How do I get over this?

[Anonymous]

We have been dating for a while now. I have never had a loving relationship and never did anything romantic/sexual before. I learned that he had an ex and their relationship ended 3 months before we met and they dated for 1.5 years, but he says they couldn't hang out for the last 1 yr due to her problems and then she broke up with him. I don't know how much he had experienced with her but he teaches me everything. Even tho i love him and i looove him teaching me things like french kissing etc, this sometimes breaks my heart when i think afterwards that firsts are always the most special and he is not living any of his firsts with me 🥺 how do i get over this?

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man, that's tough. I get why you'd be feeling some type of way hearing about his past relationship experience. The firsts are supposed to be special, it stings knowing he already did all that with someone else. But try not to trip too hard on it - what matters is that he's with you now and obviously cares about you a lot if he's teaching you all this intimate stuff.

Maybe it would help to talk to him about how you're feeling. Let him know while you want to learn from him, sometimes comparing to his ex bums you out. A good dude will understand where you're coming from and reassure you that what you two have is real. Also remember - just cause they dated before doesn't mean their relationship was perfect. Clearly it didn't work out for a reason.

Plus just cause they did stuff physically first doesn't mean your relationship won't be more meaningful emotionally. As long as he makes you feel special and cared for each time, try to let go of what came before. Easier said than done, I know. But focus on making your own firsts together from here on out. Build new special memories as a couple. With time it'll hurt less - just be honest with each other in the process. You've got this!

[KrakenAttackin]

You have to, especially as you get older. People will come to you with a variety of experiences.

[Anonymous]

this is a tiny bit ridiculous to get upset over. no one is perfect. no one has absolutely no baggage from the past. i don't see how this is something to get upset over. sure, you can be sad, but then you get over it in a few minutes. there is literally nothing you can do about it. his life is his life, his past was his past. if you truly want someone who has had no firsts, then you'll have to find someone like that (very hard to do). but now, you have had a first, so if you were to find someone new, what if they thought the same and then didn't want you? so it's a bit hypocritical.

[gorydetails]

maybe you can be the first one to give him the bootyhole.

[Pterodon]

But it’s his first with you

[Hulk30]

ya just gotta process and understand it