Why did she choose him over me?

I don't understand why my crush chose him over me?

Looks wise, we have the same body type, I could kick his ass, I have much cleaner hair and nice facial hair.

Career wise, He works in technology what ever that means... Money wise I probably make more if not the same amount.

I don't know his personality, but my crush and I got along well, we laughed, joked flirted.

Effort wise, I would have done a lot for her, he wouldn't... She has to put in a lot of work for their relationship, planning, driving, she does everything... He seems to not put in too much effort.

I just don't know why she chose him, I feel like I'm way better than him...

The only two possible stupid reasons I can think of, but don't know if it can be true:

-She is Chinese and wanted a Chinese Guy
(I'm not Chinese)

-She wanted someone with an Apartment/Lives alone

-Age, wanted someone older than her?(I'm 1.5 years younger)

I just am lost why she chose him over me...

What does he have that I don't?


Most Helpful Girl

  • It's not at all about what he has that you don't. While all that stuff is great, attraction also had to do with chemicals and chemistry. She just must have had more of a "spark" with the other guy. It's no fault of your own or anything you're lacking, at least from what I can tell in the information given.

    • I'm kinda hurt.

      Why does he spark more, it's hurting my coincidence... I feel like I'm lacking something, feel insecure, feel like it's my fault

    • Show All
    • Just chemicals, pheremones, chemistry, whatever you want to call it. Our bodies are predisposed to be attracted to some more than others, and it's not something you can change. Sorry man, time to move on.

    • I guess, I'm really down, I feel like I should have been a better guy, more funny, showing off money more, did more :(

      I'm taking it personally I guess

Most Helpful Guy

  • Yeah. Asian girls won't go for someone younger. Her parents will approve his chineseness more than you and they can also speak Chinese together.
    Chinese people are racist as fuck. She would probably be seen to "bring shame upon" her family or make them "lose face" if she dates a non Chinese man.

    Also he has his own place. That's a biggie.

    • That's how I'm thinking,

    • I think acceptance is your key here. Move on and find someone better.

    • It's hard to find better, she was the best!

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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 2

  • People are complicated. Her desires may be unrelated to everything you listed. As a human being, she has every right to go after her own game, and that's okay. Don't value your relationship by how much effort, time, or money you gave her.

    Your current relationship with her exists. Don't lose that over who she wants to date.

    • I kinda am placing value on that, because I just don't know why.

      I kinda messed up, I've lost her, I was mean and stopped talking to her... :( I shouldn't have done that, but I was so hurt at the time

    • If you two were really close, come clean and tell her you got carried away by emotions. Hopefully she'll understand, and at least work towards forgiveness.

    • Yeah I tried that, she said it was "cool" and hoped we could stay friends... but she never texts me anymore, like she used to.

  • she chose him cause he has much larger dick


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