I don’t know how to get over this, someone help me?

[Anonymous]

hey everyone,
so here’s the situation. last year in October my boyfriend met two girls while he was out at dinner with a group of his friends. he followed them on ig and he DMed one of the girls memes. he didn’t tell me about these girls, i found out he was following one of them because she liked a picture of his, i asked if he knew who she was and he said no. little did i know a few weeks later i look at her stories and there’s a picture on her stories of all three of them. when i tell you i was distraught, i was hurt. i waited until he called me and i asked and he admitted it. i asked why he didn’t tell me he said he didn’t want to hurt my feelings and then i asked why he wanted to be friends with them and he said he didn’t want to he just wanted attention. i tried my hardest to forgive him however it’s engraved in my brain. now he goes to this bar thing with his friends and he followed a waitress on IG. the place has good food, a pool table, and a bar. i checked on the waitress IG and all she posts is bikini pictures. i’ll admit im very insecure. i hate the fact he follows a lot of bikini girls and he used to like a lot of pictures. i’m not sure if he still likes pictures i have no idea. anyway, i can’t get over it and i truly want to become secure in myself. i look at the girls he follows and i look nothing like it. i don’t have the body or the confidence like the girls who follows does. i truly want this relationship to work but if it doesn’t i still want to become confident in myself. nothing is worse than brining low confidence and low self esteem into a relationship where the other person did nothing. so pls someone help me?

[Changiis07]

The thing is HE is making YOU feel insecure by his actions. There was no need to lie about what happened and the fact that he even followed the girl and sent her memes shows you that he is out and about looking at other girls and the fact that he followed a waitress made me think he has been charming to them when he is out. You shouldn't have to feel this way. He sounds like he wants to be single. I would be livid if I found out my current boyfriend is out and about and following girls let alone messaging them memes AND liking their pics. I already had a talk with him and told him what my boundaries are. He has respected them and if he doesn't I would not be able to trust him, you have every right to feel how you feel

[HollyK21]

Of course you can’t forgive him he’s betrayed your trust more than once and he’s most likely cheating with other girls. There’s no way on earth you can dispute the evidence and his words should carry zero value since he literally lies to your face unflinchingly. I know you really want the relationship to work but there genuinely has to come a point where even if your confidence and self esteem are lacking, your self respect and self love are still intact. Once you show him that no matter what he does you will still stick around, the relationship is doomed. He’s not going to do a 180, so I hope you choose to be the first to end this before he does. Seriously, you do not wanna give him the satisfaction of doing all this and then dumping you on top of that. You think you feel like shit about yourself now, humiliation and devastation would hardly scratch the surface of that depression. Do better while you can.