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From a male POV, you are basically a talking cake in a cake shop window, asking why people are staring. If you don't want to be stared at you know you can dress like a nun in the winter time. Of course feminists don't like this answer because it suggests that how you get treated in life might sometimes be related to how you behave yourself. They would claim that any suggestion women can control their own actions is promoting rape/violence/toxic masculinity. But the thing is... guys are required to be responsible for their actions like 99% of the time. Don't tell Santa how to make toys. He tells you how to make toys.
Anyhow, you can ignore guys staring. Just like some of us guys choose to ignore women wearing clothing that's too tight/short, and pretending to need help with stuff just to get male attention. But not all guys have mastered the art of ignoring.
Oh no I wear wide shirts. I don't try to look pretty as long as it is comfortabel. That's why I asked,
Let's say a guy couldn't see your body at all.. he can still see your face which he might find attractive so he would still look. You women who dress to avoid attention are being silly in my opinion. But the other extreme of women who dress like street hookers is over the top too. The old classic looks were fine. But I get it, you have your style.
Ohh no I try to hide the size of my boobs. Even though you still see it with wide shirts.
I'd rather wear wide shirts than get the wrong attention
or how about u js dont stare? u won't see as many women stare down on men like that.
Asking men not to stare is like asking birds not to fly. It's irresistible natural normal behavior that is unavoidable. It comes from the same place as the instinct that is the reason the human race survived today and we are here to talk about it.
Omg I wear long skirts if I don’t want the looks that day too !
I cannot speak for all men, but for me, staring is not a irresistible behavior
I don't like the talking cake in cake shop analogy. Speak for yourself... That implies we see women as an object, less-than human. We are the human/customer and they are accessory/food for us.
I also have a problem with some guys using the 'ask a fisherman not the fish' analogy. Anyways, my point is, be careful making generalizations about the male population based on a small sample size of GAG users.
There's a variety of guys out there...
@I_am_a_human "that implies we see women as an object, less-than human". Oh, you thought that when someone sees you or a woman without any interaction at all, they find your personality attractive? You sound like a chick who is lying to herself. Why is that? Personally, I was never even into women who I didn't find had a good personality. But "into" is a higher bar than "found attractive looking". Different things. And yeah, the reality is that lots of people get objectified in life, men & women.
@Kayleigh2005 You're smart & honest. That's good. Of course you can never know what a guy will find attractive but... you at least try to have some control over things.
I’d never stare unless I was trying to get a woman’s attention and only in particular scenarios. So in that sense , why would I be embarrassed? What do I have to be embarrassed about? My point could be to be ‘caught’ so that I could advance to approaching and then talking and so on.
In what kind of particular situations? Oh, so you do that to get caught?
There have been quite a few situations when I have felt it appropriate to stare , from those that are confrontational to those where I have wanted eye contact. Women employ this behavior too and also don’t feel embarrassed about it. Making sustained eye contact has also let me know if the woman wanted to be approached. Eyes and body language can speak volumes so why would I feel embarrassed using them?
I understand that some women do that too, but I don’t. What is it about prolonged eye contact? There was this guy who suddenly did that while I was actually talking to someone else. I don't like the long stares so I looked away and just said hi awkwardly to him but he kept staring
Yeh agreed , in your example that sounds especially creepy , Ted Bundy at least was charming 😂 jk. If the starer isn’t gonna apply his tactics properly and pay attention to social cue’s then I stand beside you in your view but it’s like everything in that space even the right behaviors from an unwanted person can be creepy and we have to be mindful in how we communicate that. Simply saying staring is creepy af , is net helpful and also isn’t always true.
I totally agree with you!!! That's so true. But yeah I mostly ignore it. Only it seemed like he wanted to talk or is kinda interested. And yet I can't figure him out tho. Thank you by the way for your time!!!
You are most welcome, my pleasure. Woman by far have the rough end of the stick here so thank you for being so open minded. Pity your hiding your identity, it would have been nice to take particular interest in any other questions you have. Maybe in time you may reveal yourself 😝
Well that's because I ask kinda the same question but it's all about different men over the years; I mean when I just meet them but nothing happens.
I don't get men 😫 I don't get flirting so I am trying to understand men who want something romantic, to react in a better way.
I was always the nerd so I just learned about all this.
Well to some extent I understand, if you feel you have never gotten a satisfactory answer or the parameters of the question change then you got to keep searching. However there is really no right answer just a million variables and nuances that can change in a heartbeat affecting the outcome. If it’s any consolation I am also a geek , and I have never claimed to understand any woman or the typical behavior of any man as much as anyone could generalize that. Flirting can also seem like a dark art and nobody starts off in any way naturally good at it in my opinion. Happy to lend my thoughts anytime though , for what it’s worth
Oh no that's not it. It's more that every person reacts differently. Sometimes it is easy to know that it is just attraction or just lust.
But sometimes I don't get it and need someone to figure out so I can be polite to someone about it.
Because I don't want to be rude and get it wrong.
Most people don't act nice when I don't understand them, that's why I ask it here !
Opinion
30Opinion
Most women enjoy being looked at, even if some of them pretend not to. We both know that plenty of women purposely dress to maximize the display of their assets. Not saying that ALL women do, but plenty do. If I look, I'm not shy about it, and I don't apologize or get embarrassed for doing so.
If you're a physically attractive young woman, you ARE going to be looked at, even if you are dressing in a burlap sack. That's just the reality. It's not like women are any better - have you seen women go crazy over a hot guy or a celebrity? I have, and they're WAY worse than any man is.
You can adjust your clothes to minimize the attention that you will draw, and you will get less attention, but it will never be zero. It will decrease as you age, and you will probably miss it when it's gone, but maybe you won't.
Like everything in life, it's a double-edge sword. There are advantages to beauty, and there are disadvantages. You can either choose to embrace the advantages and use them in your favor, and ignore the disadvantages (even if it takes some effort to do so), OR you can waste the advantages and dwell on the disadvantages. The first way leads to far more success in life than the latter, but it's still your choice to make.
It is a fundamental right... if it is on display then we can window shop. I think it is wimpy to try to disguise you are having a look and the manly thing to do is to be forthright and blatant.
Congrats on being good at display by the way. We mostly only look at the best quality.
I always cover it up and wear loose shirts. I don't show cleavage.
Men don't have such ego that it can break if caught, they are humble and honest
that's why men don't play games and act hard to get
the main reason the men do so, nature made them this way
men slowly learn to control this
Because i want you, and i want you to know that i want you
Omg really? Is that what they are thinking?
I try not to stare at anyone in an obvious way because I don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. I may find them nice to look at but they may not feel the same way toward me. I don't want to make someone feel unsafe or feel like a piece of meat.
If I was caught staring and it was clear she looked uncomfortable, I'd stop staring. I don't want to bother her more.
Well, it's obvious! You are so beautiful that you are 'Simply Irresistible" They just can't help themselves and are drooling and messing their shorts looking at you!
Is that the kind on condescending answer you wanted?
Most men have no filter when it comes to perving. They will perv at anyone.
Unless someone reports a study, it's probably safer to assume "most X..." means "most of the X I have personally observed..." than "most X..." at face value
I don't think I was clear. She may actually think that most men are pervs. I am just saying don't trust her statement if she hasn't provided a study. She may think they way she does because of her experience. Neither she or us can meet most guys in the world. Don't waste your breath on someone who may be biased.
I feel like you may be triggered by her statement, don't take it too personally. Maybe, she can respond to your comment and explain her reasoning...
@I_am_a_human I didn't trust her statement, which is why I asked, 'Most?'
Also, I'm not triggered by what she said, but I do get irritated when people make claims they can't back up. I believe that people should learn to express their ideas and information clearly and responsibly, rather than being careless.
Why should we be embarrassed for staring at something nice that we like to look at? When I visited the Louvre in Paris, I stared at the Mona Lisa, and so did everyone else.
u We are hunters. That is what we do. We don't claim the prize by being bashful! But some guys have an internal conflict about this degree of assertiveness, and they sometimes become embarrassed.
Men love with their eyes. Women love with their ears. Cat ears.
AI girlfriends love with both.
Because I dressed to get attention they better look , I actually wear long skirts if I don’t want attention 😂
Long skirts look beautiful
No not really because if I'm looking it's because I either see something I like with the person on the person about the person and I'm curious
If a woman comments on it, namely if she says something like "eyes up here" he is
https://www.youtube.com/embed/ty4PhRWt1hU
I only get embarrassed if she calls me out, but if she's into it, why would I be ashamed. Especially if she initiates first, I make it so obvious that I noticed and that I'm also looking
It's not exactly a risky thing for us. If you catch us staring, we just move on with our day.
Call them on it and they are. I'm not rude I'm just loud and cheeky. Blush every time.
Most of the guys I’ve caught staring do look embarrassed
Sometimes women imagine that a man is staring at them. They maybe looking in your direction but be mentally elsewhere
It's such a strange thing.
I have eyes as a human. I will use them how I see fit
if a guy showed those signs to a woman she would perceive him as weak, scared, inferior to her and therefore unworthy of respect
We are. But at the same time, it’s natural. Girls want attention, but only from certain guys. It doesn’t work like that.
I am when I get caught. I usually don't know how to act.
I only stare if there is something far out of the ordinary.
Uhm, why should they be embarrassed? I wish more women would stare at me.
It's EVERY boy's birthright to look down a buxom girl's shirt !!!
I don’t care if she sees me or not looking. Women are just as shallow as men when it comes to looks.
Because we know women stare too.
What if she isn't interested?
The one being stared at or the female friend/girlfriend/wife?
I mean I get that women stare too. That's true. But what if the woman isn't interested but he keeps staring whenever they meet each other. Isn't he embarrassed?
If he keeps staring after being rejected, then he needs to stop. Consent is important and she already proclaimed how she feels about it
I agree!!! Thank you for being so nice and taking your time to answer
Lmao, there is no reason to be ashamed of appreciating beauty.
I just give them a nod.
What do you mean?
Men have no shame
They shouldn't be. Perhaps that's why.
Because it's no big deal.
these men remind me why ill never date.
There’s nothing to be embarrassed about.
We’ve had this conversation before apple. Looking and creeping are not the same thing. People can think whatever they want about anything. Doesn’t affect me one bit
@Apple1996 lol consent? Nah. My eyes can look wherever I want 😊
@Apple1996 touching requires consent. Don’t get it twisted
Why would they be embarrassed?
Bc its natural
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