We are best friends, but are we anything more?

[Anonymous]

So I’ve known him since high school, and we was always extremely close friends. I always liked him more than a friend but I never made this known during our teenage years. At 19 we both got married, him and his wife are still together and have a “perfect” relationship. They are both very happy, and he doesn’t have a bad word to say about her. Me and my husband have split recently after a long relationship of abuse and him cheating.

since the split he has been my rock, I have been escaping domestic violence and with little friends to talk too he’s been there for me. He’s helped me with conversation, taking me out and keeping me busy, he’s gave me money to help me out when I haven’t asked for it, and overall he’s just been really supportive. Last week, I asked him to drop me some wine if he was passing my house, and he ended up coming in. One thing led to another and we had sex, it was the most amazing sex I have ever experienced. Afterwards he cuddled me, and held my hand. We spoke as normal the next day but then he went quiet, today he rang me and said he doesn’t regret what happened with us, but that it can’t happen again. That if life was different we could continue, but he can’t lose his family, and he loves his wife. He said he never wants to lose me as a friend, and that he’d alwYs care about me.

bow im really confused, and feel like it’s ruined the friendship, and I’m also, if I’m being honest, feeling upset he doesn’t want me enough to risk anything. Which I know is selfish, and I know it’s wrong.

im just wondering what I am to him.

[lyrem04]

Honestly, I feel like the friendship shifted the moment you both got into separate relationships. It was never meant to go beyond that — and let’s be real, you both crossed serious lines. Maybe you’re meant for each other and that’s to spare his wife and family because they deserve better than that. This is exactly why I struggle to believe in purely platonic friendships between guys and girls.. this was a tough read ngl.

[StevenMcGarrett]

He definitely wanted you and he's glad that it happened. On the other hand, he doesn't want to risk losing his wife and family. The best thing to do is to befriend his wife and get close to her. Tell her about your situation and say it was horrible being abused and your husband is amazing. I really need some sex though with someone I can trust, do you think we could have a threesome? If she says no to that, you can ask her to share him. Good luck.

[Asker]

This literally sounds like something he would wrote himself 🤣

[StevenMcGarrett]

I had a similar situation happen to me last year. My friend from work got divorced and we started talking and we got real close. She wanted to know if I could get a free pass from my wife. I told her, I don't think she trusts you enough for that but she would be open to a threesome if you talk to her. So one night I have them each other's phone numbers and they agreed on the threesome and I let them work out the details and day, etc. the threesome was amazing (it was her first) and we had it a few more times until she was comfortable to date again.

[Yohenis]

Jesus christ, bro cheated on his. Wife and says he love his wife lol you're a side chick my friend or Friends With benefits.