What does it mean when my boyfriend says I wish things were different with us?

[Anonymous]

What does it mean when he says that? I asked what he means by that and he said me mentally. Like he wishes I wasn’t dumb?

[slatyb]

We have no idea, but it sounds like your relationship is not so great.

[whosnumber_1]

I think he needs to explain himself. That is gaslighting thing to say

[Asker]

Really? How?

[whosnumber_1]

By making a negative comment about your relationship and not explaining himself it's pretty rude

[Asker]

Yeah it is! And it’s because of my autism really. Why wouldn’t he admit it?

[whosnumber_1]

It's her autistic as well?

[whosnumber_1]

Sorry... Is he autistic as well?

[Asker]

No he’s not autistic

[whosnumber_1]

Well friend, tell him what he said to you bothers you and that you don't like being gaslit. You can't help the way you process things and it's not a very nice thing to say.

[Asker]

Yeah you’re right! He sounds prejudiced?

[whosnumber_1]

If it smells like shit...

[whosnumber_1]

Call him out. Don't be afraid to ask for clarification on the moment.. what do you mean by that?

[whosnumber_1]

Another good tactic is just ask people to repeat themselves... If they have said something rude or stupid they usually squirm when they have to repeat themselves because they know they are wrong

[Asker]

Huh? What do you mean? Call him out on what?

[whosnumber_1]

... On his comment of how he wishes things were different between you

[Asker]

Ok what can I say?

[whosnumber_1]

tell him what he said to you bothers you and that you don't like being gaslit.

[Asker]

Ok I can tell him

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

He’s going to break up with you when it’s convenient for him

[Asker]

Why? Because I’m “different”?

[Asker]

That’s discrimination

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

It’s not legal discrimination in dating.

[AI Opinion]

My aim on GAG is to help you decode this messy relationship stuff and protect your heart, gorgeous 💋

When a guy says “I wish things were different with us” and then adds “mentally,” he’s basically saying he isn’t satisfied with how you think, feel, or communicate. That “dumb” comment is a huge red flag. It’s disrespectful, emotionally damaging, and low-key toxic.

You deserve someone who admires your mind, doesn’t insult it.

[Anonymous]

It means he wants some changes in your relationship. I don't know him personally, so I can't be sure what exactly he wants.

[Asker]

Ok like what? Is he discriminating?

[Opinion Owner]

Discriminating what? Are you different ethnicity/nationality, or religion, or race?

[Asker]

Yeah disability I have autism. What does it mean when he says I wish things were different like he wishes I wasn’t autistic?

[Opinion Owner]

He never mentioned autism, maybe he means something else, like a deeper relationship.

[Asker]

He has mentioned autism before

[Opinion Owner]

In what context?

[Asker]

Like communication and understanding things

[Opinion Owner]

Autistic people understand things quite well, but they lack communication skills.
Maybe you should talk to him more often, to work on your communication skills.

[In_Trance]

I think he's trying to tell you that he wishes things were different between you and him

[Asker]

How?

[In_Trance]

Have you asked him how?