Do guys hate it when girls talk about their feelings?

[Anonymous]

I’ve been talking to a guy for some time online and I feel like there’s something more although we never met and I asked him about it he didn’t give a clear answer and then he just completely ignored what I said and continued sending to me as if we didn’t have that conversation and each time I try to reopen the topic he tries to avoid it or something. I’m really confused about the whole situation and I can’t understand him so that’s just what I want

[Stef12]

It depends on the person. I don't just listen, I pick up remotely on how girls are feeling and tell them how I'd imagine they were feeling. I'm not well myself and met a girl who wasn't well in a support group on line. I didn't have to listen to how she felt, I didn't have to ask how she felt. I knew how she felt. I would write long messages detailing exactly how I felt that she felt. She was voice message me crying saying that she doesn't know how I know but it was like reading her own soul. She said she had never felt so understand. It wasn't general. She had a lot of past trauma and I was very specific on how she felt that way and why. Things she hadn't even realised herself. She would say how do you get it so right? Every time. Every single word. I fell deeply in love with her sending gifts and writing poems. She would say she's never met anyone like me. She was scared when I got better I would leave. We made plans to meet. She would comment sexy on my photos, compliment me, and flirt. She wanted to talk about sex. I always avoided it because I loved her deeply, was supporting her emotionally and didn't want to take advantage and be disrespectful by being sexual. I never came on to her because she was ill like me. And it just felt wrong like taking advantage. So I wrote her poems and sent gifts and showed love.
After flirting VERY heavily with me for a year and me avoiding it she got better and disappeared. I am now devasted by it. And have seen posts of her flirting with others.

So I listen, ask, and pick up very easily on girls feelings.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Not all the time but if it’s a constant thing w her than yes it gets overwhelming. And because it’s like every single thing w a lot of women seems to be like the end of the world. A girl I work w was reprimanded by management on Tuesday last week. It played on her emotions the whole week. One little thing can cause a woman to have a “bad day.” Most men look at these little things like seriously you’re crying over that. Another girl who comes in on day shift was upset the other day. I thought she was having issues at home. Turns out she was upset that some of the women on day shift were getting together on their off days to have lunch but she wasn’t included. Then two weeks ago we all ordered food, the one nurse wasn’t around, plus she said she brought her own food so we didn’t think to ask her if she wanted something. But at the same time it was just so busy that night that I don’t think we didn’t on purpose because I always ask regardless cause I know even if I bring food I still want something. But I think it was just so busy everyone just put in their orders and we had the medical assistant order it for us. Next thing you know this nurse is calling out the medical assistant for not even asking her if she wanted to order. That it was very unprofessional, etc, etc. This is just a handful of the stuff I deal w as a man at work. The other thing too is men weren’t raised like this, most men anyway. So when stuff like this happens most of the time we as men don’t know how to deal w it. Then we’re shamed for not having feelings, not comforting her, etc. We do have feelings, just don’t know how to really express them most times. Plus could you imagine if men were the same as women emotionally? I’m sure you’ve seen some women who were worse than others. Then when we express our feelings, they’re usually not the response women want so we get thrashed again. That’s why men usually just keep their mouth shut.

[DishLady]

Some guys are not comfortable dealing with feelings because they've never learned how to process even their own feelings and were trained to repress things to "be a man" (whatever that means).

Emotional repression can be either mild or severe and can affect both men and women. Some people never learn to let go of their repressed feelings, which results in ulcers, heart conditions, perpetual fatigue, aggression, and more.

[IslaTheWitch]

I don't think they hate it... they ignore it or feel lost...

[TommyMountainFigure]

It really depends.

If my wife wants to discuss how she feels then I'm perfectly fine listening to her, but if someone wants to discuss their feelings for ME or ask me if I have feelings for them, then yes, of course I find that unnerving because apart from friendship I cannot offer anything else!

Feelings for other people though? I'm fine with that!

[OfMiceandMen]

I think guys are fine talking about girls feelings, but some girls tend to draw-it-out rather than get to what's bugging them.

Some come back to the same thing all the time, when the guy's thinking... I thought we discussed this and came to a conclusion already.

I know most guys would roll their eyes after about 30 minutes of discussing something. We naturally have a shorter attention span and talking about our feelings rather than just conveying how we feel through touch, smile and laughing.

It doesn't have to be an entire day event. I think if it can be expressed/conveyed well and within a relatively short time frame, then it can be out in the open for discussion and it doesn't have to take an entire afternoon.

[V_Injector]

It's not that we hate it, but a lot of us are not made for it. It's easier to overload us with it and we basically start data dumping it. Especially if it's stuff we don't have a solution to or can just fix for you, so you'll shut up about it.

Some guys can handle a lot more of it and they use it as a sexual strategy... I call them emotional tampons. A lot of people just call them SIMP's.

But it sounds like he's already banging you, and he might not be a SIMP. So I'm gonna say you're just overloading him with emotional garbage.

[ohsheeT]

I'm an empath and I can feel people's energy and emotion and that tells me so many things without a girl having to say a word. When I make love I like to look into her eyes read the color of her cheeks the way she breathes moans moves because it tells me something without her saying one word. Yes when I'm with somebody I want her to communicate I need to understand her even though I know right from wrong but there are some things that needs to be communicated about if you want change or if you want to fix something so yeah I'd like hearing what a girl feels or what she thinks even I love smart girls intelligent girls wise girls and girls that feel things deeply because that's what life's all about becoming one with the other

[FarAway12]

I was interested in this one guy and in his words "I never talked much" but he always appreciated when I shared my thoughts on matters. I'm VERY blunt so I would ask certain questions burning in the back of my mind or say what was on my mind. I saw no sense in beating around the bush or keeping my thoughts/feelings from him. I shouldn't have to be miserable because I'm too afraid to speak up. I don't like confrontation, but some things he said or did required some confrontation lol. But that's just one guy.

[WodensGedriht]

It's only bad because of how one sided it is. Women pretend like they want to hear your emotions too but it is a trap. As soon as men start expressing their troubles to a woman, her perception of his value goes down.

If women can address this issue, I think half of the MGTOW problems would go away. A lot of the shite men have to go through in the dating scene, hits women too at a later point.

Honestly I don't think it's as messed up in Britain cause men and women care less about each others status due to our unfortunate socialist economy.

If I went out and joined a gang, that'd probably raise my desirability (to both friends and girlfriends) more then how much money I can wave about. I see lots of complete losers getting with both good men & women. Not really like it is in America where status means everything.

[Anonymous]

No. Men just like it when she keeps it in a logical format.

Guys are natural problem solvers. When a woman come to us it's in our natural inclination to want to solve her problems. But sometimes women don't want an answer. They don't want a problem solved for her. They just want the guy to feel with them. To hear what she says and react emotionally with her And this goes against a guys programming. Guys that are experienced with women learn how mimic what she wants but it never really adds up to a guy. He just learns to do it.

Don't be confused. I'm not saying Guys don't feel or can't feel. They absolutely can and do. But the thought process of men and women is vastly different.

[sawno]

They do when they don't know how to handle it, my close friends I help if they need some emotional support so I'm used to it and don't mind it if its every now and then. Of course if it would be constant drama dumping to where it wouldn't be in balance i'd eventually get annoyed and want it to stop. But typically its all in good balance where they can rely upon me, I can rely upon them and we also spend time doing other things.

[RageBabe]

Some do, and those are typically the ones I avoid.

[Purpleronnie]

I wouldn’t be sharing feelings with a girl i’d never met …. Period.

[Anonymous]

Most men crave clarity. Woman are very rarely blunt and clear like men. They hint and imply. Feelings are the grey area if not handled properly.

[Opinion Owner]

If men avoid a topic they probably already gave you their response and will not feel like repeating it. It makes them feel like you weren't listening.

[Nikki1989]

Read the BS posted here by males and you will have your answer. Most don't want to know.

[WodensGedriht]

Well are you using the standard my ex used, where I had to listen to her being critical of me all the time and if I didn't, I didn't care about her feelings.
But she'd freak the fuck out over my feelings cause I'm also critical and my violent urges (none towards her & entirely expressive) would give her a PTSD episode reminding her of her evil father.

[paledreams]

If they're calm and cool lol 🤣😆 no one likes drama or overly heavy emotions people : like I find it awkward then and very overwhelming

[BoopBoopBeep]

No, but we do hate having the same conversation over and over again.

[ProbablyClueless]

No, it doesn't bother me at all. The only thing I don't like is when the conversation just go in circles.

[Vegasrunner]

That's smart. He understand that his value to you in this relationship dynamic is as an emotional tampon. Once he engages you in this matter all attraction will be lost.

[andreasderjuengere]

Only when it takes more than 5 minutes.
Be time efficient, please.

[clampfan101]

Not me. I’m much more of a listener than a talker, I’m very open minded, and I don’t even mind if they need a healthy vent now and then.

[serious_miss419]

There are guys that are capable of responding more mature than this fellow has.
He sounds exhausting. I’d move on

[LiamJHayden]

No, as long as she does not mind my pointing out whenever those feelings are irrational.

[andy530]

No not necessarily. We hate it when we are not sure what the girl wants when talking about her feelings (validation, reframing, solutions, etc)

[OhLongJohnsoning]

We don't hate it, but, if you draw it out, we do. Like, tell us how you feel, and then leave it alone

[noohair]

You are in the illusion that you know this guy. Texting is like email. Until you meet and pass the smell test, you are living in dreamland.

[Caps_d_ed]

Actually, quite the opposite. I respect a girl who can open up about her feelings.

[Starrrboy]

Well, obviously if she means something to you, you won't hate it!.

[Tomisworthless]

I don't know noones ever poured their heart out to me

[WhitneySnow]

Some guys hate it

[exitseven]

No it is a good way to get to know someone

[Dongie]

Nah, it's their thing.

[In_Trance]

Depends what the feelings are

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

I don't but better not be in a whining way.

[smurfwrangler]

not really no. it's normal

[jahaims]

Depends on the guy.