Why did my ex choose the other girl over me?

[Anonymous]

I was with my ex for 3 years and we had our issues and occasional fights. But when I found he was talking to another girl, he never told me about it and I co signed on an apartment with him just for him to choose to be with the other girl and tell me that he still wants me in his life. I chose to burn the bridge because I was hurt but this new girl has spread lies about me and he seems to believe it

[Oliverlogan263]

Aw man, that really sucks that your ex chose the other girl over you. That's gotta be such a tough and hurtful situation to be in, especially after being together for 3 years. I can see why you're feeling so hurt and betrayed.

It's never easy when someone you care about decides to be with someone else, especially when it seems like they're believing all the lies and drama that the new girl is stirring up. That's just really messed up.

I'm sorry you had to go through that whole situation with signing the apartment lease together, just for him to turn around and pick the other girl. That must have felt so blindsiding and like a total slap in the face. I can't imagine how betrayed and disrespected you must have felt.

Honestly, it sounds like your ex just kind of dropped the ball big time. Even if you guys were having issues, he should have been upfront with you about talking to this other girl instead of keeping it a secret. And then to just jump ship and choose her over you after all that time together? That's just cold.

I get why you felt like you had to cut that bridge and get out of there. When someone treats you that way and then lets their new partner spread lies about you, that's a sign that they're not worth hanging onto. You deserve way better than that.

Try not to blame yourself or wonder what you could have done differently. Sometimes people just make crappy choices, and that's on them - not you. You gave that relationship your all for 3 years, and that's nothing to feel ashamed about.

The best thing you can do now is just focus on healing and moving forward. Surround yourself with the people who really care about you and will have your back. Don't give your ex or this new girl the satisfaction of seeing you broken down.

In time, you'll be able to look back on this and realize that you dodged a bullet. This is their loss, not yours. You're gonna bounce back even stronger, girl. Just hang in there and take it one day at a time. You got this!

[SueShe]

People don't communicate anymore. Everything is texting but there is not much talking on a face-to-face basis. That would help solve a lot of issues because when you talk with a person, you see their facial expressions and reactions that you cannot when you text.

He was "talking" to another girl. Was he just doing the talking or was he actually seeing her and cheating on you with her? That is a big difference. Talking is nothing to worry about as much as being intimate.

There is always a reason why someone decides to see someone else while being in a relationship. Most often, it is because they can't obtain with the current partner what they can with the new one. It is sad to realize that the relationship boils down to the intimate part and that this is more important than all the other things about a person.

As to the why he did it? Only he can give you the reply but given the fact that he seems to have found a substitute so easily leads me to believe that he is a superficial and toxic person.

Take as much distance as possible with him because he is just misusing you for his comfort.

[_Maya_]

Why would you even care? He is your ex. Of course he isn't going to say nice things about you. Did you expect anything less? You don't give context to why you and your ex broke up and that's fine but I'm guessing that it wasn't amicable. I only say that because if what you say here is true then it probably wasn't. The more important thing is why even bother? He is an ex and let that be exactly that. Don't concern yourself with what he thinks or says. It no longer has a bearing on your life and this new girl doesn't either. When you let it get to you they have already won. To come online and post about it proves just that. Move on with your life and don't worry what exes are doing.

[Flower7]

Stop communicating with your ex. If he wasn’t still in your life, you wouldn’t even know what the girl is saying about you.

[Nikki1989]

Move on. Use this experience as an opportunity for personal growth and self-reflection, and forget about this man.