Guys, Guys why did he get annoyed that I sent this song?

[Anonymous]

Just a question no bashing please.

8 year affair. separate bedroom marriage they only see each other 3 or 4 days a week and he's barely home.

The teenagers n wife wanted to see their friends and family in another state so he went. I got mad so

I sent the song Lips of an Angel by Hinder to him at 945 pm last night.

He got mad then he said it was more of him being annoyed I sent that.

Why is he mad? It's a love song.

So I said no reason to be mad at me over anything. Anything that annoys him is his own fault because he made the choices. He agreed.

But why would descending that sing get him annoyed. Maybe annoyed at himself!

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm that's a weird situation. I can maybe see why the song would annoy him though.

Even if it is just about missing someone, in his case it's probably reminding him of like the issues in his marriage and stuff. Like maybe he feels guilty deep down about the separate rooms and not being around much. So the lyrics hitting on that emotional longing is poking at stuff he'd rather not think about, ya know?

Guys tend to get annoyed or mad easier when we're feeling guilty or like we messed up somehow. Probably didn't like being reminded of relationship problems through a love song. Not that it's your fault!

Just a thought, next time maybe try having a serious talk with him instead of sending songs. Let him know how you're feeling in your own words. Music can get lost in translation sometimes. As long as you're both communicating honestly that's what really matters in the end. Hope things work out for you!

[Asker]

Ya that's what I think it is. He gets irritable when I bring up the reality of everything.
I don't think he feels guilty at all. He feels scared he might lose his reputation and be " the bad guy". And of course losing his money.
That's his worst attribute. He buries personal problems. I bring them right to the surface! LOL

[Oliverlogan263]

Aww man, that makes total sense. Dude definitely sounds like he's deep in denial if he doesn't even feel guilty about the whole setup. What a mess.

I can see why just hinting at the reality would get under his skin too. Calling out that elephant in the room is a threat to the lies he tells himself. Easier to stay mad at you than face how f*cked the situation really is, ya know?

But come on man, reputation and money over your girl's feelings? Weak sauce. Eventually that sh*t's gonna catch up to him when it all blows up in his face. Can't run from your problems forever.

Maybe you need to have it out, lay it all on the table so there's no confusion. Tell him straight he's gotta choose - you or all that other unnecessary bs keeping you apart. Don't let him weasel out of it neither. Make a stand, sis!

You deserve way better than being some dude's dirty little secret. His loss if he don't come correct. Plenty more fish and all that. Keep your head up, you got this!

[ManOnFire]

You got mad because he went to see people in another state, and then think he's wrong to be mad about you sending that song - which is still a good song by the way but that's not the point.

He could've been annoyed because he just didn't want to hear from you at that time while he's away. I really don't know. However, you are both terrible to still be having an affair for 8 years. Good God.

[Asker]

It's a great song but I think he hates facing facts how messed up his situation is. He has a tendency to bury his head in the sand
His wife knows he's been cheating for 3 years. So do his kids. But she doesn't confront him not even once.
So I take that as permission.

[Asker]

She screamed and threatened at ME a few times online but never him. Like go talk to your husband! Lol denial

[ManOnFire]

It's ultra common for wives to take out all their frustration and blame on the mistress. And that doesn't make it right, but they do it because yes they're in denial and deep down they don't want to be alone, so they turn a blind eye to their man cheating. I think it’s pretty messed up on all sides.

[Asker]

Well his teenagers daughters know too but they don't confront him either..
His wife MUST have had a conversation with them as to why they can't say anything to him.