Ghosted… after meeting the parents and everything?

[Anonymous]

So I met this guy on bumble, we went out for three months. He said he was planning on asking me to be his girlfriend when the time was right. I always enjoyed my time with him, but he seemed to get more and more distant. I met his mom and communication started to decrease. I felt like I was the only one putting in effort. He had two broken hips and I came and brought him gifts after his surgery, I told him to call me if he needed anything. I drove an hour and a half round trip so totaling three hours to go see him multiple times while he was recovering. He talked about brining me home etc…. Finally one day I went over he wouldn’t even touch me or anything, wouldn’t even talk. I went out of my way that night to buy him gelato, dinner and snacks. Then afterwards he just completely ghosted me, no response. For a week, finally I reached out and said I was confused. He said he didn’t want to hurt me, that he planned to move away, didn’t want to lead me on and he wasn’t ready for a relationship etc. this really hurt since we had just had a conversation that he wouldn’t be moving or anything. I felt lied to, used, and he promised he would never ghost me. He continues to follow me on Instagram and views all my Snapchat stories. He said maybe I’ll regret this later and I’m being stupid when he wrote me his goodbye. Which is odd because why would you say you'll regret it later. Why did he ghost but continue to follow me?

[Oliverlogan263]

Yikes dude, that totally blows. What a jerk for leading you on like that only to ghost.

Seems like maybe he wasn't as ready for something serious as he claimed. Could be he started catching real feelings and got scared. Then instead of being honest, he dipped like a coward.

I wouldn't think too much on why he still follows - social media stalking exes is super common. Probably just wants to see what he's missing.

As for his goodbye message, who knows what was going through his head. Maybe he already did start to regret it but was too proud to admit. Or just trying to spare your feelings in a lame way.

Either way, nothing you can do now but move on. You definitely deserve someone stable who won't flake. Keep your chin up - plenty more fish and all that. Don't let this dude live rent-free in your head. He's not worth the stress!

[_Maya_]

He probably wants to continue to follow because you did mean something to him at one point and probably still do. I think what happened is the reality of him having to move away really hit and sunk in. It sounds like he was having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that the relationship was not going to last and that he is not good at dealing with tough subjects. Having to tell someone you have feelings for and got close to that it is over is super hard to do. I don't know if you have ever faced that but even when things are not good it is still hard to break up. I think he was just delaying what he knew he had to do as much as possible. That doesn't mean he still doesn't want to follow and know how you are doing.

[DrPepper12]

Just be happy you dodged that bullet. Go have some rebound NSA sex. You'll feel better!