't listed here too. This is the reality that everyone faces: you cannot make or force someone else to want you, no matter how much you like them. All you CAN do is ensure that you have maximum value to offer them, so that you increase your odds of being attractive (and here I'm talking about in a relationship sense, not just sexual attraction) to more men. Even that won't assure you that any one specific man will desire you - there are always many things outside your control - but this can make a big difference in how many men DO find you attractive, and thus you are more likely to find a guy that you like as well.

Every bad or divisive decision you make is only going to reduce the amount of men you can attract, which reduces the chances of you finding someone who is (relationship) attracted to you that you also are attracted to.

The vast majority of men want fairly close to the same thing in the women they want for relationships (even though they will accept things way outside of this for casual sex). The further a woman strays from the things most men want in a relationship partner, the worse her odds become.

The big problem is that so many women confuse SEXUAL attention for RELATIONSHIP attention, but those are two completely different things. Men being SEXUALLY attracted to a woman is nothing special - virtually all women can get that, and it doesn't mean anything long-term. Men being RELATIONSHIP-attracted is much more special, and it's MUCH harder to achieve, yet most women seem to believe that if they've achieved sexual attraction, they've made it - and then they wonder why relationships don't work out for them.

Summeroflove · Answer

It really does depend on the situation there are some situations where someone panics and worries because being rejected is one thing people worry about upfront. But people also worry about long term rejection, being used, getting hurt, getting dumped, etc.

Another thing that happens is maybe at one point he fancied her but she waited until he moved on to finally make a move unfortunately that happens too.

Another thing that people do is make this fantasy in their head about how amazing someone is and perfect. Down to every detail until they meet the person for real… And they aren’t who they made them out to be and they loose interest.

It can be a combination of things or something else. Everyone is different at the end of the day if someone rejects you it’s best to move on and be glad you have closure. Trying to read into people to figure out why more times then not it’s nothing personal. It can be at times but more times then not it isn’t.

HawkPerception · Answer

I can't speak for all other men in the world, but if I was to reject a woman that I "fancy" (meaning I find her attractive both physically and personality wise), it would simply mean I don't have the confidence that I would meet her expectations and that she wouldn't stay with me long.

If it's just that I find the girl physically attractive, then I'd be open to getting to know her, but if her personality is shit, then I'd not pursue it any further.

And if a girl's personality is good, but I don't find her physically attractive, then I'd also reject her.

ohsheeT · Answer

Most men that reject women that they like them and they even know that the woman likes them is because they have no confidence

They're afraid of failure that they're not good enough for her

Or they're broke and they just don't want to embarrass themselves

And you would think that if they really really like them all they would have to do is go get a job and they would gain all the above to get that woman

stephanie-ramos · Answer

I had a massive crush on this guy and he rejected me twice. He went on to date this girl in our class and married her a few years later. Also years later I found out from one of his friends from school that he had big feelings for me as well even when he was dating her. She knew about it and them I understood why she never looked at me like she wanted to be friends with me.

He said to his friend back then: “if it wasn’t that I’m dating (name of the girl), we’d be together by now.”

He showed signs that he was only interested in me. And all that time I thought I was crazy and it was only a fantasy in my head because he wouldn’t want somebody like me (is what I thought those years). And then I found out he actually liked me a lot 🤡

Garud · Answer

It is like you like a very nice car but later you feel that this simple car is the best and most practical for me.
There is a doubt that though, I am very attracted to this person, she is not the right person for a long-term stable married life.

There can be many reasons for this, for example, some people like to see a woman in fashionable clothes but not after marriage.
Or the girl I am attracted to is engaging with too many men, not for me
Or they feel she is like a princess and cannot handle household chores
Or they want a career woman who shares financial responsibilities
Or she may not like me and even if she does, she may leave me
Or my simple girl is open and honest in telling me that she loves me, never played games, and I will stick to her as a loyal person and that is the only thing that matters to me and i will stop thinking about the girl i attracted too

SeriouslyNotSerious · Answer

I believe so, maybe.

A man before told me that he's afraid that I look like I'll break his heart, and I'm younger so other guys must like me and he never dared to talk to me again after that. Even after all of his massive efforts. I was about to say yes when he gave up.. 😪

FunkyMonkee · Answer

Could be various reasons.
Good from afar but far from good.
Nice to look at but not to listen to.
Her stances on any number of subjects.
Bad breath.
Bad hygiene.
No brains.
YD&FOC.
She's married, has a boyfriend or is pregnant.
Any number of other reasons.

Levin · Answer

I reject everybody, bro.

Joshua_H_1010011001 · Answer

It's your past or current actions and decisions.

Just because your shiney and I like your boobies dosent mean relationship.

It's a sign of maturity in a man. If he can objectively look at you as a person and not ignore all the problems / issues he sees, thats a great thing for the right girl.

Anonymous · Answer

I will be blunt, the way most guys look at girls these days is, 1. She probably doesn't like me that much, 2. She probably has multiple guys in her life, 3. It's better to reject before she rejects me or breaks up with me. Those are usually the common themes that runs through a guy's mind over a girl he may fancy but essentially thinking those things mentioned above to avoid getting hurt by her. I feel like when a girl breaks a guy's heart that he fancy's her, that feeling is worse than getting kicked in the balls.

mstbooblover · Answer

Do they? Silly stupid guys I daresay. If a woman I fancy is available, believe me I won't reject her !

tzdc21 · Answer

That can be a reason. Another reason could be that she has a bad attitude or unwanted habits that he's not on board with.

Truthatanycost · Answer

I find her extremely attractive, her past... not so much.

katiesmuff · Answer

Likely because they don't think they have a shot with her!

Anonymous · Answer

i wouldn't say that this happens a lot , perhaps guy got annoyed with girl or liked someone else. sometimes interest fads over time even with girls you were really into at one point

RavVid · Answer

It is quite possible to be highly attracted to a woman but know she is not good for you.

Unit1 · Answer

Man, what level of imbecile must a man be to reject a woman that he actually fancies?

SolitarySolace · Answer

Because women that men fancy the most will hurt him the most

Wiredone · Answer

Maybe he finds out they are not compatible enough for a long term relationship

Quigly · Answer

Personality issues, I might like the way someone looks. But, if I don't think I could live and get along with that person. All their good looks aren't going to help them. I can just admire from a distance

Maybe_Maybe_not · Answer

No context, can't answer, your question is way too generic and vague lol

CarolinaGirl5 · Answer

Men don't reject women they like. Sounds like u can't take rejection

CVNT5 · Answer

probably cuz the girl playing games and he serious. re-state//background_color_rgba (0, 0, 0, 0), font_color_rgb (77, 77, 77), justifyLeft

Anonymous · Answer

Men don't choose or reject women it is the other way around. So she didn't want him.

Anonymous · Answer

Do they? Or do girls think the guy is into them but he isn't? Or he's taken?

Anonymous · Answer

Because he feels like the age gap isn’t right

RedInnocent69 · Answer

We’ve got to prioritize. There’s not always enough cum for them all 😂

Anonymous · Answer

Too far away, bad personality, different pet priorities, different child priorities, and/or she wants to get paid for dating him.

thegreenyogi · Answer

I think it's called self preservation.

Anonymous · Answer

We are honest with ourselves, if we know you can do better, why try? That's a disservice to her, and a future letdown for me

Jennz6 · Answer

They don’t, they are playing hard to get

WowGIrl4ever · Answer

Too much pressure

kaucky1 · Answer

Not secure of their manhood

lorenzomichael · Answer

Cause they find out that they’re dirty hoes

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

I DON'T HAVE THAT LUXURY

ilkeerol28 · Answer

He literally says "hoop stop!"

scott04sa22 · Answer

No confidence

Jay-_- · Answer

They aren't ready.

Crazzyyworld · Answer

game players

Why do some men reject women they fancy?

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