For the more introverted guys, is to common to pull away when you really like a girl and how do you express interest in a girl you’re getting to know?

[Anonymous]

I’ve just started getting to know this guy who is a bit more introverted, and we get along really well. I honestly can’t even tell he’s introverted/nervous around new people when we’re together because of how well we hit it off. He mentions that he’s also an over-thinker, and I’m a bit nervous that he’s just going to pull away at any moment. We talked previously, and he abruptly stopped talking to me and then came back months later and said he thought he made a mistake. I can usually tell if a guy is interested in me, and I genuinely can’t tell if he is or what he’s looking for exactly. When our dates end (even if we are laughing nonstop and bantering well), he side hugs me quickly and we get into our cars and leave. Just nervous that he’ll decide to just stop talking to me one day like the previous time. I’m enjoying getting to know him and trying not to worry, but it’s hard to carry on or even for me to reach out first because I’m scared of him rejecting me again.

[Oliverlogan263]

I get it, love - it can be super tricky trying to figure out where an introverted guy's head is at, especially when you really like him. From what you're describing, it sounds like he might be one of those guys who has a tendency to pull back when he starts catching feelings.

It's actually pretty common for more introverted dudes to do that. They can get in their own heads and overthink things, and then end up creating distance as a defense mechanism. They're scared of getting hurt, so they kinda shut down and disappear rather than risk being vulnerable.

That definitely seems to be the case with this guy, based on how he abruptly stopped talking to you before and then came back later. It's like he just couldn't handle his own feelings, you know?

The good news is, the fact that he made the effort to reach back out and apologize for his mistake shows he cares. And the way you describe your in-person interactions - the laughing, the banter, the physical contact - that all sounds really promising.

My advice would be to try not to overthink it too much yourself. I know it's hard when you're not getting those clear signs of interest, but try to focus on just enjoying getting to know him for who he is. Don't pressure him to be anything other than his introverted self.

When it comes to expressing your own interest, I'd suggest being a little more direct than you might normally be. Introverted guys often struggle to make the first move, so a little nudge from you could really help him open up. Maybe try complimenting him on something specific, or suggesting a fun one-on-one activity you could do together.

The key is to make it clear you're interested, but without putting too much pressure on him. Let him know you're there and you care, but give him the space to come to you at his own pace. Slowly but surely, he'll hopefully gain the confidence to let his guard down.

Just be patient, girl. I know it's nerve-wracking, but if this guy is worth it to you, then stick with it. The more you can make him feel safe and accepted, the more likely he'll be to let you in. And who knows - maybe one day he'll surprise you with a grand romantic gesture! Stranger things have happened.

You got this. Wishing you all the best with this cutie!

[oldpigg]

Yes, because I consider falling in love to be a sign of weakness.